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This fascinating investigation into what makes abusive men tick is alarming, but its candid handling of a difficult subject makes it a valuable resource for professionals and victims alike. Bancroft, the former codirector of Emerge, the nation's first program for abusive men, has specialized in domestic violence for 15 years, and his understanding of his subject and audience is apparent on every page. "One of the prevalent features of life with an angry or controlling partner is that he frequently tells you what you should think and tries to get you to doubt or devalue your own perceptions and beliefs," he writes. "I would not like to see your experience with this book re-create that unhealthy dynamic. So the top point to bear in mind as you read [this book] is to listen carefully to what I am saying, but always to think for yourself." He maintains this level of sensitivity and even empathy throughout discussions on the nature of abusive thinking, how abusive men manipulate their families and the legal system and whether or not they can ever be cured. Jargon-free analysis is frequently broken up by interesting first-person accounts and boxes that distill in-depth information into simple checklists. Bancroft's book promises to be a beacon of calm and sanity for many storm-tossed families.
Copyright 2002 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
Bancroft, a former codirector of Emerge, the first U.S. program for abusive men, and a 15-year veteran of work with abusive men, reminds readers that each year in this country, two to four million women are assaulted by their partners and that at least one out of three American women will be a victim of violence by a husband or boyfriend at some point in her life. His valuable resource covers early warning signs, ten abusive personality types, the abusive mentality, problems with getting help from the legal system, and the long, complex process of change. After dispelling 17 myths about abusive personalities, he sheds light on the origin of the abuser's values and beliefs, which he finds to be a better explanation of abusive behavior than reference to psychological problems. Bancroft extends his approach to problematic gay and lesbian relationships as well, making the book that much more useful and empowering. This is essential reading for those in the helping professions and highly recommended for all libraries, especially those in communities with emergency shelter programs. Dale Farris, Groves, TX
Copyright 2002 Cahners Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
The author has a thorough knowledge of abusers of women from working with abusers as clients (and consulting with the women they abuse) every day. Read morePublished 5 days ago by Charles McKeon Jr.
I can't say enough good things about this book. It has helped me and countless friends get out of bad situations and stay safe.Published 5 days ago by Al D.
This book confirms the thoughts that you question about your challenging partner. It goes over why they do things and why its not okay.Published 7 days ago by Jessica Brooks
Hugely helpful. Answered alot of questions about my ex I've had for a long time. Also, it was written in a way that I didn't feel guilty about the mistakes I made--like "here's... Read morePublished 8 days ago by Sarah Smolowitz
Every woman in the world should read this book, whether or not she is in an abusive relationship. It should be required reading for attorneys, judges, CPS, and custody evaluators. Read morePublished 9 days ago by Valiant
Lots of great, accurate information - highly recommend this book - the author is very knowledgeable and provides an unusually large amount of info on the subject of abuse.Published 11 days ago by Mary S Christopher
This book is eye-opening... one of the best you'll read on domestic violence. On one hand, it's chilling to realize that violence is so intentional, because it works to get them... Read morePublished 13 days ago by HappyMomof2