You Were Always Mom's Favorite! and over one million other books are available for Amazon Kindle. Learn more
Buy Used
$3.74
FREE Shipping on orders over $35.
Used: Very Good | Details
Condition: Used: Very Good
Comment: While this book has been loved by someone else, they left it in great condition. Hurry and buy it before someone else does and take advantage of our FREE Super Saver Shipping!!!
Access codes and supplements are not guaranteed with used items.
Have one to sell? Sell on Amazon
Flip to back Flip to front
Listen Playing... Paused   You're listening to a sample of the Audible audio edition.
Learn more
See this image

You Were Always Mom's Favorite!: Sisters in Conversation Throughout Their Lives Hardcover – September 8, 2009

ISBN-13: 978-1400066322 ISBN-10: 1400066328 Edition: 1st

Used
Price: $3.74
52 New from $0.01 216 Used from $0.01 7 Collectible from $5.00
Amazon Price New from Used from
Kindle
"Please retry"
Hardcover
"Please retry"
$0.01 $0.01

NO_CONTENT_IN_FEATURE

Holiday Deals in Books
Holiday Deals in Books
Find deals for every reader in the Holiday Deals in Books store, featuring savings of up to 50% on cookbooks, children's books, literature & fiction, and more.

Product Details

  • Hardcover: 256 pages
  • Publisher: Random House; 1 edition (September 8, 2009)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1400066328
  • ISBN-13: 978-1400066322
  • Product Dimensions: 9.5 x 6.5 x 0.9 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1.1 pounds
  • Average Customer Review: 3.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (68 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #982,622 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

Review

 
“Siblings will jump on this book to read about pigeonholing . . . power dynamics . . . and the coded messages, fond or furious, that only the person who knows you best will understand.”
—O: The Oprah Magazine

 
“If you have a sister, you will probably recognize every detail and laugh or cry.”
The Daily Beast
 
“Tannen’s very talented ear allows her to see inside our most intense relationships using the windows of our words.”
Baltimore Sun
 
“Love/hate doesn’t begin to describe the elation and heartbreak, the humor and perplexed contradictions revealed in this delightful book when sisters speak of and to each other.”
The Philadelphia Inquirer



From the Trade Paperback edition.

About the Author

Deborah Tannen is the acclaimed author of You Just Don’t Understand, which was on the New York Times bestseller list for nearly four years including eight months as #1; the ten-week New York Times bestseller You’re Wearing THAT?: Understanding Mothers and Daughters in Conversation; I Only Say This Because I Love You: Talking to Your Parents, Partner, Sibs and Kids When You’re All Adults, which won the Books for a Better Life Award; Talking from 9 to 5: Women and Men at Work; That’s Not What I Meant!; and many other books. A professor of linguistics at Georgetown University, she has written for and been featured in newspapers and magazines such as The New York Times, The Washington Post, USA Today, Time, and Newsweek. She appears frequently on TV and radio, including such shows as 20/20, The Oprah Winfrey Show, The Colbert Report, Nightline, Today, Good Morning America, and NPR’s Morning Edition and All Things Considered. She is university professor and professor of linguistics at Georgetown University, and has been McGraw Distinguished Lecturer at Princeton University. She lives with her husband in the Washington, D.C., area.

More About the Author

Deborah Tannen is the acclaimed author of You Just Don't Understand, which was on the New York Times bestseller list for nearly four years including eight months as #1; the ten-week New York Times bestseller You're Wearing THAT?: Understanding Mothers and Daughters in Conversation; I Only Say This Because I Love You: Talking to Your Parents, Partner, Sibs and Kids When You're All Adults, which won the Books for a Better Life Award; Talking from 9 to 5: Women and Men at Work; That's Not What I Meant!; and many other books. A professor of linguistics at Georgetown University, she has written for and been featured in newspapers and magazines such as The New York Times, The Washington Post, USA Today, Time, and Newsweek. She appears frequently on TV and radio, including such shows as 20/20, The Oprah Winfrey Show, The Colbert Report, Nightline, Today, Good Morning America, and NPR's Morning Edition and All Things Considered. She is university professor and professor of linguistics at Georgetown University, and has been McGraw Distinguished Lecturer at Princeton University. She lives with her husband in the Washington, D.C., area.

Customer Reviews

That said, I didn't enjoy this book as much as "You Just Don't Understand".
Alan Mazer
I really wish Tannen would stick to Conversation Analysis and not try to write about how every family relationship in the world must be just like hers.
California Marmot
The book is very insightful and I learned much not only about relations between sisters, but also about other family relationships.
Shalom Freedman

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

37 of 37 people found the following review helpful By emmejay VINE VOICE on August 27, 2009
Format: Hardcover Vine Customer Review of Free Product ( What's this? )
I enjoyed You Just Don't Understand: Women and Men in Conversation and know of Tannen's other books, so was interested to see that she has sliced her studies of conversation yet another way here -- along sisterly lines in You Were Always Mom's Favorite!

