Customer Reviews

The Women Who Raised Me: A Memoir

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Five MOVING Stars!! Notable TV actress ("Diagnosis Murder" and "The Young and The Restless") Victoria Rowell has written a moving memoir of her life, which stands as a testament to the power of love above all else. But mainly it is an appreciation of the woman who gave birth to her and those women who raised her. Many fans will be shocked to learn she was a ward of the state of Maine for years. Her father, whom she never met, was black and her white mother, whom she only met a few times, was descended from the Mayflower group, which makes Victoria a member of the 13th generation of that notable original group. She spends considerable time in the Prologue going over her lineage on her mother's side of the family, and she and her daughter take a trip back in time, examining their family roots in Maine. The trip with her daughter to the gravesite and her solo trip to Augusta are very emotional. The book primarily covers "the many surrogate mothers, grandmothers, aunts, fosterers, mentors, grande dames, and sisters who were as much in my blood as was my own blood-the women who raised me." These were some truly amazing and caring women who opened their hearts and homes to her.

This book clearly shows us that, besides the bad things we often hear, good things can come from foster parenting and adoption. In her case, it did 'take a village' to raise her. In that regard, Victoria's life is a sterling example of both individual determination and unselfish support from others. And, not content to walk away with her fame, she has made adoption a cause in her life through the "Rowell Foster Children's Positive Plan". Beyond that, I really like her writing style. And after all that happened, the beautiful Ms Rowell can still say to herself and to the world, about a mother she only saw three times: her mother loved her. And Ms Rowell's extraordinary efforts to see her mother the third time proves she also loved her mom. Caution: many emotional moments ahead! Highly Recommended! Five INSPIRING Stars!

(Note: this review is based on an unabridged digital download in secure eReader format.)

While some readers and/or reviewers may take great pains to dissect Rowell's descriptions of her biological mother--and various foster mothers and mentors--I will avoid the unnecessary recounting of every detail of these remarkable women. Needless to say, the venerable and undaunted Black farm owner Agatha Armstead, Rowell's long-term foster mother, receives considerable and much deserved attention in this book. (The "Agatha" Award is named for Armstead and given annually by Rowell's nonprofit organization The Rowell Foster Children Positive Plan.) Yet there may be some readers who may have difficulty understanding the author's obvious need to elevate and illuminate her biological schizophrenic White mother, Dorothy Rowell.

With no contradictions, the author's real and literary attempt at exposing, explaining, and claiming her biological mother is stunningly African-American; less than a handful of us Black folks can claim any kind of racial purity due to our slave past--a past shaped as much by sexual exploitation and the occasional breaking of social and legal codes that proscribed interracial relations, as by the exploitation of labor. Both old and new Black American literature, like Black American life, is filled to the brim with accounts of unknown and unnamed ancestors, many of whom did not arrive from Africa; most of whom were not anxious to claim their darker relatives. This memoir is a 20th and 21st century story as old as Black America itself.

For persons who are visibly and culturally Black, yet who have a White parent, shaping an identity can be visceral and defiantly individual. Yet our long dead Black ancestors did exactly what Rowell does in this book--they claimed what they knew, and embraced the people they needed to embrace to give themselves a sense of history, belonging, and community. Without a full family history, the author can only tell us what she knows about her biological family tree; and like the ancestors of old, it is a fragmented and painful account. Like many an orphaned slave child, the foster child in this book claimed family wherever she found it. Her search for family and a sense of belonging ripples through this book and is set to life through her crisp and conversational prose. The women who raised her are family by their actions and by her acclamation.

Readers looking for an autobiography of titillating personal details will not find it here. The author delves deep enough into her childhood, young adult, and relatively recent life experiences. Yet she essentially keeps her focus on the array of women who have mothered and mentored her. That is, of course, the power of this text. All of her mothers come across as ordinary women who rose to the extraordinary and often painful task of foster parenting a child that they knew they might have been unable to keep. Rowell leaves no mentor unmentioned, giving readers the rare opportunity to contemplate all of the unsung women in their own lives who have "raised" them. The beauty of this book is the realization that all of these women are women any one of us might meet anywhere.

Rowell has long been an advocate and voice for children in foster care. She has tirelessly encouraged ordinary folks to become foster parents and mentors; and has often opened her own home to foster parents and children. She adds to that stellar legacy with this book. Her literary accomplishment, however, is that she pulls this off without excessive melodrama or moralizing. All at once you weep, and all at once you celebrate. You empathize, but do so without pity. I highly recommend this work and look forward to the next.

Victoria Rowell is a gorgeous woman and brilliant actress (having had starring roles in both Diagnosis Murder and The Young and the Restless). Her book shows how hard she had to work to earn her success, how deeply she appreciates everyone who helped her along the way, and how dedicated she is to helping others ... clearly, as beautiful inside as outside.

Ms. Rowell's mother was a lily white Mayflower descendent and schizophrenic, and her father an unknown Black man. Ms. Rowell was a foster child from infancy until adulthood -- but never stopped loving her mother or appreciating each of her foster parents, and everyone else who tried to help her. She has been through MUCH more than most of us can even imagine, yet remains upbeat and grateful for every shred of kindness, and determined to help other foster children (for whom she founded a charitable foundation).

