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You Say More Than You Think: Use the New Body Language to Get What You Want!, the 7-day Plan
 
 
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You Say More Than You Think: Use the New Body Language to Get What You Want!, the 7-day Plan [Hardcover]

Janine Driver (Author), Mariska van Aalst (Author)
4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (48 customer reviews)


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Book Description

February 16, 2010
Now You’re Talking!
Do you want to be bulletproof at work, secure in your relationship, and content in your own skin? If so, it’s more important than ever to be aware of what your body is saying to the outside world. Unfortunately, most of what you’ve heard from other body language experts is wrong, and, as a result, your actions may be hurting, not helping, you.
 
With sass and a keen eye, media favorite Janine Driver teaches you the skills she used every day to stay alive during her fifteen years as a body-language expert at the ATF. Janine’s 7-day plan and her 7-second solutions teach you dozens of body language fixes to turn any interpersonal situation to your advantage. She reveals methods here that other experts refuse to share with the public, and she debunks major myths other experts swear are fact: 

Giving more eye contact is key when you’re trying to impress someone.
Not necessarily true. It’s actually more important where you point your belly button. This small body shift communicates true interest more powerfully than constant eye contact.

The “steeple” hand gesture will give you the upper hand during negotiations and business meetings. Wrong. Driver has seen this overbearing gesture backfire more often than not. Instead, she suggests two new steeples that give you power without making you seem overly aggressive: the Basketball Steeple and the A-OK Two-Fingered Steeple.

Happy people command power and attention by smiling just before they meet new people.
Studies have shown that people who do this are viewed as Beta Leaders. Alpha leaders smile once they shake your hand and hear your name. 
 
At a time when every advantage counts—and first impressions matter more than ever—this is the book to help you really get your message across.

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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Starred Review. A former body-language specialist with the Department of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms, Driver has put her life on the line more times than she can count, depending on her understanding of body language-how to read it and how to use it-to survive. Now a professional body-language trainer, Driver puts her lessons to paper with straightforward prose and easy-to-use methodology, intended to help readers break bad habits, overcome misleading assumptions, avoid blind spots, and project the kind of confidence they need for successful communication and/or negotiation. Offering a number of tips across a range of settings (business, romance, courtroom, etc.), Driver's advice will give readers immediate, effective results, such as a step-by-step guide to "Active Listening Head Moves": "Now try the head tilt with the double nod. Did the person speed up the conversation?" Sound examples (many drawn from her professional adventures), revealing exercises and self-tests, and a game sense of humor keep Driver's considerable expertise from overwhelming readers, making this an enjoyable and highly practical self-help.

About the Author

JANINE DRIVER is the founder and president of the Body Language Institute, located in Washington, DC.  She is also a body language and deception detection expert and certified business coach who has appeared on NBC’s Today, ABC’s Good Morning America, The Rachael Ray Show, and Larry King Live. Janine travels the globe speaking to the corporate world on the fastest way to save time and grow business. Visit her online at lyintamer.com.

Product Details

  • Hardcover: 240 pages
  • Publisher: Crown Publishers; 1 edition (February 16, 2010)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0307453979
  • ISBN-13: 978-0307453976
  • Product Dimensions: 6.4 x 0.9 x 9.6 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 15.2 ounces
  • Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (48 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #295,228 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

48 Reviews
5 star:
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4 star:
 (9)
3 star:
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2 star:
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Average Customer Review
4.4 out of 5 stars (48 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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63 of 71 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars Good Material, but The suggestions and exercises leave a lot to be desired, March 9, 2010
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This review is from: You Say More Than You Think: Use the New Body Language to Get What You Want!, the 7-day Plan (Hardcover)
This book rocks with it's content and what it's teaching. I learned how to norm my boss and already asked for some great stuff! I love that. The Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes idea is great. She really breaks it down pretty well.

