Why I'm Still Married: Women Write Their Hearts Out on Love, Loss, Sex, and Who Does the Dishes [Hardcover]

Karen Propp (Author), Jean Trounstine (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: January 19, 2006

Twenty-four bestselling and award-winning women writers explore one of life's most challenging and rewarding relationships

In the spirit of the bestselling The Bitch in the House, Why I'm Still Married captures the passion, loss, joy, friendship, and humor that marks lifelong commitment through a brilliant kaleidoscope of voices, such as Julia Alvarez, Susan Cheever, Elizabeth Graver, Erica Jong, Aimee Liu, Bharati Mukherjee, ZZ Packer, and Marge Piercy.

Revealing the myriad ways in which women navigate the bumpy terrain of emotional intimacy, weather arguments and separations, adjust to parenting, avoid-or succumb to-the temptation of infidelity, and decide who does the dishes, this riveting collection is at once unique and universal, and will speak to any woman who's ever been in a long-term relationship.

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Whether they're on their first marriage or their fourth, each of the 24 contributors to this thought-provoking collection has terrific stories and wisdom to share, and they all do it masterfully. "Nobody is a perfect match and we have to accept that," writes Marge Piercy, who has learned to accommodate her husband's quirks, just as he has hers. Editor Propp's husband expressed his annoyance—anger, actually—over differences so viciously that after five years she began fantasizing about leaving. Instead, she went to the Internet, read about verbal abuse and learned to stand up for herself. NPR reporter Maria Hinojosa says, "I stay married because this is the one person who understands how to help make me into a better person." You might not agree with everyone's theories—Hannah Pine defends her choice to be a mother in an open marriage—but each one deals with the real problems, and pleasures, of marriage. As editor Trounstine puts it: "[m]arriage doesn't have the excitement of the illicit or the thrill of the daredevil. It's more like the quiet hum of the everyday and the occasional surprise of the sunset."
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

From Booklist

In light of the fact that half of modern marriage end in divorce, 24 acclaimed women writers offer their marital experiences, with glorious and inglorious histories and strong prospects. These are not the formulaic prescriptions typical of women's magazines but thoughtful reflections on marriages that have endured from 1 year to 20-plus years. The collection is organized by longevity, beginning with women who have been married 20 years or more and have experienced marriage in the broader context of social changes through those married less than a year and still grappling with the adjustment of a lifelong commitment to a single other person. The contributors represent a broad cross section of ages, geography, ethnicity, and sexual orientation, and they write about balancing career and marriage, raising children, negotiating domestic responsibilities, and nurturing spouse and self. Among the contributors are Anne Bernays, Susan Dworkin, Maria Hinojosa, Erica Jong, Aimee Liu, Bharati Mukherjee, and Marge Piercy. This is an honest, engaging look at the complexities of married life and the importance of trust, respect, and humor. Vanessa Bush
Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Reading level: Ages 14 and up
  
• Hardcover: 304 pages
• Publisher: Hudson Street Press (January 19, 2006)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1594630178
• ISBN-13: 978-1594630170
• Product Dimensions: 8.3 x 5.9 x 1.3 inches
• Shipping Weight: 15.5 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (8 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,659,717 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

I am a professor of humanities at Middlesex Community College in Lowell Massachusetts, and I specialize in writing, literature and theatre courses. I am never bored! I became a writer because of needing to write about working in prison. I needed to tell stories of the amazing women behind bars.

At Framingham Women's Prison in Massachusetts, I directed eight productions, including THE MERCHANT OF VENICE. Drawing from music history, women's history, art, literature and drama, the program eventually earned college credit and was nominated for a prestigious Schwartz Award, considered by the Mass Foundation for Humanities as the most successful project funded in 1988. It is the basis of my first book SHAKESPEARE BEHIND BARS: THE POWER OF DRAMA IN A WOMEN'S PRISON, published by St. Martin's Press, 2001.

Prison work changed me, and I've written many articles about teaching offenders and been featured on The Today Show, All Things Considered-NPR, and The Connection. I co-edited an anthology of writings used in the Changing Lives Through Literature Program, published by Notre Dame Press, a program I helped to establish for women in Massachusetts (see cltl.umassd.com), where criminals are sentenced to a literature seminar and probation instead of jail. Because of that work, I also coauthored FINDING A VOICE: THE PRACTICE OF CHANGING LIVES THROUGH LITERATURE, published by the University of Michigan Press (which also recently published the paperback of SBB).

My first collection of poetry, ALMOST HOME FREE, a collection of poetry about the journey of cancer -- I'm a survivor -- was published by Pecan Grove Press in 2003 and received enthusiastically.

Most recently I've co-edited a book with Karen Propp, WHY I'M STILL MARRIED, published by Hudson Street Press, an imprint of Penguin, 2006. Essayists include a slew of great writers!

I live more happily than not with my husband in Massachusetts.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

11 of 11 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Amazingly Personal, February 2, 2006

By 

R. Vysatova "roma" (Boston, MA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Why I'm Still Married: Women Write Their Hearts Out on Love, Loss, Sex, and Who Does the Dishes (Hardcover)

It's rare to be sharing so many intimate details about what's right and what's wrong in a marriage, probing as deeply into one's heart - even with best friends - as these women do. For some reason I find it harder to talk about my relationship openly since I've been married. I'm amazed that these authors had the courage to write such personal stories. I couldn't put it down, long after I knew I should be asleep, for several nights in a row. I'm definately going to share this book with my best friends; maybe it will inspire us to help each other through some of the difficult stuff we keep inside.

7 of 7 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Better than I expected, August 5, 2006

By 

Michel1030 (Medfield, MA United States) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Why I'm Still Married : Women Write Their Hearts Out on Love, Loss, Sex, and Who Does the Dishes (Hardcover)

I was expecting this to be a collection of "old fashioned" love stories-- women who found their mates early on and had longtime (20+ years) marriages that had endured hardships due to the stamina, patience, and tolerance of the women. However, that was the exception to the rule (thankfully). Most of the women had been married more than once, had loved and lost and found something better the second or even third time around. It was very interesting to read about the different types of relationships, both conventional and unconventional, in which love was so strong that commitment was a natural and desireable outcome.

7 of 8 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Why Am I Still Married?, February 22, 2006

By 

waderu (Ann Arbor, MI United States) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Why I'm Still Married: Women Write Their Hearts Out on Love, Loss, Sex, and Who Does the Dishes (Hardcover)

Each marriage had commonalities - conflict, love, lust, anger. And they all shared a deep desire to work hard, change when needed and support loved ones in their times of change. That is not to say that any two stories were alike or that any marriage is the same. It made me wonder "Why am I still married after 18 years?" And it prompted me to discuss it with my husband, which brought us closer together. Thanks to the wonderful authors for being so powerfully frank about their lives.