Write More Good: An Absolutely Phony Guide [Paperback]

The Bureau Chiefs (Author), Roger Ebert (Foreword)

Book Description

Release date: April 5, 2011

Still clinging to your dog-eared dictionary? So attached to The Elements of Style that you named your rabbits Strunk and White? Maybe you’re a beleaguered reporter, or a type-A newspaper reader who unwinds by e-mailing the editor about whether “tweet” is a verb?

It’s time to face up to reality: Writing clearly, checking facts, and correcting typos are dying arts. Whether you’re a jaded producer of media or a nitpicking consumer of it, this book will help you to embrace, not resist, the lowering of standards for the written word!

Part dictionary, part journalism textbook, part grammar and writing manual, Write More Good is a “comprehensive” “guide” to today’s “media,” in all its ambulance-chasing, story-fabricating, money-hemorrhaging glory. (LEGAL DISCLAIMER: The authors are not responsible for consequences that may result from actually using this book as a dictionary, textbook, or grammar and writing manual.)

Let The Bureau Chiefs, the ritin’ and reportin’ geniuses behind the Twitter phenomenon @FakeAPStylebook, teach you about:

* Proper usage!
“World War” should be used only for conflicts involving countries on at least three continents. For large-scale battles against clones, killer tomatoes, or a fifty-foot woman, use “attack” instead.

* Entertainment Journalism!
When writing about a celebrity for an online audience, save your readers time by linking directly to nude photos of him or her.

* Science Reporting!
When writing about those robots that seek out and consume houseflies for energy, the parenthetical aside “(OH GOD, WE’RE DOOMED!)” is implied and is therefore not necessary to include in your story.

And much, much, more!

Editorial Reviews

Review

“The book in my hands just might be the least useful writing aid ever compiled…But then, of course, that’s exactly the point…Pull[s] apart words and sentences with a strange blend of cleverness and sophomoric humor…A lot of writers and editors have little reason to laugh these days; thank goodness we’ve got something here.”
—NewYorker.com

"Anyone who has ever searched for le mot juste will laugh — what's the word? — hysterically...Write More Good makes the death of journalism funnier than it has any right to be (while potentially hastening it along)."
—NPR

"Succeeds both as one funny book and also as a crash course in how to get fired from any job requiring you to submit writing for publication...Readers who enjoy humor in the vein of The Onion will love this book, a kind of unholy love child of William Strunk Jr. and E.B. White's The Elements of Style and The Daily Show...For those who like their humor with a little bite."
—Library Journal (starred review)

"It’s a brain-exploding mix of Dave Barry meets Borowitz meets the original AP Stylebook, and while the results aren’t always pretty, they are pretty funny."
—Tom Chandler, The Writer Underground

"Write More Good aims to embrace the lowering standards of the written word. It's so funny I could cry."
—Chron.com (Houston Chronicle)

“I would like to praise the authors for not doing what anyone else in the Internet Age would have done, which is simply cutting and pasting together a slew of tweets, calling it a book, and raking in the dough from Old Media.”
—Roger Ebert

“Write More Good is your AP Stylebook unshaven and hungover after the latest round of media layoffs. Editors, writers, and sticklers will enjoy the satire, but the poop jokes are for everyone.”
—Jeff Deck, coauthor of The Great Typo Hunt: Two Friends Changing the World, One Correction at a Time
 
“You can read Write More Good simply for laughs: Its expanded hits of @FakeAPStylebook wit and humor will have you reading it aloud to cubicle neighbors. But if you aspire to truly great writing—whether you’re a hopeful author, a professional editor, or a celebrity who just pays someone—well, you’re definitely going to need a different book.”
—Carol Fisher Saller, author of The Subversive Copy Editor

About the Author

THE BUREAU CHIEFS count among their number journalists, artists, a librarian,
an English professor, even a lawyer (affirmative action!). Ken Lowery and Mark
Hale are the founders of the Twitter feed @FakeAPStylebook, which they and the
Bureau Chiefs update several times a day.

Product Details

• Paperback: 272 pages
• Publisher: Three Rivers Press (April 5, 2011)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0307719588
• ISBN-13: 978-0307719584
• Product Dimensions: 5.2 x 0.6 x 8 inches
• Shipping Weight: 5.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (16 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #206,350 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

22 of 26 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars The El Santo of Writing Guides. April 5, 2011

By John J. Nevins

Format:Paperback

In her TRANSGRESSIVE GRAMMAR Valerie Greenberg writes that "Transgressing grammar boundaries is a subversive undertaking since it is likely to violate the sanctuaries of accepted modes of expression. Among the most fortified boundaries have been those between the proper grammar and writers."