Victoria Rowell is truly remarkable, and her book is awesome. In addition to learning about this wonderful celebrity, reading it should give hope to foster children, inspiration to foster parents, and an awakening to everyone else, apprising us of the problems encountered by foster children (e.g., being dumped on the street at age 18, which seems unconscionable since many have not even graduated from high school yet), and what we can do to help.

HIGHEST POSSIBLE RECOMMENDATION!

Victoria Rowell, film and television actress, chronicles her life as a foster child in her memoir, The Women Who Raised Me: A Memoir. Rowell was the product of a blue-vein, old money Caucasian mother, whose family were Mayflower descendants, and an unknown black man. Her mother, Dorothy Collins, suffered from mental illness exhibiting schizophrenia. There were six children, three boys and three girls, all from different fathers. When Rowell was three months-old she was taken in as a foster child by Bertha Taylor, who wanted to adopt her but was not allowed to because of the state of Maine's statutes regarding interracial adoption. Little Vicki was only two years-old when she was taken away from her and placed in the home of a black woman, Agatha Wooten Armistead. Her two older sisters, also, both biracial, were taken in by Agatha.

Under Agatha's care, Rowell thrived in a loving, extended family in rural Maine. Bertha came from a family of formidable women with austere backgrounds. Agatha encouraged Rowell's love of dance and purchased a how-to book so that when she had her first audition at eight years-old, though she was self-taught, her natural talent netted a scholarship to a prestigious dance program. At age 17, she received a scholarship to ABT, American Ballet Theater, thus starting an illustrious career that would lead her into modeling, commercials and eventually television, most notably an actress on The Young and the Restless and Diagnosis: Murder.

Along the way, Rowell had an on again, off again relationship with her mother, Dorothy, who finally died in 1983. She also had other temporary and foster mothers of various backgrounds before she became an emancipated minor. Each of these women left something precious with her that she treasures to this day. Rowell married in her mid-twenties and had a daughter and later had a son with Wynton Marsalis. Marsalis's mother also became a role model and mentor as well as Latonya Jackson, wife of Samuel L. Jackson, as did other women who came into her life. But it was a turning point in 2002, that caused Rowell to retreat and reassess her life. That is when she also began to research her background which was the beginning of her life story.

Part family history, memoir and inspirational guide, Rowell gave a credible account of the racial and social history of Maine, the story of her childhood navigating the foster care system, of the women who were so vital in her growing years, learning to love and accept herself and the monumental act of forgiveness--of herself and others. I met Rowell last fall when she was promoting her book in Oakland and she struck me as a warm, down-to-earth woman who is fiercely dedicated to her cause, foster care rights and her love of the arts. Though the middle of the book moved a little slow, I recommend to those who enjoy memoirs and stories of perseverance.

Dera R. Williams
APOOO BookClub

"Acting is what I do, not who I am," was a quote by Ms Rowell at a recent book-signing in Seattle. To know Victoria is to catch a fleeting glimpse of a 'work in progress'; mother, activist,humanitarian, ballerina, actress, historian, collector of antiques, mentor... As expressed in her memoir, The Women Who Raised Me, she credits, in beautiful, glowing prose her profound connections with the foster mothers(and others) who raised her and inculcated her with the values of hard work, pursuit of truth and beauty, faith and commitment that have been a mainstay throughout her extraordinary life. A stunningly intimate portrait and a soul-searching account of her private search for her own mother, Dorothy. It will touch your heart and cause you to re-evaluate your own connections and relationships and perhaps... make you a little more human and aware in the process. BRAVO! A great book. Highest Recommendation. *****

A very touching story , well written and informative. So sad at times. I loved that there were pictures of these incredible women to put faces on the heroes! Inspiring too, that with love and guidance, our children can thrive in difficult life situations.
As a grandmother to a mixed race child, very distubing also, that we still have so far to go in the US.

I could not put down Ms. Rowell's life journey. I knew very little about her, only that she was an actress in a soap opera. She is an incredibly strong woman. I have great admiration for her. She could so easily have turned her back on her painful past and distanced herself from orphans; but she chose not to. She embraces her birth mother and all who assisted her.

In a splendid and glorious memorializing of a company of women who contributed to her growth, opportunities and eventual success, Victoria Rowell has created a grand gesture of epic proportions.

Her story, told with grace and honesty, reveals the multi-layered character she became as a result of the fostering and mentoring she received...as she describes it, like the piecing together of a quilt.

In successive foster homes in the state of Maine, from infancy, Victoria Rowell sets an example of triumph over adversity. Despite the early deprivation of a "biological mother", she grew in a positive direction through experiences that many would find challenging, at the very least. And yet, with the help of her foster mothers and mentors, social workers and others along the way, she faced every challenge, excelling as a ballet dancer and later as an actress, a mother, and then as a creator of her own network of support for foster youth by founding the Rowell Foster Children's Positive Plan and serving as a spokesperson for the Annie E. Casey Foundation/Casey Family Services.

While in LA recently, attending Book Expo America, I had the pleasure of meeting Ms. Rowell while signing copies of her book. I felt very honored to be in her presence for a brief time and want to congratulate her on her many accomplishments, including this wonderful book.

Watching Victoria grow from her early days on Y&R & loving her acting/ballet ability made me want to learn more about this beautiful young lady. I am more impressed then ever. Victoria has the uncanny ability to express herself in every way possible. When it comes to reading, this book is a must!

i really liked the fact Victoria gives reconition to the women who helped shape her life and the fact that she took a lot of negetives and turned them into positives i actually ienjoyed reading this book.