Customer Reviews

Wild Geese and Tea

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1 star:		(3)

 

 

I bought this book on a whim since my cousins & I are at the age where we are getting married. This book may be useful if your family has been in this country for several generations or if you are not of Chinese ancestry. As a 1st generation American Born Chinese, I was hoping to ready more about the do's & don'ts - (i.e. the tea set used to serve tea for the new in-laws must be purchased by the bride, her family, or a friend.) Also, in the section about Chinese wedding banquets, she states that 'in China, 4 is a lucky number'. BAD MISTAKE. In some dialects, the pronunciation of the word four sounds like the Chinese pronunciation of DEATH. Eight is the luckiest number. I do Not recommend this book because of some mistakes and lack of interesting information.

I bought this book, or rather I picked it out and, very nicely, my boyfriend/fiance paid for it, and it was really cheesy.

A Chinese American woman wrote this book about how to gear your wedding to include some cultural aspects of one's ethnicity but the book is totally useless. She says stuff like "My fiance and I picked out invitations that had crances flying over a peaceful lake and instead of having traditional italics, we chose an ORIENTAL style of writing" First of all, Being asian is more that some cheesy cranes flying over a lake and no asian person invented that kungfu bamboo style lettering you see at take out chinese places. Also, what the heck is "oriental"? Uggh.

This person doesn't seem to know that having or doing things as an Asian or Asian American would do them involves more than an invitation with motifs based on caricatures of what non asians think represent asian culture or apeing practices from the past if you don't carry yourself and think of yourself as Asian american or asian. I mean, a yak won shik (engagement ceremony/dinner) is normal if your friends and sisters and brothers and cousins and your future kids are going to do it and it has an affinity with the past and the future in your family, but when you do it to think it will give your wedding an "Asian" flair than that is when a culture is in danger if being co-opted for the mere opportunity to dress in costume and feel that you are more asian than you think you are.

It's like thinking of a hanbok as a costume rather than as an item of clothing (albeit one that doesn't get that much use) in one's wardrobe.

I'm about halfway through and am loathe to finish the rest but I hate to let the book go to waste.

Anyway, a warning not to buy this useless, wedding industry, book.

I am ashame to know that an asian person wrote this book....that's just how bad it is. To those that rated this book with high marks: dont believe everything you read - you were duped. And by the way, unlike how the author describes the asian culture - chinese, japanese, korean, and all of the various asian ethnic groups do NOT share the same traditions.

Gives equal time to different ethnicities, and points out that the rituals and customs described are generalizations, and that customs vary from region to region. Focuses more on 1st-generation Asian-Americans, but is still useful to a 3rd-gen. Chinese-American like me. The legends, folklore, and poetry sprinkled thru-out the book are beautiful and very touching. Could use a bit more detail in places, but this book is a great place to start investigating Asian wedding traditions.