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You Will Dream New Dreams: Inspiring Personal Stories by Parents of Children With Disabilities

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YOU WILL DREAM NEW DREAMS.
That is what all of us parents of disabled children need to hear and memorize, and accept.
Based on my own experience, the hardest part of having a "child with a label" is that one tiny little label can demolish dreams you've had for years. These dreams are not just goals, or aims in life, but the future we had counted on and desperately hoped for. Once the label is affixed to your child, though, you desperately hope and pray for any future at all. In order to move forward to that, one has to let go of most of the old dreams and a rebuild. THAT is the toughest part about life with a disabled child.
YOU WILL DREAM NEW DREAMS.
And you will. This book is a compilation of many, many parents with children afflicted by various disabilities. Some will be milder than your child's, and some will be far worse. Some stories will make you laugh, some will tear your heart out and make you wonder why you're reading this book. But in the end, this book helps you to realize that you are in no way alone. Not only is God watching over you and carrying you through the roughest points, YOU WILL DREAM NEW DREAMS shows you that you also have a huge camaraderie of other parents, going through similar fates as yours.
The book is arranged according to the age of the disabled child, from youngest to oldest. In the beginning, the letters are still too raw and full of pain. Again, you wonder why you're reading it. But then, in the middle, which is about where my life stands, you start to feel like, "Yes... this is me, this is what I am going through.... I am not alone." But the last third of the book is devoted to parents who have "been there, done that, and lived to tell about it". The amount of hope it offers is incredible. There is no advice as credible as that of someone who has walked the path before you, and these parents have done just that.
You will meet, in this book, a huge array of parents, all with one thing in common: their child or children who are "not normal," for lack of a better word. Some, you will agree with. Some, you will detest and find repulsive. Some, you will admire. But all will help you in one way or another, no matter what your child has been diagnosed with. Everything from mild afflictions to fatal conditions are covered.
I have read so many books on parenting a disabled child, since autism has entered my life without my permission. Many of the books that are written are about the "exception" to the rule, the one who got better, the one who was misdiagnosed, the one who 'such and such therapy' transformed, healed, cured, or what have you.
I am not a stupid or gullible person. I will not help my children by hoping to be the exception, but rather by assuming they are the norm amongst their peers. I have nothing to gain by reading of miracle cures that worked for a handful of kids. I have nothing to gain by comparing my child to "the exception", as chances are - - my child will not be the exception.
What I need to hear, feel and see is that my life is blessed by having this child in it. I need to see why, I know to know why, and I need to believe why. I need to function today and tomorrow by making it better for my child, and making her into the best that she can be, regardless of circumstances. I need not set myself up for disappointment when I could have just let my child learn, grow, and improve at her own rate, and be surprised countless times along the way, and just as proud as any other mom of an autistic child.
YOU WILL DREAM NEW DREAMS does just that for me. It showed me that there are many kids with tougher labels out there who do so much better. But it showed me just as clearly that I am so lucky and blessed that my child is here, living, and healthy. I am so fortunate that my child loves to be held, or loves to be tickled. In many ways, I am blessed that my child does not realize that she is different from "the other children" right now.
This book has rejuvenated me, and renewed my determination to move forward with my little girl. While I still consider myself to be in the grieving stages, and while I do not expect my heart to stop breaking into a million pieces on a daily basis - - - since reading this book tonight, I feel stronger and more able.
Right now, I feel that my heart has been filled with love again, and "something" is holding the pieces together again.
As most of you either know or will realize - - in the kind of life we live - - -today, right now, tonight, this moment is what is most important. And this book can make that moment, however long or short it may be, a little better, and more bearable.

I highly recommend YOU WILL DREAM NEW DREAMS.

You Will Dream New Dreams helped me deal with some of the feelings of grief and pain as the mother of a special needs toddler. I found hope, inspiration, and understanding in the experiences of other parents. I wish I had had this book when my baby was first diagnosed! You can read this book in small doses-one or two essays at a time--, which I found helpful as mom to a busy little one! P.S. - Don't forget the tissues when you read it.

As a sibling of a child with special needs, You Will Dream New Dreams helped me evaluate the dreams I have had for my brother in the past, and how I should change them for the future. It also helped me better understand my parents, and how they have coped with having a child with a special need.

I would highly recommend this book to parents, and older siblings of children with special needs, and to professionals that are planning on working with children with special needs. I feel that this book would provide parents a feeling of support and hope for their child and their child's future. I think that this book would help older siblings understand their parents better, and why they have done things in life in a certain way. As for professionals, I feel it allows them an insight into the types of families they may be working with, which will allow them to empathize with the family rather than sympathize for the family.

