Customer Reviews

Is It You or Is It Me?: Why Couples Play the Blame Game

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Its hard to accept responsibility for all my arguments. This book will change the way you fight with a loved one, argue with others in the world and you will never view any communication with another person the same as you did before. A must read. From the beginning of the book you will continuously think its not me, its them, but Dr. Wetzler keeps beating you over the head until you know you have to accept at least some of the responsibility. And once you step over that line, the light bulb comes on. Read it twice: the second time you won't be looking for what the other guy did wrong. This book will change your life. Thank you Dr. Wetzler.

I bought this book about 5 years ago. It has been one of the most life changing books I have ever read. Like the other reviewer said, you finally see how you contribute to the issues, and it isn't always the other person in the relationship with the problem. This gives you some great tools on how to talk with another person as to not initiate their defense mechanism, and instead on how to discuss issues calmly, and in a respectful way. I will be re-reading this book soon.....it is a great tool.

HMMMMMM..
IN-sight-FULL.
Who IS to blame?
You will have to read this book to find out.

However, leaving that mystery up to the reader, these chapter names provide answers to:
how we get confused, if we're struggling with our partners or ourselves, confronting anger, blaming others for our disappointments, reasons we fight and why we shouldn't, the fragile male ego, women's fear of intimacy, sex and emotion, competition in a partnership, separation, reconciling the past and going forward.

This is light reading, but heavy thinking. It's an introspective workout and an excellent one. It's time to not only ASK the question, Is it You or Is It Me but, moreso, to ANSWER it.

Dr. Wetzler has given his readers priceless tools to help them answer this question for themselves without entering a therapists office.

However, though this is a self help book, you are not alone in reading it.
You are accompanied by Dr. Wetzler's presence throughout. You will find him to be understanding, patient, encouraging, brilliant, logical and on YOUR side.

This book is not just for the hurting couple, it's for everybody in any relationship.

Read the book, and should you choose to pursue any type of counseling, take this book to your first session and tell your counselor that you've given him/her a good head start, for this book is your intial reference point.

Arrived in advertised condition. This book offers essential ideas and compliments other books that seek to offer help to women (mostly--because men just move on or away), in their agonizing struggle to create and sustain relationships that can be rewarding for wives and their (unconsciously) reformed, husbands.