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Why "We" Didn't Choose You: A Relationship Handbook for Women (and Men), Vol. I Paperback – 2010

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Product Details

  • Paperback: 235 pages
  • Publisher: ZL Publishing House; 1ST edition (2010)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0615411495
  • ISBN-13: 978-0615411491
  • Product Dimensions: 8.5 x 5.5 x 0.8 inches
  • Average Customer Review: 4.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (20 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #2,568,394 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

WILLIAM T. HOSTON, Ph.D., is a professor, author, motivational speaker, poet, and documentarian who hails from New Orleans, Louisiana. He is associate professor of political science at the University of Houston - Clear Lake. Dr. Hoston received his Ph.D. from the University of New Orleans (UNO) in 2007.

He is the author of numerous publications, which range in topic from minority voting behavior, political behavior of African-American politicians, and theories and dynamics of racism and oppression. Dr. Hoston has penned a total of six books, most recently: Listen to Me Now, or Listen to Me Later, 2nd Edition (2014); Black Masculinity in the Obama Era: Outliers of Society (2014); and No Bullies in the Huddle (2013). He is currently completing two academic books: (1) The End of a Black Empowerment Period in New Orleans: 1978-2010 and (2) The Secret Life of Mr. Waller: Essays on Race, Crime, and the Black Male Subculture.

In 2013, Dr. Hoston released the documentary, "Black Dot in a White World: Critical Discourse Among Black Males in the Obama Era," which expands the discussion of the economic, social, and political plight of black males in the Obama Era. It features the likes of Civil Rights Icon, John Lewis; Educator, Dr. Steve Perry; Urban League President, Marc Morial; Rap Icon, Master P and his son, Romeo, and a host of others that discuss what it means to be a black male in the 21st century and the impact of living in the Obama Era (

Dr. Hoston has proved his dedication and commitment to empowering youth and college students to have a brighter future, which was recognized by UHCL as he was the recipient of the 2013 Minnie Stevens Piper Award for outstanding teaching. He also was ranked in the 2012 - 2013 academic year as the 19th best college professor in America according to Dr. Hoston's motto is, "I just want to be an example. Many have come before me and hopefully those that come after will be inspired by the example that I have set."

See his website: You can also follow him on Twitter @DrHoston.

Customer Reviews

4.9 out of 5 stars
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They seemed really personable and believable.
Courtney M
Women and men should read this book, whether they are in a relationship or not.
Beryl Ann Gauthier
Surprisingly, I really enjoyed the book and was very glad I read it!

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By Pix76 on May 27, 2011
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
I was skeptical about this book at first, because of the narcissistically condescending tone of its title. "Why WE didn't choose YOU" implies (in my opinion) that the men are in a position to "have their pick" of pathetic women who are desperate to be considered "worthy." But curiosity (and so many positive reviews) compelled me to purchase it; I also bought The Conversation: How Men and Women Can Build Loving, Trusting Relationships at the same time.

Surprisingly, I really enjoyed the book and was very glad I read it! Like several other reviewers, I read the WHOLE thing in one sitting (it's about 200 pages, but they turn quickly). I went through a range of emotions as the men in this focus group gave their opinions...from compassion, to amusement, to shock, to outrage, and finally to a sense of my own empowerment as a woman. It was clear that some of the men were far less mature than others, but ALL of their stories were educational. Let me first briefly describe the contents before I go into what I took away from it:

There are six men in the focus group (the term "man" may be only loosely applied to a couple of them), representing different walks of life and (most notably) differing maturity levels. Chapter I consists of letters written by each of the guys to women that they had previously broken up with. The letters appear very honest as each writer explains what led to the break up from his perspective. They describe what they did wrong and what they feel the women did wrong. Then, each of the guys offers his perspectives on the topics presented in Chapters II-V.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By CheRio on December 22, 2010
Format: Paperback
This was a great read. Straightforward. Honest. Sometimes biting. There were some hard truths that were brought out. Some women might be taken aback by some of the things the men talked about, but if you are real with yourself you will recognize that there is definite truth in much of what is said. I like that the men acknowledged the role each of them played in the demise of their respective relationships. Recognizing the mistakes made by not only their partner, but themselves as well. I appreciated their candor. I appreciate the author's effort in getting these men to reveal these things about themselves and their relationships. I'm sure that was no easy feat. I truly believe there is much to be learned from this book. It is an eye opener of sorts for us women. We get a glimpse into how the male mind works in connection to relationships. It can provide, for some, a better understanding as to why their relationship(s) did not work out. I think it is very important for potential readers to know that this is not a book about men placing the blame solely on women for the failed relationships. The title may allude to that, but it is far from being the case. It is more about what both parties can and should do differently in order to have a successful and meaningful relationship. Enjoy it!
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A Kid's Review on December 22, 2010
Format: Paperback
I am really surprise to enjoy this book, since it is written by a guy. Thought it was full of male endorsed reasons and excuses, for dumping great women, and get us to follow their every whim. IT is so SAD!!!!! and enlightening and not like that.
First it is written from one guy, about 6 other guys, about relationships. It starts off with letters to their ex, that they still regret leaving or they still think about. They better regret leaving us!Cry! Weep! and gain 10lb in the process!
Secondly, it remind us the double standard effect. As a women, we always think that the man should be the one to keep us, and every end to relationship is their fault. It a two person thing and we tend to forget it.
Third, Men should read this!!!!! All men should read this! Men do stuff like this, and it is not till ten years later when they are having a drink with their boys that they understand why the leave good women, and regret it, as they settle for 'okay' and regret marriage..
Fourth, I understood why, women get dumped by guys, and reasons behind their 'Its not you, Its me' excuse.
This book is not for the weak-hearted. It is realistic and not sugar coated with 'Sex in the City' masque or comedic like 'Friends'. It is 'Crash' with all the reality baked in.
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By Kindle Customer on December 22, 2010
Format: Paperback
In what has to be one of the most timely and necessary pieces of work to date, "Why We Didn't Choose You" delivers in all aspects upon examination of relationships through the male point of view. Dr. Hoston brilliantly takes six different mens' perspective on their personal thoughts and experiences to captivate readers attention on key elements that make or break many relationships. As an avid supporter of topics that address the demise of relationships, I personally was blown away by not only the detail of the content, but the hard truths it revealed. The poems were beautifully written in addition to express and evoke feeling to the reader. This book is and can be simply life changing for women who truly let the message it delivers resonates. It challenges you to reflect on how you were reactive to a problem, while helpfully giving recommendations to be proactive lessening problems. This book is nothing short of stellar with Dr. Hoston serving as the master mind behind its conception. I am definitely looking forward to more projects from him in the future. People, please if you have not purchased this book do so today and treat yourself to a new and true work of art.
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