"You Will Dream New Dreams" is a gift to any family experiencing the shock of learning that their child has a disability. From personal experience I can testify to what a disorienting and difficult time that can be. Professionals, no matter how well meaning or informed they may be, never quite have the right thing to say. Other parents who have been through the same trying time are the one irreplacable resource that can actually make you believe that you will survive and that your 'surpise' child will be a joy and wonder after all. Unfortunately finding another family to talk to can be quite difficult. Reading the essays in this book is a good substitute. The writing is heartfelt and full of experience, wisdom and hope. As a parent of a 'special needs' child I recommend this book highly.

Eight months ago I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy. He was
probably the most wanted and planned for baby--ever. My husband and I were so very happy and excited about this new life that we
had created and had so many hopes and dreams for all of our
futures. Then we were given devastating news. Just hours after Zachary's birth, my husband tearfully informed me that there was
something wring with our baby. Greg told me that Zachary had a serious heart defect and then he said the words that I can still hear to this day: "And honey, the doctors think he has Down Syndrome." I thought the world had just opened up and swallowed me. My grief and shock were absolutely agonizing and overwhelming.

I read You Will New Dreams when Zachary was about six months old, and I have found this book comforting and validating. There is such solace in knowing that other parents have been where I am now and that it does get better. I have learned that I am not alone; the wisdom and strength of the parents who have written these essays has helped me immeasurably. I've learned that it's okay to celebrate my sweet, precious child and also grieve for lost hopes and dreams. Thank you, Stanley Klein and Kim Schive!!

Many of these reviews are quite long, so I'll try to make this short. As a mother of a 19 month old baby with cerebral palsy it was a great help to me. Sometimes it is hard to pick up because it hits so close to home.

We have discussed this book in my parents group and almost everyone found something they could relate to.

My favorite thing about this book is that it is written for everyone, not just the very religious.

I have borrowed this book from a local orginization twice and am buying it today.

Love your children, but don't forget to love yourself
Carye

I feared that this might be a maudlin book about "special children." Instead, it is a collection of parents' stories -- straight-forward and often uplifting without straying into the maudlin. These parents talk about their shock, their grief, their struggle, their pride, their success. This book helpfully includes a variety of types of disabilities and stories about children ages infant through adult. Several of the parents talk about school inclusion -- an extremely important topic for parents of kids with special needs.

One quibble that I have with this book is the frequent emphasis on parent-to-parent support. I believe that, while this is extremely helpful to some parents, it is not necessarily universally helpful.

If you're a parent of a child with special needs, I believe that this book will speak to you. If you are a teacher -- of any kind, at any level -- PLEASE read this book and gain new insight into the experiences of parents of children with special needs.

I'm disabled and was born in the '60s during a time that disabilities were not quite understood. I wanted to read this book to get some insight what my mother has gone through having a disabled child (me). There were about 2 or 3 stories that were excellent and quite moving. These few stories were of courage, success and strength. The other stories (the bulk of the book), to me, were very disappointing. It was redundant and stressed too much on how devastated the parent's were about having a disabled child. My mother was not devastated, although she did go through frustrations, process of trying to understand me, and saddness from professionals. It was not easy for her, but it wasn't devastating either. As a disabled person, it was hurting to read how many people were devasted in having a disabled child. It brought pain to me in how society can't accept us disabled person's as an individual. That we always have to PROVE ourselves constantly, sadly, even to our parents. In this book, it tells me these human beings had to prove themselves because their parent's were so devastated their child wasn't perfect. This hurts and I certainly didn't like many formats of the stories, they were redundant as if following a certain formula of the editors. Maybe the writers did write more of a full story, perhaps the editors focused too much on the greiving of the parents. I would have rather seen triumpts and how to get through it all rather than the "my life was shattered because my baby wasn't perfect, but later the baby proved to me other-wise" format. If the book helps parents, then I am truly happy, as a disabled person's perspective, I just found the book rather upsetting and disappointing, I didn't think it was inspiring at all (except for the 2-3 stories out of 49??).

You've probably heard the maxim, "I'm a better teacher than I am a student." As a golden mom (I delivered a baby after 40 years old) with a doctorate in Ed.Administration and a bachelor's degree in Speech Therapy, I thought I knew all the answers, or at least how to find them, about my son's Down Syndrome. Well, by no means did my education prepare me for the kaleidascope of feelings I have had these past eight years with Sammy. I have been starving for a book such as this one. It has real stories by exceptional parents. All the textbooks in the world can't begin to describe what these 236 pages of wisdom so beautifully convey. Bravo and a big hug to all the parents who shared their story!

Every parent of a special needs child should be given a copy of this book when their child is born. This book really touched me and helped me to deal with my own feelings.