Why We Hate Us: American Discontent in the New Millennium [Hardcover]

Dick Meyer (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: August 5, 2008

Americans are as safe, well fed, securely sheltered, long-lived, free, and healthy as any human beings who have ever lived on the planet. But we are down on America. So why do we hate us? According to Dick Meyer, the following items on this (much abbreviated) list are some of the contributors to our deep disenchantment with our own culture:

Cell-phone talkers broadcasting the intimate details of their lives in public spaces
Worship of self-awareness, self-realization, and self-fulfillment
T-shirts that read, “Eat Me”
Facebook, MySpace, and kids being taught to market themselves
High-level cheating in business and sports
Reality television and the cosmetic surgery boom
Multinational corporations that claim, “We care about you.”
The decline of organic communities
A line of cosmetics called “S.L.U.T.”
The phony red state–blue state divide
The penetration of OmniMarketing into OmniMedia and the insinuation of both into every facet of our lives

You undoubtedly could add to the list with hardly a moment’s thought. In Why We Hate Us, Meyer absolutely nails America’s early-twenty-first-century mood disorder. He points out the most widespread carriers of the why-we-hate-us germs, including the belligerence of partisan politics that perverts our democracy, the decline of once common manners, the vulgarity of Hollywood entertainment, the superficiality and untrustworthiness of the news media, the cult of celebrity, and the disappearance of authentic neighborhoods and voluntary organizations (the kind that have actual meetings where one can hobnob instead of just clicking in an online contribution).

Meyer argues—with biting wit and observations that make you want to shout, “Yes! I hate that too!”—that when the social, spiritual, and political turmoil that followed the sixties collided with the technological and media revolution at the turn of the century, something inside us hit overload. American culture no longer reflects our own values. As a result, we are now morally and existentially tired, disoriented, anchorless, and defensive. We hate us and we wonder why.

Why We Hate Us reveals why we do and also offers a thoughtful and uplifting prescription for breaking out of our current morass and learning how to hate us less. It is a penetrating but always accessible Culture of Narcissism for a new generation, and it carries forward ideas that resounded with readers in bestsellers such as On Bullshit and Bowling Alone.

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

In this study of American social self-loathing Meyer addresses why Americans have come to hate themselves (and each other) at a time of national prosperity and relative peace. In compelling, wonderfully cranky and comic prose, the author contends that the radical social changes of the 1960s and the recent technological revolution have drastically altered the pace of life, leaving Americans morally and existentially tired, disoriented, anchorless, and defensive. In arguments familiar to any sociology student, Meyer describes how the rise of freedom of choice in nearly every aspect of American life has been accompanied by the enervation of traditional social institutions (Our communities have been neutered, and our traditional, inherited moral, religious, and aesthetic sensibilities have been discredited). Pointed critiques of political theater, celebrity culture, the rise of marketing and media conglomerates and the decline of manners elaborate on the growing trends of bullshit, belligerence, and boorishness. Meyer is gleefully critical and very sincere in his concern for the state of American life; his practical suggestions urging readers to turn the tide of self-hate and phoniness are a must-read for anyone fed up with modern life. (Aug.) ""
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved."

Review

In the 1976 movie "Network," Howard Beale, a veteran news anchor played by Peter Finch, becomes psychotic after being told he's too old to anchor the newscast. On what is supposed to be his final broadcast, he breaks out into a rant about the problems of the day, imploring viewers to "get up right now ... go to your windows, open them, and stick your head out, and yell, 'I'm as mad as hell and I'm not going to take this anymore.' "

Viewers nationwide respond by shouting out their windows en masse. The impromptu segment is a ratings hit, and the lunatic broadcaster is given time on future broadcasts for his tirades.

That satire reflected the insanity of popular culture, particularly television, that reflects a misplaced anger and confused values in society. Those are all themes that inspire Dick Meyer's incisive cultural critique of modern society in "Why We Hate Us."

The book's central argument is that Americans are dissatisfied with their own society. Meyer points, with a wealth of supporting evidence at his fingertips - the vulgarity of the marketing industry, the media's fascination with Paris Hilton, even people who talk loudly on their cell phones - to what he calls the "toxic" cultural environment, which is rife with disingenuousness. Our resulting self-hate is illustrated, he says, by polls showing declining faith in institutions.

"Americans don't trust our institutions or one another," he writes. "Without trust, without a shared vocabulary, without community, we feel endangered."

The author, a former CBS News producer and columnist for the network's Web site who now works for NPR, draws on sources as disparate as existentialism, books on American suburbanization and interviews with an evangelical pastor to generate a book that goes a long way in making sense out of the zeitgeist. The success of the book is less in its description of the cultural climate than in the way he draws together seemingly unconnected experiences to explain with Occam's-razor logic a complex society that is drawn to its culture and also repulsed by it…

After his critique of society, which synthesizes many recent academic and popular assessments of modern life, Meyer offers a solution to the problems of the world: a return to some traditions that predate the '60s. "[I]t is necessary to find and nurture authentic commitments in private and community life," he writes. "In making thoughtful choices, it is necessary to cultivate a guiding 'moral temperament' - a philosophic perspective."

