Customer Reviews

Witchery [VHS]

5 star:		(1)
4 star:		(5)
3 star:		(8)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

Witchery (1988) has gone by any number of titles over the years, including the following; Ghosthouse 2, Witchcraft, La Casa 4, Witchcraft: Return of the Exorcist, but no matter which name it's called, the plain and simple fact is it's drecky bit of horror cinema. Produced by the late Aristide Massaccesi aka Joe D'Amato (Emanuelle and the Last Cannibals, Buio Omega), who specialized in horror and softcore porn, often times featured within the same film, Witchery was directed by Fabrizio Laurenti (Troll 3). Starring in the movie is Linda Blair (The Exorcist, Chained Heat), Leslie Cumming (Zombie 5: Killing Birds), David Hasselhoff (Revenge of the Cheerleaders, Starcrash), and David Hasselhoff's perm ("Knight Rider", "Baywatch Nights"). Also appearing is Catherine Hickland ("One Life to Live"), who was married to der Hoff at the time of filming, Annie Ross (Superman III, Basket Case 2), Robert Champagne (Ghosthouse), Rick Farnsworth, Michael Manchester, and Hildegard Knef (The Lost Continent), as the mysterious and sadistic (and annoying) `lady in black'.

As the film begins we see a pregnant woman in a nightgown being chased on a beach into a deserted hotel by a handful of idiots, and given their garb, I suspect this is meant to have happened sometime in the past. This goes on for a bit until the woman meets an untimely demise as she throws herself from an upper window...which transitions into another woman named Jane Brooks (Blair), who's also pregnant, waking with a start, as it was all a dream sequence (or was it?). Now we see a couple named Leslie (Cumming) and Gary (der Hoff) arriving at the same deserted hotel as seen in the dream (it's located on a island off the coast of somewhere) as Leslie is doing research for a book about witchcraft, and Gary is along to take photos, to which the filmmakers have Hasselhoff monkeying around with a light meter, obviously knowing not how to use it, in an effort to show he's somewhat of a proficient photographer, I guess. Now we move abruptly into some scenes featuring other characters, most of who are related to Jane including her father Freddie (Champagne), mother Rose (Ross), who's a real piece of work, and her younger brother Tommy (Manchester). The gist of these scenes is to inform the viewer that Jane's seemingly wealthy parents are planning to buy the dilapidated hotel in the hopes of turning into a country club of sorts, and decide on taking the family along to check it out. Oh yeah, they also bring along an attractive, blonde architect named Linda played by Catherine Hickland, to evaluate the place. On top of everything else, there's a kooky, old woman, dressed in black (played by Knef) who pops in and out of the film, acting like she's orchestrating things to draw specific individuals to the island hotel, where she just happens to reside. Anyway, the Brooks party arrives at the hotel, with an dopey real estate agent named Jerry (Farnsworth) along for the ride (ahh, another potential victim), run into Leslie and Gary, and the bad mojo starts once they realize, through some kooky circumstances, they're all stranded on the island.

While there were a few things I liked about this feature, there was plenty more I thought wrong with the film, the main aspect, I suppose being director Laurenti's seeming inability to relate the story in a coherent manner. Perhaps I shouldn't be too critical given this was his first film, but the flow was just so uneven that it felt like he was purposely trying to confuse and obfuscate the relatively simplistic plot, which is essentially a mish mash of witchcraft and satanism. As far as the acting goes, it's pretty sad when David Hasselhoff provides one of the better performances in the film. I thought Annie Ross, as the money grubbing, nagging, snippy, too much make-up wearing matriarch, did pretty well, but her role is cut short as she's one of the first victims (she does get hers in fairly spectacular fashion). The absolute worst performance in the film comes from Leslie Cumming, who played the character Leslie, as her delivery was thoroughly monotone and her acting abilities akin to that of a dead fish. She was cute, though, and she did appear topless at one point as a sort of incubus attacks her character while she's sleeping. As far as Ms. Blair, well, she doesn't come off that well, and it's pretty obvious the filmmakers were trying to play off leech off the success of some of her other films, most notably The Exorcist (1973). I think she suffered, as did most of the others, by the sheer fact the writing was generally awful (surprisingly enough, it seemed more than adequate for der Hoff...go figure). There were a few elements about the film that made me laugh, the main one being whenever the witch would work her mojo on a particular character, she'd draw them into another dimension, one populated with weirdoes, chicken wire, and fire, by means of a cheap looking effect consisting of a red, swirly vortex with the character centered in the middle, screaming at the horrific turn of events thrust upon them by forces unknown. Another really funny bit comes as we learn Leslie's never known the pleasures of a man, and Hasselhoff's character, prior to the weirdness, tries continually to score, only to be denied (the woman truly must have had the willpower of the gods to fight the enchanting allure of der Hoff and his magnificent chest mane). The best part of the film, at least for myself, comes near the end as Hasselhoff's character goes up against the witch. I won't spoil it with details, but I will say it was very satisfying and almost made the movie worthwhile if only to witness said events. As far as the `shocker' ending, any horror film fan worth his or her salt will see it coming a mile away. All in all this is a fairly rotten film with a slight bit of nekkidness and a modest amount of gore, worth about two stars out of five, earning one extra for the bit with Hasselhoff near the end.

