Customer Reviews

A Woman of Independent Means

5 star:		(28)
4 star:		(7)
3 star:		(4)
2 star:		(4)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

I just finished this book, of which I could not put down for a moment. It is an excellent read! I cried several times throughout the book. I was amazed by this woman, Bess. She was the obvious life-force behind her marriage and family. She always asked questions and made comments about life that were ahead of its time...classic...timeless! She was such a progressive thinker for her time.
The letters spanned from the beginning of the 20th century to the 1940s. Time and time again she surprised me with her observations and decisions: We should just do, instead of waiting for something to happen, since the future is unknown. She commented about philosophical concepts that many of us ponder today. Her thoughts on children-rearing were so refreshing too; that we shouldn?t lose ourselves in our children; that raising children doesn't necessarily mean one has to make it her sole occupation.
Her perception of life was so positive, even in the face of so many unbelievable tragedies. She treated death like an enemy, which forced her to live her life to the fullest. A very interesting, positive, way to look at things, especially in an age where a lot of us have become complacent about death. Her question about why society expects us to spend our lifetime of experiences with one person, is one that I'm sure many of us ask ourselves today! She sees the complexities of people and of life in general, which makes her so understanding, and so tolerant. Even her subtle way of introducing social change is brilliant, leaving a lasting impression. It was inspiring to read those letters, and reminded me of how important writing is...so much more thought goes into words when one writes them down. The written word can often be so much more powerful than words which are spoken.
It occurred to me that this book was written in 1978, which may explain why there's so much progressive thought here. However, history shows us that many women felt the way Bess felt. It was so thrilling for me to read these letters, imagining the setting of America in the 20s, 30s and 40s.
Most importantly though, I believed in this character. I felt for her deeply and her letters really moved me. Her life was astonishing...a wonderful read. I would recommend this book to every mother, daughter, grandmother...and every father, son and grandfather for that matter!

I read A WOMAN OF INDEPENDENT MEANS when it first was published, and it stayed with me for all these years.

When I recently re-read the book, I found its message timeless. In part because the novel always was a period piece, it doesn't show any age.

The heroine, Bess, could be a model for all women. Yet she also proves (if one needs proof) how empowering money can be. Because she is written as, indeed, "a woman of independent means," she has an easier time making life choices than those who are not independent would have--and this was even more true in the era in which the story is set.

Elizabeth Forsythe Hailey's structure of letters is amazing. To have told such a complicated story only in the form of correspondence is a feat rarely matched. In fact, I think that Sandra Dallas's novel THE DIARY OF MATTIE SPENSER, in which an equally complicated story unfolds in diary entries, is the only challenger for this kind of technique.

Read this! Bess will become your friend forevermore.

This wonderfully sensitive book has been a cherished possession since the late 70's when I was fortunate enough to have Ms. Hailey autograph my copy. Since, I have given this book to countless friends, old and young. I saw Barbara Rush brilliantly perform this one woman play adapted from the book and took all my friends to that also. Then thoroughly enjoyed the miniseries on NBC with Sally Field.

Currently, I am producing this play as a benefit for my local Women's Center in Coeur d'Alene Idaho. It will play in a small intimate theater Feb. 18, 19, 20.

I obviously love the book, the play, the message. Women everywhere are inspired to exhibit strength and independence with softness, grace and humor. Buy this for your daughters and granddaughters. Then, get the play produced in your town as a benefit for a local Women's Center or other agency that reaches out and supports women.

Any literary piece that is as relevant after 20+ years as it was the day it was written is pretty amazing!

I, too, found this book gripping, but for a far different reason than many previous reviewers. The chronicle of Bessie Steed (for whom low self-esteem will never have been an issue), is written from her own point of view. But this is not a diary, honest and reflective -- no, this is her correspondence: the persona that she crafts for presentation to the world.

Nevertheless, her collected letters reveal to the attentive reader a woman awash in obliviousness regarding her effect on her family and friends. Those she loves are overpowered as she tries to do the best thing for them (i.e. make sure her wishes for them are accomplished). The subtlety of the author's writing allows us to see the terrifying effects of this lovely and charming personification of the iron hand in the velvet glove. Eventually, we receive hints that reality may be bubbling through to our heroine, but she can barely admit it to herself, let alone to us. We love her, resent her and pity her.