His solution may sound like a old-timey bromide, but it's a refreshing alternative.
—San Francisco Chronicle

Hasn’t something like this happened to all of us? Don’t you hate it? Ever wondered why Americans feel like this kind of behavior is acceptable and justified?

In Why We Hate Us: American Discontent in the New Millennium, Dick Meyer shares countless examples that illustrate his thesis that Americans have grown to hate us–not America, and not each other, but the culture we have created and in which we actively participate. We have private conversations in public places, we are constantly attached to electronic devices and often choose them over in-person contact with the people that are right in front of us, and we are suffering from a “lack of social self-respect.” Meyer diagnoses America with a chronic case of low self-esteem and concludes that we are acting out. He couldn’t be more right.

Meyer’s central thesis is that we hate us because phoniness—-that bane of Holden Caulfield’s existence—-has become “the emblematic malady of our times,” along with a lack of manners and “the decline of organic community.” He explores the irony in the fact that Americans are inundated with phoniness and know how to recognize spin—-basically, we know when we’re being bullshitted—-but we have become so steeped in it that our lives have begun to reflect the very things we hate…

I loved this book for being so smart when it would have been very easy for Meyer to dumb things down. I’m so proud of him for resisting the temptation to go the route of trying to entertain the reader rather than asking difficult questions and forcing us to reflect on our own behavior and our role in perpetuating and now fighting against a culture that is sick and in need of help. I saw myself in many of the things he described, and I didn’t like it. I felt inspired to reexamine my ethics, my consumption of media and products, and my social conduct and relationships.

Though there are many chuckle-inducing statements in this book, Why We Hate Us is definitely not a light read, and that is a very good thing. This is a sociological analysis of modern culture, a rallying cry, and a call for social change. It is a rather balanced look at how things are and why they are that way, and Meyer is not afraid to lay blame where it is due. The bad news is that we are all guilty. The good news is that “it is not a sign of terminal social disease that we do hate us,” because we can all participate in rebuilding our culture and repairing our national self-esteem.

And we can start by not clipping our toenails in public.

I give Why We Hate Us a very happy 5 out of 5... There’s a lot of information in this book, and there’s a lot that I couldn’t fit into my review. You should read it. Everyone should read it. We should make Why We Hate Us required reading for all Americans. It would be a good start.
—The Book Lady's Blog

"Dick Meyer has done the impossible -- he diagnoses the self-loathing, moral confusion and ennui that infect supersized America without hectoring us and badgering us, and without tiresome self-righteousness or smugness. Why We Hate Us takes us on a rollicking, laugh-out-loud ride across the brittle American landscape, and by 'us' I mean all of us -- liberal and conservative, black and white, city-dwellers, suburbanites and farmers. Dick Meyer understands that our national culture is on life-support, and he has thought long and hard about how to resuscitate it. Read this book, if not for you, than for your children, and for the America they will inherit."
—Jeffrey Goldberg, Atlantic Monthly national correspondent and author of Prisoners: A Story of Friendship and Terror

“A widely respected player in national politics, Dick Meyer has transcended the game most Americans hate to describe a larger context of relentless marketing, omnipresent pseudo-events and above all the enshrinement of phoniness that pollute the public square. Mixing original research, a keen, analytic mind and mordant, wicked wit, Why We Hate Us should be the bible for the vast majority of Americans who tell pollsters the country is on the wrong track but aren't clear why.”
—Thomas Oliphant, journalist and bestselling author of Praying for Gil Hodges: A Memoir of the 1955 World Series and One Family's Love of the Brooklyn Dodgers

“This is a serious, thought provoking discourse on America in the age of instant communication and a reminder that our new ability to know everything about everybody all the time may not be all good.”
—Bob Schieffer, Chief Washington Correspondent, CBS News 

“Meyer has written a deeply informed critique of those ‘toxic and menacing’ aspects of American culture in which individuals, families, and communities have suffered as ‘self-awareness, self-realization and self-actualization became the measure of emotional and existential health.’ Meyer has put into words the tensions and anxieties that grip all Americans as they go about the difficult task of achieving happiness while struggling to ‘find a compass’ to give their lives moral legitimacy and purpose. If you are aiming for one guide to the well-lived life, buy this book.”
—Thomas B. Edsall, Joseph Pulitzer II and Edith Pulitzer Moore Professor at the Columbia Graduate School of Journalism, Political Editor of the Huffington Post, and author of Building Red America: The New Conservative Coalition and the Drive for Permanent Power

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Hardcover: 288 pages
• Publisher: Crown; 1 edition (August 5, 2008)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0307406628
• ISBN-13: 978-0307406620
• Product Dimensions: 6.4 x 1 x 9.6 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1.1 pounds
• Average Customer Review: 3.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (19 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #315,758 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Discover books, learn about writers, read author blogs, and more.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

64 of 66 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A skewering, barbed, funny, and ultimately surprising book., August 6, 2008

By 

James Meyer - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

Amazon Verified Purchase

This review is from: Why We Hate Us: American Discontent in the New Millennium (Hardcover)

As a rural American reading, "Why We Hate Us," I found myself asking time and again: Who are these people that Mr. Meyer is presenting? These aren't the people in my world, in my community. I argued point after point with him in my inner-dialogue. But as I continued to read, and follow his line of reasoning, which is cogent and tightly woven, I had to cede one point after another. I am sorry to say that in the end I had to conclude that the "They" he is writing about is "Us."

