If You Beat Your Fish It Will Die [Paperback]

Ray Owens (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: December 1, 1999

Selected humor from the world famous Joke A Day website where we have been proudly making fun of morons since 1997! This book contains the funniest jokes you will find anywhere! Also included are letters that you just won't believe! You'll cringe as well as laugh out loud at the stupidity of the writers! Guaranteed to make you laugh!

Editorial Reviews

Review

"Ridiculous! Not worth the paper it's printed on!" -- Steve Case

"You have the right to remain silent. . ." -- FBI Officials

"Your book sucks as much as your web site does!" -- Bill Gates

About the Author

Raised by wolves and a duck named "Max", the author, Ray Owens, is the Owner/President of Joke A Day -- the world's largest daily humor mailing list. Using nothing more than his God-given talent for goofing off, Ray has established Joke A Day as the ultimate time wasting site for people who really do have better things to do -- but don't want to do them. Proving that (God Forbid!) there must be more people out there just like him, Ray's articles have been featured in several ezines and he is considered the "Top Dog" in Internet humor.

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Paperback: 240 pages
• Publisher: Joke A Day; 1 edition (December 1, 1999)
• ISBN-10: 0965915204
• ISBN-13: 978-0965915205
• Product Dimensions: 8.9 x 6 x 0.6 inches
• Shipping Weight: 12.8 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (19 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #7,085,073 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Absolutely Hilarious, September 7, 2000

By 

Erin "barondove" (Cincinnati, OH USA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: If You Beat Your Fish It Will Die (Paperback)

Ray Owens is a funny guy, and this book is proof! No matter what your age, race, gender, religion, sexual orientation, or choice of Internet Provider, he'll be sure to insult you at least once and make you laugh histerically a million times. It does contain a lot of adult humor, so keep that in mind. Definitely recommended for anyone with a sense of humor, and the ability to take cracks with a grain of salt. Also recommended for those who hate AOL or morons, since there are many idiotic letters from said individuals. Happy reading!

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Laughs you can take anywhere, September 3, 2000

By 

R Allen (Athens, Georgia USA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: If You Beat Your Fish It Will Die (Paperback)

This is the funniest thing I have read in a long time without having to log on. It is a great collection of jokes (some old, some new) and dweeb (or idiot) letters that Ray has recieved in response to his letters and his web site. Like his web site and his daily mailings, you need to be an ADULT. You also need to have a warped sense of humor that allows you to laugh at yourself, as you will surely see yourself in this book somewhere.

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars The ultimate coffee table book, September 2, 2000

By 

Paul Passarelli (CT, USA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: If You Beat Your Fish It Will Die (Paperback)

When you're ready to inspire your friends with your wit, as opposed to try to impress them with your wallet, then you have attained the maturity necessary to own "If You Beat Your Fish It will Die". Ray has assembled a sampling of some of his favorite JOKES and moments since 1997 for our enjoyment. If you like the website, you'll love the book.

OK, OK! It's a joke book, think of it as a "Far Side" or "Dilbert" calendar that doesn't get used up in a year.