Customer Reviews

Why Do I Put So Much Pressure on Myself?: Confessions of a Recovering Perfectionist

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The thing that enlightened me most about reading Kathy's book is that just when I found myself proudly exclaiming, "See! I'm NOT a perfectionist!", I turned another page and discovered that I am! Perfectionism takes on many different faces. Some of us feel the need for perfect homes or work environments. Others of us feel the need to be PERFECT in order to gain entrance into the Kingdom of God, eliminating grace altogether!"Grace is the opposite of perfectionism," Kathy so "perfectly" writes. "In fact, perfectionism could be called 'ungrace' or 'disgrace.'"

In this book Kathy does more than just point out the "signs of perfectionism." She gives us hope and direction with "charts" (as only a perfectionist would do!)with alternatives to our "behavior!" How freeing it is to be ME! without the stress!

At the end of the book I felt the relief of knowing I can enjoy an "orderly" life, without the chains of feeling less than adequate. Life, according to my husband, is not a magazine cover. Sometimes its a little messy. That's what makes it life!

And life is good!

Thank you, Kathy, for giving us such a treasure with your personal stories and insights!!

I never saw myself as a perfectionist. But when my mom said to me one day when I was worrying to stop being a perfectionist I thought I guess I am one! I looked at this book and the first time ignored it. But when I realized how much I needed it the second time I bought it! I am SO glad I did!

The first child or only child too tends to be a perfectionist so I have read. I guess that could explain it! That is beside the point. Kathys book will bring new light to your life.

Being a perfectionist and a Christian can be hard. The check list at the beginning that ask if you answer to most you are a perfectionist. I thought I was checking MOST but I got ALL once I read the book! I almost cried every time I read something new that made me realize that TOO was something I did because I was a perfectionist. It opened me up to new thoughts on being a perfectionist and a Christian all at once.

NO we are not perfect! We cant be or we would have NEVER needed JESUS! The rubber band idea is my favorite one, snap it for every bad thought you have about yourself! I still need mine to 'snap' I got out of my habit of snapping it because I wasnt doing it as much because of it! I love Kathys stories and honesty and how she throws it all in there to make you *think* She even leaves a note at the end where to write her by snail mail, email or visit her site! This gal is too wonderful!

If you are a perfectionist and a Christian this book is for YOU! I have seen many books on being a perfectionist the ones on how to stop being one and the ones on how to use it! (I work in a bookstore) But this is the FIRST and ONLY so far that is a Christian one! Much better because it deals with all thoughts on life the spirtual side and the other ones too!

God Bless You Kathy! You have brought a new light to my life and helped me see myself differently. I say BUY THIS BOOK! It will change you and make you feel differently and hopefully help you to eventually w/Gods graceful help change! :)

Kathy Collard Miller's book was very helpful in my pursuit of a greater awareness of the pitfalls of my perfectionism and some tools to deal with is. This book offers a practical way to catch the triggers that set off some unhealthy behaviors, and how to overcome them. I also like the fact that she tied in this issue to God. The book certainly helped me feel better about myself, and greatly enhanced my spiritual development.

Kathy has done her research into the problem of perfectionism, and writes with heart because she knows its highs and lows. Those who are frustrated about people who don't meet their expectations and with the high standards they set for themselves, but can't reach, will find counsel and warning here. Kathy's personal stories are real and ones that many will identify with. Her appendix section on living with a perfectionist will help those who find themselves on the other side of the fence.

If you are looking for a self-help book that doesn't require a particular religious view point -- DON'T BUY THIS BOOK. Certainly, don't be fooled by the fact that the author/publisher go out of their way to obscure the fact this entire book is premised on a relationship with the Christian God. No doubt this manipulation is meant for our own good -- maybe we will 'accidently' be saved. That is if you are willing to be saved by people who would misrepresent themselves. You'll have to look carefully on the back cover to find any reference to the religious beliefs which dominate this book. I for one do not appreciate being mislead, and I resent having paid for this book!