The picture, presented in widescreen anamorphic (1.85:1) on this Shriek Show DVD release, looks pretty clean, but doesn't appear to have been formatted correctly (at the very beginning you'll see a credit cut off). As far as the sound, it comes through well, offered up in Dolby Digital 2.0. There's not much in the way of extras offered up, as all that's included are trailers for other Shriek Show DVD release like Shadow Dead Riot (2006), Just Before Dawn (1981), A Lizard in a Woman's Skin (1971), and Devil Dog (1978). Also thrown in is a montage of a handful of trailers for films by Joe D'Amato. Normally I'm pleased with Shriek Show and their releases, but there didn't seem a whole lot of effort here, especially given the blurb on the back of the DVD case describing the characters of Gary and Linda as a couple, when, in reality, it was Gary and Leslie...perhaps it was just a mistake, but it seems like a rather large one, indicating whomever wrote the piece probably didn't actually view the film.

Cookieman108

By the way, if a body were stuffed up a chimney, don't you think it would make for an awful and highly noticeable smell once someone started a fire in the fireplace? Apparently not, according to this film...at least not for a while...

I sometimes wonder if the hacks who write copy for DVD companies actually watch the films. Here's the Plot Synopsis as quoted by Amazon:

"A pregnant woman is taken back to the house of her husband's mother."

NOT! Linda Blair is pregnant, but she's entirely unconnected to the house. And her step mother just now bought house as an investment. So Blair is not "taken back" anywhere; she was never there to begin with.

"There she begins to have strange nightmare about her child and step-family."

No she doesn't. She falls through a portal in the bathtub and sees a baby being tortured. Only Leslie Cumming's character has a nightmare, and that concerns being raped by a demon.

"For the husband and mother are actually reincarnated lovers who were burned at the stake for practicing witchcraft."

NOT! No reincarnation in this film. A present day couple are killed, but they're not related to Blair's character. And only the guy (he's single, not anyone's husband) is burned -- on a cross, not a stake. Neither is the witch who's haunting the island burned at the stake -- she jumped out a window to avoid being burned at the stake.

"She must soon escape from their clutches or have her child sacrificed to Satan."

It would be more accurate to say that the witch wants the souls of the island's visitors, so she may live again.

That said, this is a gem of a horror film. Eight people trapped on an island, whereupon the witch haunting it starts killing them, using their own Greed and Lust against them (kind of like how the seven deadly sins dispated people in the Euro-horror film, THE DEVIL'S NIGHTMARE, aka, THE DEVIL WALKS AT MIGHTNIGHT.) Several of the people fall through portals and die grisly deaths in a medieval setting.

Some interesting notes:

* This is a rare horror film in that there are TWO "good girls," the virgin Leslie Cumming, and the pregnant Linda Blair. Although this is not a slasher film, even so, with two Good Girls, the horror fan is left in suspense as to who will be the last to survive.

* This film has perhaps the worst day-for-night scenes I've ever seen. Some scenes are shot in pitch black, other scenes shot at dawn or dusk, still others with daylight pouring through the windows -- yet it's all supposed to happen at night, and we cut back and forth with the lighting switching from shot to shot. At one point the characters rush in from the pitch black night outside, and Cumming points to a bright window saying, "Look, it's no longer broken!" And we're not supposed to notice how bright it suddenly is outside!

* The boy has a Sesame Street tape recorder, and another character reads The Godfather. Yet neither Sesame Street nor The Godfather's publisher is listed in the film credits. This is refreshing, albeit rare because Hollywood studios are so paranoid that any item caught in a shot gets credited. GHOST DOG credited Tor Books because that film showed a cover of the Tor edition of Frankenstein (a public domain work). THE CAVEMAN'S VALENTINE credited the Chrysler Building for depicting the building, which is apparently a registered trademark.