It's an interesting slice since, as Tannen writes, "A sister is like yourself in a different movie, a movie that stars you in a different life." She posits that these lives revolve around a subset of sibling rivalry where sisters connect and compete in attempts to align themselves for parental love. She supports that not through strictly scientific data but rather social anecdotes -- examples pulled from literature, pop culture, and her own interviews. It's notable that I've recently read two other books that incorporate "everyman" quotes; they were clumsy in insertion and vacuous in content and frankly spoiled the works. But here, Tannen knows expertly when to summarize someone's comments, and when instead to roll seamlessly into a spot-on and memorable quote.

A couple quibbles. First, contrary to the subtitle, this book is not much about conversation. Rather, it's primarily about psychology and exploring the underlying family roles and dynamics that sometimes bubble up into verbal and nonverbal communications.

Second, Tannen leaves no stone unturned, no shade of gray unexamined. At one point, she refers to the 17 single-spaced pages of research notes she'd accumulated for one topic; I think she included every one of them in this book -- first via a complete, fully formed example, then appended with a summarizing paragraph.
Read more ›
Comment Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
Thank you for your feedback. If this review is inappropriate, please let us know.
Sorry, we failed to record your vote. Please try again
23 of 23 people found the following review helpful By N. Bilmes VINE VOICE on August 18, 2009
Format: Hardcover Vine Customer Review of Free Product ( What's this? )
My wife's relationships with her sisters drive me absolutely bonkers. One day/month/year they're best friends who do lots of things together, and the next second/minute/hour they're arch enemies who can't agree on anything. Deborah Tannen's book is an entertaining look at the dynamics of sister-sister conversations, and although it doesn't explain everything I'd like to know about why my wife and her two sisters act the way they do, it at least let me know that there are lots of other sisters out there who act just as bizarrely.

I recommend this for anyone who wants support in trying to negotiate this minefield.
Comment Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
Thank you for your feedback. If this review is inappropriate, please let us know.
Sorry, we failed to record your vote. Please try again
15 of 15 people found the following review helpful By Emily Glickman VINE VOICE on July 30, 2009
Format: Hardcover Vine Customer Review of Free Product ( What's this? )
I loved Tannen's book about mothers and daughters in conversation, so I had to read her latest, about sisters. If you have a sister or daughters I think you will find this book enjoyable and useful. It's interesting that sisters' conversational themes are so universal that Tannen can analyze them.

Most helpfully, Tannen addresses why sisters compete. She gives parents tips about how to minimize sisters' rivalry and adult sisters advice about how not to get riled up about old childhood baggage.
Comment Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
Thank you for your feedback. If this review is inappropriate, please let us know.
Sorry, we failed to record your vote. Please try again
11 of 11 people found the following review helpful By Elaine Tanay on September 6, 2009
Format: Hardcover
I am an avid reader,yet this book has engrossed me like no other. It has transported me back to my childhood, released memories long repressed, and given voice to fears of the future that have remained unspoken. Deborah Tannen becomes like a sister surrogate as she gently guides you through the labyrinth of layers that engulf the sister relationship within the family: the alignments that are forged with or against parents that make or break the sister bond, the importance of the birth order, the inevitable competition between sisters, such as "the pretty vs the smart one" and the pitfalls of each assigned role, and much, much more.. Ms Tannen's beautiful prose makes the reading of this well researched, relevant and highly therapeutic book a true pleasure. I have read all of her previous work, and this is her best publication so far. I could not stop reading it.
Comment Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
Thank you for your feedback. If this review is inappropriate, please let us know.
Sorry, we failed to record your vote. Please try again
10 of 10 people found the following review helpful By Esther Schindler TOP 500 REVIEWERVINE VOICE on October 16, 2009
Format: Hardcover Vine Customer Review of Free Product ( What's this? )
I haven't peeked at what others have said about this book, but I think it's nearly impossible to review it without telling personal stories. I, for instance, am the youngest of four children, with my siblings 10, 12, and 14 years older than me. I grew up with a generation gap between my sisters and myself, and I'm closer in age to my oldest nephew than I am to his father. I found myself in plenty of awkward situations, particularly after all my siblings married (when I was 10); suddenly I was an Only Child.

All those family interrelationships made this book a particular standout among my Amazon Vine choices. Deborah Tannen is famous for exploring so many other relationships, especially regarding gender. Could she spread some enlightenment here, I wondered?

She could.

Tannen interviewed hundreds of women with sisters. And by telling stories, LOTS of stories, she identifies the ways in which our "sisterness" affects us, for good or for ill. Some of the conclusions start out seeming obvious, such as the Oldest Sister so often being called upon to protect and take care of the younger children... except Tannen follows the role into adulthood, and shares how that experience shaped both the oldest sister and the younger ones too. She highlights how the relationships between brothers is like AND unlike sisters' relationships; for instance, men are more likely to say that they and their brothers are "just like" each other, while women generally define themselves by their perceived differences ("I'm the smart one and she's the pretty one" or "I'm tall and she's short") -- and then she passes along stories from her interviews about how those perceptions create opportunities and traps.
Read more ›
Comment Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
Thank you for your feedback. If this review is inappropriate, please let us know.
Sorry, we failed to record your vote. Please try again

Most Recent Customer Reviews