Customer Reviews

An Unknown Woman

5 star:		(11)
4 star:		(5)
3 star:		(0)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(1)

 

 

Steady as she goes. As a male reading this book, I was struck by the fact that so many consider this a "women's book." No way. This is a great book for ** anyone ** wanting a glimpse inside a solitary life. Ms. Koller's vivid telling of living alone with her dog (Logos) is truly remarkable. If you ever begin to feel lonely and isolated from life, as if you are "outside the circle," pick up this book and read how being alone doesn't have to mean lonely. No, this book is not a book for women, this is a book for anyone with a beating heart and a curiosity of a wonderful life lived alone. Alice Koller is one stable and balanced individual - great book!

Thirtysomething Alice Koller looked in the mirror and didn't recognize the face she saw. Feeling the urgent need to reassess her life, she saved up enough money to spend several months in a secluded house in Nantucket. Her only companion was her puppy, Logos. Faced with solitude, she began the challenging task of dissecting who she was and deciding who she wanted to become. She found that her adult self was not that much different from the child who so desperately sought her mother's attention and affection. She finds her difficulty with jobs and men have their roots in her early conflict with her mother. She emerges clear-sighted and independent: "I don't need anyone to tell me what I'm like, what I do well, what I ought to try. I know who I am a little bit more each day." Through writing and vigorous soul searching she comes to realize this. And the reader will share in her ultimate triumph.

I loved this book. I stumbled upon it accidentally and it was not at all what I expected. It is insightful and so well-written that you feel you are with her on both her actual journey and her inward one.

to the critic Inna I think another significant fact is before this book there were very few ordinary women who wrote about the individual woman's journey to find her true self. The writing may not be elegant but it's more important that she had the courage to tell her story. Why does it haunt so many readers like me? There is something magic in the way she tells her story so who cares about literary elegance here! If she helps others on their journeys or to begin their journeys she has left behind a great gift. Again, thank you Alice wherever you are.

I read this book over and over again. I bought it in 1988 ! just because I felt I needed a guide how to discover your own manner, inner feelings and learn to be a more solide person. AND the book helped me. And I still come to parts that gives me something new to think about. maybe this book was just the right book ( kind of bible) for women born in the 40:ies. Anyway it is a book I recomend with all my heart! Read it , feel it, think of it and learn from it.

Koller's book has been a favorite book to give. And, a favorite in my personal collection. The author takes us from her decision to get to know herself, through casting off form to discover her substance, and the results of her winter "off" journey for a private retreat on Nantucket Island. I marked my first copy with "lightbulbs" as her one-liners hit me between the eyes: Unloading her car, she noticed the lovely sunset, and thought she'd hurry to 'catch it.' She then realized there was no reasn to keep working and miss the moment. Where did she learn to "finish your work, first?" etc. Ah ha! A light went off! Great reading. And a true story. If you loan it, track it!

I've just finished rereading this courageous and deeply personal journey, and it's still lingering with me as I type this review. I wasn't in the same mindset the first time I picked up the book many years ago, therefore I felt a bit on the peripheral in identifying with Alice. I have since embarked on my own soulful expedition that's lasted several years thus far, and I've come to realize that to truly find my inner core, it must be done alone and it must often be a raw, painful process. I don't let "them" tell me it isn't. It's not for the weak willed, and certainly not for the person who NEEDS people to survive. I have reached many of the revelations that Alice achieved, and they were hard won battles indeed, but am convinced worth it in the end. Alice's message, and my own experience, is to give in to the the power to BE! For me, it's rejoicing in the most basic aspects of being alive when the veil of despair darkens my vision - the ability to take deep cleansing breaths, the range of graceful motion my physicality allows me, exploring my inner universe, quietly surveying my surroundings, loving my animal companion, trusting the ability to take care of myself, and knowing that nothing in this life is etched in stone, except my demise. I've taught myself to pay closer attention to the way I interact with others and, surprisingly to me, there's a compassion I didn't realize was there, and wouldn't have had I not undertaken this private excavation. Alice, I hope you're still among us. Thank you!

I'm a reading freak, I literally own hundreds of books, most all of them literature and serious non-fiction. This book, and Alice Koller's second memoir, The Stations of Solitude, are two of my favorite books of all time. It's just that they're not exactly like any other books I've read. Both memoirs are of a single woman's excruciatingly sane, solitary life, beautifully described in minute, banal detail. She wrote An Unknown Woman years ago, but both books can still actually teach people to have the courage to live a real, sincere life and make their own choices, simply by the example she puts forth. However, the thing I love the most about them is that they don't pretend to be interesting, witty or dramatic. In the Stations she describes how she manages, or survives, all kinds of mundane stresses and ordinary grief--- how she deals with having no money, finding jobs, looking for places to live. How she lives in her car in a state forest for a while. How she mourns the death of her dog. How she loves of the beauty of some piece of furniture! I just can't say enough good things about these books. They are written by someone who wrote about her life as she experienced it firsthand, who used her own experiences, even of things that are considered ordinary, as the basis for her work and philosophy. Her books have a complete lack of pop psychology, or 'the experts say...' mentality that seems so prevalent today. I know it sounds cliche, but they are totally refreshing.

This book was amazingly comforting and fascinating. The author lets you in on the simple intimate details of her life on a sparsely populated vacation Island in winter. Gradually she becomes more and more intimate with herself as she faces her life squarely and the grief and frustration she feels over her career path and the failures of her romantic relationships. She finds joy in nature and love in a wonderful relationship with her devoted puppy. And most of all she confirms herself and gradually begins out of the ashes of her former life - to fashion a new life that is more honest and true to herself.
SO many of us fill our lives with pursuits that don't deliver what we'd hope for, or relationships that disapoint. But how much time do we set aside to really spend alone with ourselves, to get to know what we really need and want in life? I think Alice did this and did it well and wrote about it to share her path with us.
A tender but rugged tale of an inspiring journey. I loved it!

I am currently finishing An Unknown Woman for the second time. This time was even more useful than the first - which was many years ago. I dug deep into the box hidden at the back of the closet for what I knew would help me in my current internal journey. Yes, there is much about her dog Logos. But like a good movie, the characters must be developed before they can mean anything in the epiphany. I love the process of how she deconstructs her patterns and thoughts to get to some source of each one of them, following a thread until it leads her to a place of realization. And only the realization can stop the process. Along the way I did some deconstructing of myself and developed once again a pattern of looking at my choices that is actually helpful in revealing my own truths hidden under the daily machinations which cover it all up. It is hard to be true to yourself. I am glad to have books like this that continue to aid me in my journey to be free.