WITCHERY has some cute actresses, grisly deaths (especially the chimney death -- look for it!), and spooky atmosphere. Film's a bit confusing and nonsensical (such as the link between the witch and the "Norma Desmond type" actress), but it's highly entertaining. Hard-core horror fans should love it.

I originally saw Witchery when I was a kid (I guess this was around the time it was originally released.) Scared the crap out of me LOL Very creepy and atmospheric with the black and white scenes of the witch being chased by the puritans, not to mention the torture/murder scenes. (Wait and see what happens to Annie Ross's charecter.) This film stars Linda Blair and David Hasselhoff, which strikes me as wierd him being in such a low-budget film at the height of his career. And also with the German actress Hildegard Knef as the lady in black. I have been searching for this film for quite a while with no luck, thank goodness Shriek Show has finally decided to release it. Overall this is very good to be just another cheapie horror film, sure it is cliche with the standard picking off members of the cast deal, but with the imagery this turns out to be a horror film that is actually frightining.

So far all I have seen on this movie are bad reviews... so I will set this straight. The Witchery is fantastic if what you are looking for is a horror movie. It has very few holes and it does it's job in terrifying the heck out of a person. Adult virgin Leslie (Leslie Cumming) and her boyfriend Gary (David Hasselhoff) are on an island said to be haunted by a witch collecting pictures and information for a book Leslie is writing. Meanwhile, Rose is interested in purchasing the island and the hotel to make into a club for the rich and 'important'. Along with her husband and pregnant young lady Jane (Linda Blair) and Jane's little brother Tommy they go to check out the house with a two people to get information on the house. They arrive on the island and check out the house while Leslie and Gary try to leave for fear of being caught and thought of as thieves. So far Tommy is the only one who has any contact with the mysterious 'lady in black' - which leads to the only hole in the store - Was she the actress gone insane? Or is she even more powerfully the one running the show? And even then it is not so much a hole as it was stated that the actress hid in that hotel as she did not want people to see her age... the 'lady in black' WAS looking for someone to be re-born in. Anyhow, weird things start to happen, the group decides to leave... but oh no, the boat and the driver are gone! They are stranded for the night! They meet with Leslie and Gary, but slowly the group decreases in number as they are met with many twisted and gruesome Satanic rites. Will anyone escape alive? What will happen? You'll have to watch it to find out! Beautifully chilling, I give this 4 and a half stars... the extra half star for the lovely twist ending. If you can get your hands on this movie, I highly recommend watching it.

This could have been a really good horror movie. The plot was great. The acting was horrible!! You can watch this one once but that is all. I bought it after I read these other reviews but I wish now I had rented it first. I gave it 3 stars only because of the plot.

This is the only movie I have ever seen that literally gave me nightmares for months! I even tried to watch it again a few years later and about 5 minutes into it I had to turn it off because that "Lady in Black" just gave me the creeps. This movie is great if you like satanic rituals and want to be scared to death but DO NOT LET THE KIDS watch this one!

I can't say I'm ecstatic over my purchase of this movie. Yeah, I read the reviews and decided to take a chance. Hmm, I should remind myself not to read so many reviews, especially the favorable ones.

To be fair, however, the killings were decent but not a hell of a lot made sense. Also, if it weren't for Satan being listed in the credits, I wouldn't even have known he made an appearance in the movie, and I'm still not sure who he was. The witch is convincing, though, but her skin looks like it's melting. Old age I guess. I have to say this is going to be one of those films that's going to be categorized as "it had potential" and that's about it. Rent before you buy this one.

Now, as far as the video quality goes, Media Blasters/Shriek Show did a very good job. The colors were for the most part solid, even though there was some fine grain which ran throughout the movie. There was also some obvious print damage but not enough to distract. It's obvious someone didn't do a great job taking care of the negatives. In fact, when you watch the trailer of the movie, there's a short message that comes on beforehand apologizing to the viewer that the trailer was not in the very best condition when Media Blasters got it, so they want you to know that in case you get shocked by the low quality of the video. Honestly, it wasn't that bad. I've seen worse.

So, it's up to you if you're going to lay down the cash. But, you've been warned!

