Customer Reviews

Why Doesn't Anybody Like Me?: A Guide To Raising Socially Confident Kids

5 star:		(3)
4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(2)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(2)

 

 

This book is one of the best parenting books I have ever read. Although there seems to be lots of research as to how children act in a social context, little or nothing has been written for parents. Ms. Marano makes a very convincing case that social competence is very important for children, citing lots of research in a very clear manner (too bad the publisher decided to leave the references out). She explains in detail what makes a child well liked by other children and what not. She also points out that, although social competence is in part a genetic matter, parents have a lot of influence on their children's social behaviour. She offers lots of (fun) suggestions for improving children's social skills. I thought this book was a real page turner and highly recommend it.

I agree with previous comments about the amount of research that went into writing this book, however after reading through all of the research, I had a feeling of doom. I have two sons aged 7 and 4, and my oldest is having difficulty making friends at his new school after our family relocated from the midwest to the east coast. I was looking for fun, practical solutions to helping him make new friends. What I found was a book that explained extensive research on the subject of popularity,but many of the comments made by the author left me feeling that my son had little hope in improving his social situation. I especially felt disheartend to find that according to the author, a child's social standing is pretty much determined by the first grade! My son's in first grade now. I was a psychology major in college, and could appreciate much of the research, but the book read more like a textbook to me than a book for parents looking for practical solutions to helping their kids form friendships.

This book is more of a research summary than a guide to helping your child. It is interesting and enlightening on the subject of research that has been done on kids social interaction, but its limited material on how to help your child is vague and not very convincing. It left me feeling that: yes, I recognized my daughter as a socially unsuccessful child, but I didn't know what to do about it. If you want an excellent how-to guide, try "Good Friends are Hard to Find" by Fred Frankel.

Citing considerable scientific research, the author paints a vivid picture of the social dynamics of a child's world. She describes in detail the different social "categories" children are automatically placed in by their peers (bullies, victims, etc.) as early as kindergarten and first grade. For these categories, the author describes how differences in parenting styles and methods can contribute to a child receiving a particular label.

As a parent of a toddler and a preschooler, this book helped me to understand how I can contribute to my children's social development in a meaningful way. Topics such as the importance of free play vs. organize classes, and how to help the developing brain learn to manage emotions were particularly helpful. I feel lucky to have read the book early in my children's lives, since I now have some specific tools for helping my child become socially confident.

The author makes it clear that social issues arise early, and can stick with a child for life. Unfortunately, the book provides little guidance for parents of older children who are struggling, and how to change. In that regard, the title seems to be somewhat misleading -- unless you consider your children to be "raised" when they hit kindergarten! Also, the book is far from a "guide". Though the content is excellent, the sections that provided specific tips for parents were overly simplistic and seemed to be something of an afterthought.

For parents of very young children, I would consider this book a must-read. If you have an older child who is struggling, I think the book might miss the mark.

I grew up as a tormented outcast, and my biggest fear about having children is the dread that they might be like me. This book, which collects a lot of solid and well-researched information in one place, has helped to ease my fears. Now I understand many of the things that went wrong for me, and that helps me to believe that it doesn't have to be that way.

Don't just ignore your child's unhappiness. Take this crucial problem seriously, and buy this book to learn about the underlying factors and some of the practical steps you can take to help.

This is a good base for parents whose kids are having a hard time in school. I found it to be very Cause & Effect which was just what my son (and I) needed. I read it three or four years ago when my son was having a dreadfully hard time. I put the concepts from the book to practice in my own way (i.e., "movie dates" with him where we watched movies and discussed emotions and 'reading' people's body language). No my son is 12 and in 7th grade and he has friends, not tons, but a few, but he is happy and content. Kids like him, he doesn't feel desperate to fit in.

This book is very practical and well worth the time to read and money spent to have it be part of your library... along with Brazelton and Sears.

Only buy this book if you want to feel your child is a loser, it's ALL your fault and there's nothing you can do about it, EVER! I'm not even going to pass this book on, it's going in the trash! That being said, there are some great kids social skills books out there: 1.) The unwritten rules of friendship 2.) Nobody likes me, everybody s me 3.) Good friends are hard to find

I was just curious as to what it talks about. I read the foreword only and I felt as though it was not only realistic but outlined as though there is some formula for someone to like you. It may have been informative for someone else but not for me because I do not care who does not like me. Usually people that do not like you do not like themselves and you remind them of something that they are not and never will be.I passed it on to someone else. If you buy this keep in mind that if you love yourself, to not care what someone else thinks becomes second nature. Books cannot generalize a subject like this because everyone is different and there is always inner spirits of people in conflict with one another. If people do not like you that means you are doing something right. Probably not everything but something.

I hate the book. It was the worst thing i've ever seen! What ever you do, do NOT buy this book!!!