Mr. Meyer examines our culture from his point of view as a Washington insider. What surprised me was how closely it related to my rural point of view. He moves beyond the Beltway. I think anyone who looks around and is puzzled or shocked or worried by what is to be seen in our society will appreciate Mr. Meyer's thoughts. This is not a rant, it an examination. It is also bleak. Having said that, it is also a humorous and personal revelation of his own history. As much as anything it is a story of family and community. The significance of this book lies within the last chapter. Unlike so many books that tear-down, Mr. Meyer leaves us with something very surprising: hope. He shows us a way out. His parting thoughts are, to put it simply, uplifting. Not something I would have expected when I began the book. His next book might well be titled, "Why We Hate Us Less", if readers incorporate at least a portion of his intent into their lives.

34 of 37 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A Must read, August 7, 2008

By 

Karen Spencer Kelly (Philadelphia, PA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

Amazon Verified Purchase

This review is from: Why We Hate Us: American Discontent in the New Millennium (Hardcover)

Have you been wondering "what is wrong?" with our society, our local communities, our own homes? If you have struggled with the harsh reality of being iritated, if not infuriated, on a daily basis with items ranging from an obscene jingle to the war in Iraq, you need, nay you must, read Mr. Meyer's book. It is engaging, witty, well-researched and extremely well-written. But more importantly, it may provide answers to those questions that continue to nag us about the source of our collective dysfunction; and hopefully, also offer suggestions about how we can correct our deviant course, as a nation and as individuals.

20 of 22 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Journalist and Author Dick Meyer Sees Us as a Country That Has Succumbed to Learned Helplessness, August 24, 2008

By 

M. JEFFREY MCMAHON "herculodge" (Torrance, CA USA) - See all my reviews
(TOP 500 REVIEWER)    (VINE VOICE)    (REAL NAME)   

Amazon Verified Purchase

This review is from: Why We Hate Us: American Discontent in the New Millennium (Hardcover)

Writing with thoughtful intelligence and keen insight, Dick Meyer, author of Why We Hate Us: American Discontent in the New Millennium, is sincerely haunted by several questions regarding our country's current malaise: Why are so many of us lonely? Why are so many of us depressed and angry? Why are so many of us defensive and paranoid? Why are so many of us distrustful of everyone? Why are we so willing to accept phoniness and ineptness from others, including our government? Why have so many of us surrendered to a condition of learned helplessness and apathy in which not only do we not know what questions we should be asking to solve our depression, we don't even have anyone to confide in should we know the questions we should be asking.

To answer these questions about our country's collective low-self-esteem and paralyzing depression, Meyer tells us a story about ourselves. The story is about a country that has lost common, shared values and virtues, a country that having lost community has replaced communal bonds with fierce tribes and clans that aggrandize themselves while demonizing their "opponents."

The beginning of this story is for Meyer, "Phase One," the Aquarian Promise of Free Love during the 1960s in which there were no boundaries to the freedom, the ego, the sense of self. This Unlimited freedom without a moral roadmap resulted in hedonism, egotism, and ultimately narcissism.

Instead of maturing into responsible adults who give and take from a healthy community and family, we become a bunch of whining, materialistic egotists, our inflated expectations of "selfhood" inevitably being dashed and resulting in greater and greater discontent, bitterness, and resentment.

The 1960s was the beginning of "The Great Me Project," which resulted in little islands competing against each other rather than a healthy community, which could provide the only source of our sanity--"social capital"--the sense of belonging, intimacy, and authenticity that healthy communities provide.

Absent this belonging, intimacy, and authenticity, we fear we are battling against forces by ourselves and we must also be on guard, living defensively against predators, market scams, phony politicians, and the slew of B.S. that has become so ubiquitous.

To compound our disaffected, isolated selves, our brains have become overwhelmed in the face of "Phase Two," the Technology Revolution that dizzies us with so many contraptions and messages that we have lost our grounding, our core, our focus. We don't know if we're coming or going and we feel we're about to explode.

His call for community, less materialism, and more courageous standards for moral absolutes might be too late, but at least he is still kicking and fighting.

While much of the material was familiar to me from other books, including the terse, more focused Shows About Nothing: Nihilism in Popular Culture from The Exorcist to Seinfeld by Thomas S. Hibbs and while he tries to cover too much ground as Meyer issues a diatribe about a "big menu of creepy irritations," Meyer succeeds at telling us a cohesive narrative about our popular culture to show us the trajectory leading to our current condition of learned helplessness, loneliness, partisan humbug, and mistrust.