Masterful.

This is quite simply an amazing book. It follows one woman's entire life through the letters that she writes to others. This woman is not always a role model, not always nice, but always human. She lives, suffers, triumphs, expresses opinions and evolves as we read on. I have recommended this book to my friends, parents and boyfriend and all have loved it! Insightful, inspiring, a look into one woman's ordinary life. A must-read!

The first time I read Elizabeth Forsythe Hailey's A Woman of Independent Means I was a sophomore in high school and read it with other members of our book club. At the time I greatly enjoyed the book. Trying to relax my brain from school work I picked it up again the other afternoon but found the book a bit more problematic on the second reading. Hailey wanted to write a book about a woman finding her independence and as her husband assured her that a woman going out to find her independence was a dried up story line he encouraged her to write a book about a woman finding her independence within a domestic setting. The book is largely based off of her grandmother, in epistolary format, and takes place from 1899 to 1968.

If A Woman of Independent Means is meant to achieve an understanding of a woman in a domestic setting and her independence I fear it fails greatly. The main character Elizabeth has two marriages, which both are largely unhappy and the only money she has is a result of her mother's death and the fact that another man made financial decisions for her even though they were against her wishes. She does travel abroad a lot, which seems to imply that a woman cannot find independence within a domestic setting. She has three children who in later life reject her for smothering them (though amends are made before she dies) and she never really seems to do anything. An interesting read but quite the damming story of the domestic experience.

I picked this book up two nights ago, and couldn't let go of it until I'd read every last word. I adore epistolary novels, and this is an especially good one. Bess begins in the fourth grade at the turn of the last Century and continues through to 1968 in a series of letters to family members and friends.

Throughout these letters she displays her frailties, her faults, her neuroses and her need to control her surroundings (sometimes to her own detriment). The inclination to make decisions for adult family members, and then express surprise at their lack of grace in accepting these decisions, is one of the most telling aspects of this lady's character.

There were at least two sequences that made me cry (not a usual occurrence for me) and when the book was finished, I felt almost depressed that I would no longer be able to "live" with Bess and her family. That is the mark of a truly enjoyable book - the deep regret one feels when it ends.

This book is all 'letters'. When I gave a first glance to the book, I was quite doubtful about how much will the book be able to contain my interest. I thought it might be like a diary book ..like 'The Pillow Book of Sei Shonagan' by Ivan Morris or 'The Book of Disquiet' by Fernando Pessoa but just without the 'To' and 'From' Address.
Surely reading letters is faster than reading diary excerpts. Seeking complex books I just forgot how even simple act of writing everyday things and events in a letter can make a good reading. Since its letters, the focus is on whats being said and there's no need for the reader to see if the character has been written well or how's the style.
And again its not just a log of daily events, as Elizabeth comes up with these profound realisations which happen so sporadically in our lives and can be caught on paper only when they are written down as and when they happen ,like in these letters.
Its a nice book to compare the 'diary' form of writing and the 'letter' form of writing. Teachers have always encouraged the good habit of writng a diary. Now I feel letter writing should be equally encouraged.

This book was originally a gift from one of my oldest and dearest friends. She choose it by name alone to describe me. The only thing nice my mother was ever able to say about the book, was at least I'm not manipulating as Bess is. She is strength, grace and oh the furniture! I could never be so brave, forceful and full of courage. She is a strong woman, who should be shown to all young women. I have passes this book on to many friends and last christmas it was returned to me. I have just re-read it while on vacation. It has been ten years since I first met Bess, and boy have we both grown! Please pass this one on to all of your friends.

Bess Steed, the book's main character, embodies the type of feminist who has been sligthly lost in the feminist movement. She shows remarkable strength and fortitude in the face of adversity, while upholding and celebrating the important notion that to be 'traditionally' feminine has retained its beauty over time. This is a book you can give your grandmother to thank her, your mother to discuss with, and your daughter as you help her to grow.