Customer Reviews

You Are Worthless: Depressing Nuggets of Wisdom Sure to Ruin Your Day

5 star:		(24)
4 star:		(7)
3 star:		(5)
2 star:		(2)
1 star:		(7)

 

 

I used to be a cheerful, if rather withdrawn fellow, but college made me into an out-and-out misanthrope. Naturally, I have developed a fascination for this brand of brutal pessimistic humor. This is certainly not the best in the line, but its sheer unsophistication can be refreshing.

As a whole, this book is uneven, but at its best it's outrageously funny (for instance, when it advices that you can get rid of your children by telling them a that "street hustling is a tried-and-true stepping-stone to movie stardom.")

Some might be disturbed by a book that says things like "think of the sweet release of death," even in jest. But I have discovered that for misanthropes like myself irony and a sense of humor are priceless survival skills. You will find that the dangerous misanthropes (like the Columbine killers) are the ones with large egos and no sense of humor.

If you enjoy this sort of thing but would like it in a more sophisticated form, I recommend Ambrose Bierce's _The Devil's Dictionary_ (first published in 1906), which memorably defined life as "a spiritual pickle that keeps the body from decay."

I thought that this book was the funniest book that anyone could ever read that wasn't going psycho. When I first picked up this book I had no idea what it was. I mean, what are you supposed to think when you see a book titled You Are Worthless? Anyway, I started reading a couple pages and I could not stop laughing out loud. This brings out a lot of details that are very, very true about a lot of people. I must have read the entire thing in about thirty minutes to an hour. I couldn't put it down. I always wanted to know what Oswald T. Pratt was going to say next. The stories he told and the things that he said made me want to make the book even longer with more topics. He talked just about everything: your life, your self-esteem, your friends, love, jobs, God, religion, and even more. I would definitely recommend this book to teenagers. They would be the ones who would laugh the most about what Pratt talks about. Adults, if you have a really great sense of humor and you aren't seeing a psychologist, then this is the book for you.

YOU ARE WORTHLESS is one of those bathroom readers that one gives or receives as a gag gift. That's how I got my copy ... from an ex-boss. (Hmmm... at least I think it was a gag gift.)

The book's hypothesis, made with one-liners and short observations, is that you and your life are essentially worthless and meaningless from the points of view of your friends, co-workers, boss, lovers, children, pets, and God. I guess one would have to be careful to whom to give this volume as a present. If the recipient was already suicidal, or maybe just enduring a 50th birthday, it might be enough to push him or her over the edge ... literally.

Some of the passages are particularly warm and fuzzy:

"Killing yourself would be a good idea. The only problem is that you don't have the guts"

"The bus driver would just as soon slit your throat as give you a ride."

"Next time you have sex, fixate on just how horribly unattractive your body is."

"You hate your job. And it's safe to say that no one at your job is particularly fond of you either."

"When you pray, no one is listening. Furthermore, you look ridiculous."

And my personal favorite, because I have a pet cat, Trouble, that I regard as my good buddy:

"That special bond you think you have with your pet is imaginary. As long as it has food and water, you could get hit by a train tomorrow, and your pet wouldn't think anything of it."

I'm enormously lucky in that I have a healthy level of self-esteem. Otherwise, I think I might close this book and go looking for a garden hose to attach to my car's exhaust pipe.

I am not kidding, this book is a wonderful, hilarious cheerer-upper. Plus, it makes you feel like it's ok to not have to be all "hey look at me I'm having the time of my life living happily after like in Pretty Woman or some other romantic comedy." My only criticism is that it does get repetitive after a while. Otherwise I would have given it 5 stars. Overall, a wonderful book!

When out of sheer curiosity I picked this book up off of a friend's coffee table, I had no idea what lay ahead. 25 seconds later, I was in tears. For anybody who appreciates satire and cynical humor, this book is a must. I haven't laughed so hard at anything else in my life, besides perhaps a couple timeless articles from the infamous spoof newspaper, The Onion.

Why would you buy a book that is supposed make you feel bad about yourself? Because it won't. I'm not sure why, but this book is brilliant. It will get you out of a depression... may be by putting you in another one, but it's worth it! Trust me on this.

I work in a bookstore and came across this book while shelving my humor section. It gave me a refreshing break from some of the books I deal with on a daily basis in my self improvement section. As another reviewer noted, it should make you feel worse if you feel bad, but it doesn't!! It helps you take yourself a little less seriously. Clearly you wouldn't give this book to a person who is clinically depressed. I'm giving it to my nephew for his college graduation. He has a healthy skepticism about the world and will enjoy this tongue-in-cheek look at life. One quote that struck a chord with me: "Your kids are nothing special. They're just like everyone else's kids." Made me laugh and I'll better handle the next person I come in contact with who goes on and on about their 4 year old reading Grapes Of Wrath .... I'll think of that line and smile. One caution: If you do not appreciate jibes taken at religion (ALL religions), don't read that section!

well, in a nutshell, i am worthless. but this book makes me proud of it!

of course i am not particularly special! of course i should have been aborted! of course my special someone is far less attracted to me than someone he or she saw on tv once! of course...the list just goes on and on.

i have personally sold over 21 copies of this book to friends and they love feeling worthless too!

in conclusion, i am worthless and so are you. i'm just more proud of it than you are.

I think this book is hilarious and brilliant. A slightly scarier aspect of it for me is that I find myself agreeing with most of its depressing assertions about humanity and human nature, but (or should I say "and"?) I think it's terrific.

If you prefer any of rose-colored glasses, self-delusion over uncomfortable truth, fake affection over real emptiness, and so on in that theme, you'll likely hate the book for most of the probably-valid reasons already stated by 1-star reviewers.

Otherwise you'll probably love it. It's scathing and funny, and well worth the money and time.

Wow! Another great book to add to my collection. I haven't felt this fulfilled since that last Dave Barry book.

PS: Not for the timid or young children. Parents beware...