15 of 15 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Worth buying and keeping, to use again and again!, September 2, 2001
This review is from: You Will Dream New Dreams: Inspiring Personal Stories by Parents of Children With Disabilities (Paperback)
YOU WILL DREAM NEW DREAMS.
That is what all of us parents of disabled children need to hear and memorize, and accept.
Based on my own experience, the hardest part of having a "child with a label" is that one tiny little label can demolish dreams you've had for years. These dreams are not just goals, or aims in life, but the future we had counted on and desperately hoped for. Once the label is affixed to your child, though, you desperately hope and pray for any future at all. In order to move forward to that, one has to let go of most of the old dreams and a rebuild. THAT is the toughest part about life with a disabled child.
YOU WILL DREAM NEW DREAMS.
And you will. This book is a compilation of many, many parents with children afflicted by various disabilities. Some will be milder than your child's, and some will be far worse. Some stories will make you laugh, some will tear your heart out and make you wonder why you're reading this book. But in the end, this book helps you to realize that you are in no way alone. Not only is God watching over you and carrying you through the roughest points, YOU WILL DREAM NEW DREAMS shows you that you also have a huge camaraderie of other parents, going through similar fates as yours.
The book is arranged according to the age of the disabled child, from youngest to oldest. In the beginning, the letters are still too raw and full of pain. Again, you wonder why you're reading it. But then, in the middle, which is about where my life stands, you start to feel like, "Yes... this is me, this is what I am going through.... I am not alone." But the last third of the book is devoted to parents who have "been there, done that, and lived to tell about it". The amount of hope it offers is incredible. There is no advice as credible as that of someone who has walked the path before you, and these parents have done just that.
You will meet, in this book, a huge array of parents, all with one thing in common: their child or children who are "not normal," for lack of a better word. Some, you will agree with. Some, you will detest and find repulsive. Some, you will admire. But all will help you in one way or another, no matter what your child has been diagnosed with. Everything from mild afflictions to fatal conditions are covered.
I have read so many books on parenting a disabled child, since autism has entered my life without my permission. Many of the books that are written are about the "exception" to the rule, the one who got better, the one who was misdiagnosed, the one who 'such and such therapy' transformed, healed, cured, or what have you.
I am not a stupid or gullible person. I will not help my children by hoping to be the exception, but rather by assuming they are the norm amongst their peers. I have nothing to gain by reading of miracle cures that worked for a handful of kids. I have nothing to gain by comparing my child to "the exception", as chances are - - my child will not be the exception.
What I need to hear, feel and see is that my life is blessed by having this child in it. I need to see why, I know to know why, and I need to believe why. I need to function today and tomorrow by making it better for my child, and making her into the best that she can be, regardless of circumstances. I need not set myself up for disappointment when I could have just let my child learn, grow, and improve at her own rate, and be surprised countless times along the way, and just as proud as any other mom of an autistic child.
YOU WILL DREAM NEW DREAMS does just that for me. It showed me that there are many kids with tougher labels out there who do so much better. But it showed me just as clearly that I am so lucky and blessed that my child is here, living, and healthy. I am so fortunate that my child loves to be held, or loves to be tickled. In many ways, I am blessed that my child does not realize that she is different from "the other children" right now.
This book has rejuvenated me, and renewed my determination to move forward with my little girl. While I still consider myself to be in the grieving stages, and while I do not expect my heart to stop breaking into a million pieces on a daily basis - - - since reading this book tonight, I feel stronger and more able.
Right now, I feel that my heart has been filled with love again, and "something" is holding the pieces together again.
As most of you either know or will realize - - in the kind of life we live - - -today, right now, tonight, this moment is what is most important. And this book can make that moment, however long or short it may be, a little better, and more bearable.
I highly recommend YOU WILL DREAM NEW DREAMS.
Help other customers find the most helpful reviews
Was this review helpful to you? Yes
No
9 of 9 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
as a sibling, September 28, 2004
This review is from: You Will Dream New Dreams: Inspiring Personal Stories by Parents of Children With Disabilities (Paperback)
As a sibling of a child with special needs, You Will Dream New Dreams helped me evaluate the dreams I have had for my brother in the past, and how I should change them for the future. It also helped me better understand my parents, and how they have coped with having a child with a special need.
I would highly recommend this book to parents, and older siblings of children with special needs, and to professionals that are planning on working with children with special needs. I feel that this book would provide parents a feeling of support and hope for their child and their child's future. I think that this book would help older siblings understand their parents better, and why they have done things in life in a certain way. As for professionals, I feel it allows them an insight into the types of families they may be working with, which will allow them to empathize with the family rather than sympathize for the family.
Help other customers find the most helpful reviews
Was this review helpful to you? Yes
No