This may be the worst movie I've seen since Manos, Hands of Fate. Yet I can't rate it poorly purely due to shlock value. When I heard there was an 80's horror flick with Linda Blair AND David Hasselhoff I had to see it! As another reviewer said, when the Hoff is the best thing in a picture, you've got something pretty special. Unfortunately Linda Blair was underused and the 80's cheese was non-existent.

The plot makes no sense. There's no reason given to anything that happens except that Witchcraft is involved somehow. It's German Witchcraft at that, which again makes no sense except a German actress was hired to play the witch and I guess her accent had to be explained. I'm glad someone here explained the pregnant woman in the beginning was being chased by Puritans. That makes a little more sense than what I first thought since the Puritans kind of looked like Mexican banditos chasing the woman through an Old West town. I couldn't figure out what all that had to do with an island outside Boston. There's also a tiny subplot with a little girl in a wheelchair that has no purpose, except if you think girls in wheelchairs are creepy I guess.

The acting, especially by the supporting cast, is outlandishly bad. Usually you have to watch broad comedies satirizing bad acting to see such poor line readings. The actress playing the Hoff's girlfriend either had a speech impediment or was heavily medicated for most of the shoot. She slurred her lines so badly she was often unintelligible. Too bad she was supplying what little exposition there is.

The special effects reminded me of low budget, 70's tv shows on par with something like Shazaam. People mention the constant shifts from day to night within scenes. Instead, I enjoyed the "violent storm" and "killer waves" the characters kept refering to which kept everyone trapped on the island. I guess the budget didn't allow for people to wait around for an actual storm to occur, or even stock footage, because every shot showed clear skies and calm seas.

Unfortunately, even the cheese doesn't stop the movie from getting very slow and boring about 2/3's through and then you just can't wait for it to end. The filmmakers also seemed bored because the ending is very abrupt with no great payoff or satisfaction. Still a disaster of this proportion seems to necesitate the MST3K gang to be dragged back to work in order to skewer it.

Out of desperation I will buy this dvd. Unfourtuantly, it is only rated R. I saw this movie years ago as a child and it really crawled under my skin, that version was uncut. Although I have high expectations in seeing this movie once more I feel that the jucy scenes will be cencored, which blows. But maybe down the road they'll release the uncut version.

This is one of about a dozen Italian-American co-produced "La Casa" or "Witch/Ghost House" movies made in the later 1980's (after the success of HOUSE with William Katt) and seeming to draw their inspiration from AMITYVILLE HORROR + the excellent SUPERSTITION/THE WITCH by director James Roberson. See Umberto Lenzi's GHOSTHOUSE ("La Casa 3"), the twisted WITCH STORY/SUPERSTITION 2 and Lucio Fulci's all-out Italian SODOMA'S GHOST for more examples: WITCHERY would have been "La Casa 4". The plots are universal & interchangable: A group of seemingly random people gather at a secluded, abandoned house that was the site of (or built on land where) some horrifying event centuries/decades past and suffer the vengeance of a ghost/witch who unleashes her fury in the form of barbaric, torturous killings staged with the usual Italian flair for theatrics.

This is one of the more commercially appealing, with an excellent Massachussets coastal setting, camp value in the presence of not only Linda Blair as a possessed daughter of Satan, but a pre-BAYWATCH David Hasslehoff along with his then-squeeze Catherine Hickland. Some dynamite gore sequences and a nasty Satanic ritual orgy with a goober faced Beelzebub who looks like Marilyn Manson after overdosing on Yoohoo shakes round it out as a great little slice of American horror as seen by Italians. Joe D'amato of ANTHROPOPHAGUS and PORNO HOLOCAUST fame is credited as producer, so you know to expect slick, sleazy, vouyeristic content with a dash of exploitation trash to boot, and WITCHERY delivers ... You can even go to the amazon.uk sister site and find a passable Region 2 PAL DVD release under the Europe title WITCHCRAFT (make sure you have the right kind of DVD player first!!), and interestingly the two versions have slightly different content, namely an opening flashback sequence that is shortened on the North American video.

But they are more or less the same and anyone reading this will be well-served by one of the videos listed for sale here, try to score the "Vidmark" VHS version, it plays back at the superior SP mode & has excellent picture qiality. And like Umberto Lenzi's GHOSTHOUSE this was probably a 4:3 open matte shoot meaning that it would be "cropped" to 1:85 for widescreen theatrical showings, so a fullframe presentation even on VHS is an accurate way to watch the film as it was originally intended. I recommend it to anyone who likes 80's horror or Italian shockers, keep your expectations low & it will satisfy.