The pseudonymous and possibly fictional members of The Bureau Chiefs, who may or may not be members of a cabal of sinister brains in a jar, have little but contempt for the Greenbergs of the world. in the view of The Bureau Chiefs, grammar, syntax and usage were put there for a reason, young lady, and so you should leave them alone. No, you heard me the first time. Leave them alone. Do it, young lady, or we're going home right now.

Sadly, too many new writers follow Greenberg's lead and are dedicated to transgressing boundaries, both through the daring application of a tattoo to the small of their back and through the subversive use of willfully incorrect spelling, grammar, and syntax. Too many new writers think, because Henry James was an O.G. pimp hustler when it came to usage, that they, too, can flaunt the rules with no more regard for them than for the poor television commercials they fast forward through on their way to the next segment of My Little Pony.

Thank heavens for The Bureau Chiefs! They have finally taken a stand against the nonsense that has taken hold of the writerly world since 1894. They have finally said, "Enough! The line is drawn...here!"

Thanks to WRITE MORE GOOD, anyone, from a bored six year old to middle aged bloggers, can learn how to write pellucid prose so clean you could eat off it and so professional that even Eustace Tilley would embrace it, weeping.

The book also cleared up my Treponema pallidum. But that may have just been coincidence.

12 of 13 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars This is a great parody of the "style guide" for writing... lots of laughs on every page... April 5, 2011

By Thomas Duff HALL OF FAMETOP 500 REVIEWERVINE™ VOICE

Format:Paperback

As a writer, there are certain "rules" you're supposed to follow in terms of style. Even if you're not a writer, you're affected by these styles as they dictate what you read in media stories. A couple of guys decided to take some liberties with those guidelines and created a Twitter account named fakeapstylebook to parody the rules, and that led to this book... Write More Good: An Absolutely Phony Guide by The Bureau Chiefs. If you've ever had to write an article for some publication (and you have a sense of humor), this is a great parody that offers plenty of laughs and hits close to the truth on more than one occasion.

Contents:
News & Headline Writing & You & Journalism
Politics: When The Horse Race Lasts 30 Months
Entertainment: The Glitz, The Glamour, The Death of the Superego
Sex: Ew
Religion
Sports: The Sport of Kings
The Shiny Money Box, Or, Technology and the Death of All Paper
Science (and the Blinding By Thereof)
Pseudoscience and the Supernatural: Ya Rly
Weapons and the Military: Shoot First, Then Ask Questions About Shooting
Citation and Attribution: Do Not Hit the Snooze Button
Punctuation and Grammar: LOL
Media Law: You Are So Screwed
The Morgue: The Dead Live!
The Ghost of Basics Past
Glossary

Each chapter starts out with a few snide comments about the topic, slides into the "basics" along with related detail that spares nothing and no one, and then ends with a topic glossary that is far more interesting than any other glossary you've ever read. Do you want to be an entertainment writer? Learn how to become a blogging review quote machine so you'll get free tickets and videos! Sports writer? Get a nickname and a stance, and then market yourself shamelessly!

But there are always things to remember... For instance, if you're a sports writer, remember that professional bowlers should never be referred to as "heavy-set." It's assumed. If you're writing about soccer for North American audiences, remember to consider the fact that no one cares. And of course, any story on Brett Favre's retirement should end with the ;) emoticon.

What I found impressive about this book (and which was also pointed out by Roger Ebert in the forward) is that it's not a book composed solely of tweets from the authors. Too often a book based on a blog or Twitter account is just a compilation of the same material that's already been used. Fine if you don't follow them online, but a waste of money for regular readers. Write More Good borrows the attitude and style of the fakeapstylebook tweets, but that's where it ends. As such, this is an entertaining read regardless of how much you've read on Twitter.

One small caution... if you're easily offended when someone pokes fun or parodies something that is close to your heart, then you might want to stay away. Everything is fair game here... you have been warned. :)

Write More Good is one of the more entertaining books I've read of late, and I know plenty of writer colleagues who will enjoy it as much as I did. They just need to remember the warning on the cover... "If you use this, you will get FIRED!"

Disclosure:
Obtained From: Publicist
Payment: Free

24 of 31 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars A MIRACLE!! April 5, 2011

By Joe Cucinotti

Format:Paperback

This book is an absolute revelation. I used to have inverted nipples but now, thanks to @fakeAPStylebook, they're normal again!