The BIG downside is she seems to have little respect for the readers time and finances. The first chapter says you need about 2 hours a day, for 7 days. I thought that was doable. But what I didn't expect was all the crazy suggestions: Buy a Nintendo, Go Skydiving, Sign up for Belly Dancing Lessons, Sign up for Salsa dancing, etc... Also if you were going to do this in 7 days and go to work, how would you get into any of the classes for find the time to go skydiving all within your "7 day makeover/"

She also mixes it up with home alone exercises and wome work out in public. I thought it would be more observation inside and out. But it requires: Staring at a painting at a museum for 30 Minutes for example... this takes at least an hour and I'm supposed to read and do 2-3 more exercises? Get a friend to come over and rollplay while you videotape, this one would take at least an hour... SO I find it's just not realisic or well thought out so I find that frusterating.

Bottom Line though, the content is good, just don't expect to be able to do her exercises the way she suggests unless you have a lot of extra cash and tons of free time...Oh and a video camera and friends that are available at the drop of a hat.
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20 of 22 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Lots of Helpful Tips, March 8, 2010
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This review is from: You Say More Than You Think: Use the New Body Language to Get What You Want!, the 7-day Plan (Hardcover)
Janine was the keynote at my organization's conference a few years back. After seeing her speak, I've started gain a real interest in body language. Out of all the books and information I have read or seen, this is definitely one of the best. After purchasing it a few days ago and reading through it, I've found a large amount of simple but surprising tips and tricks. One of my favorites is the the belly button rule, it helps me read other people im interacting with, while at the same time helping me focus my attention on the person I'm talking to. After reading the book, I have come to find that I may have been sending a lot of the wrong signals with my body position, the rules and other information gathered from the book has started to change my interactions with people.

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78 of 96 people found the following review helpful:
2.0 out of 5 stars A Selling Tool for Her Certification Course, June 12, 2010
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This review is from: You Say More Than You Think: Use the New Body Language to Get What You Want!, the 7-day Plan (Hardcover)
Let me begin by saying I have no skin in this game, as I am not hyping ANY OTHER book or Communication Improvement Skill course; I am merely giving a personal reaction to my interpretation of the written material as a mental health profession with over 35 years experience in the field.

The author makes many good points and the book is easy to read and follow with a fair number of black and white photos showing the before and after effect of each newly analyzed body language characteristic, but most disturbing is the continual encouragement to visit her official website [...]. I buy every book simply to be informed or entertained but not solicited. I am unsure how many agencies or companies would put great credence in a for-profit corporation issuing certifications. It has been my experience that most companies want job candidates and consultants to have degrees from established colleges/universities which are appropriately accredited. The book is full of first person testimonials from graduates of her course who proclaim miraculous reincarnations into far superior beings after taking the advertised course and after which they can lead their own groups, hopefully garnering some speaking engagements, as well. For an original and similar pep talk one can read Dale Carnegie's How to Win Friends and Influence People originally published many decades ago. It also has the same authoritarian flavor and doctrinaire game plan.

Many of the author's suggestion make a great deal of sense and are worth following, but in one instance she makes a great faux pas in stating that women wearing heels leads to an improvement in their posture. I would defy anyone to find an orthopedist, acting in his profession capacity, who would agree with that view, although as a male he would most likely approve of the arrow-pointed calves and the accentuated and protruding female derriere. At the same time it causes the stomach to protrude and causes an unnatural sway to the lower back known as LORDOSIS [medically described as an anteroposterior curvature of the spine] and less technically and less euphemistically as saddle back - think equestrian in this regard. Women wearing heels is the biggest cause of this. This last point is the only one I found of an inaccurate and misleading nature. As I have stated earlier in this assessment the book makes many good points, but I find it incomprehensible that a person can have a personality transformation in a mere seven days [as her course promises] of following pop culture dogma, although I am sure some proteges of the program will give anecdotal testimony to the contrary. My intention is to merely explain what you will be getting with this book. Your personality is the result of your entire lifetime experiences, be they good or bad, and a make-over in a week is simply not possible, unless one truly believes in reality TV shows. It's not a bad book, it is simply not a great book nor a must read.
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