Customer Reviews

Your Kids Are Your Own Fault: A Guide For Raising Responsible, Productive Adults

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If you look at Larry Winget and me, you wouldn't think we are very similar. I don't wear the flashy colored shirts like he does, I don't have earrings, and I do have hair. Well, looks can be deceiving, because we sure think a lot a like. I didn't really know anything about Winget until last summer when I checked out one of his books from the library. I agreed with a lot of it and ended up purchasing a few others. When I learned he had one coming out on raising kids, I looked forward to it. Now, after reading it, I agree with Winget that this is his most important book.

"Your Kids Are Your Own Fault: A Guide For Raising Responsible, Productive Adults" by Larry Winget should be read by anyone and everyone raising kids. Yes, I believe that! Is it because Winget is the be all and end all of parenting advice? Heck no! He'd be the first to agree with me on that. It's because he raises so many important issues in this book that need to be addressed and he provides common sense advice for dealing with these topics. I firmly believe all parents should study being better parents and learn all they can regarding raising their children. My wife and I are far from perfect parents, but we try. We go to parenting classes offered in town and we read various books on parenting. We continue to do so, and that's why I wanted to read "Your Kids Are Your Own Fault." Anything that can help me be a better father is worth the time to me.

So what's so good about this book? A lot! In his direct no-nonsense style, Winget first lays out what he believes is wrong with many kids today. Having seen kids at the mall and local YMCA that have no respect for the facility, equipment, and others; having seen overweight kids stuffing their faces at fast food joints; and having seen many of the statistics Winget provides to illustrate the problems, I agree with him. It's a problem! I hope this book wakes some people up to these alarming trends in today's youth.

Winget then goes on to describe his five basics of parenting: Communication, Involvement, Education, Discipline, and Punishment. Hard to argue those are not extremely important and he provides some good advice regarding all five.

The third section of the book focuses on what Winget believes should be taught to kids. In this section he has short chapters about a lot of important topics such as: Money, Sex, Relationships, Health, Appearance, School, Technology, Cars, Honesty, Integrity, Lying, Religion, Finding Purpose, and Succeeding. He offers straight-forward advice on what to teach kids about these subjects and why.

Now you might not agree with everything he advises, and that's okay. There are a few places where I certainly differ in opinion. You should too! You need to think for yourself and use the book as a guide, not a bible. Winget himself acknowledges some of what he writes will make people mad and some won't agree with him on things, and that's okay with him. But do him and me both a favor. Read what he wrote with an open mind and then take those areas that can help you be a better parent and apply it to your own parenting. I'll bet you'll find a lot here that is helpful.

Throughout the book Winget asks questions and provides a few lines for you to answer them. Even if you don't write out the answers in the book, these questions are worth taking a moment or two and answering. Thinking about your answers to these topics and then applying what you think about can help you be a better parent.

Love him or hate him, you can't deny that Winget loves his kids unconditionally and wants all parents to do the same. He believes this is his most important book because he believes kids are our future and it is a parent's responsibility to raise kids to be responsible, productive adults. I agree with him and recommend this book wholeheartedly to all parents and anyone else who influences the lives of children.

Reviewed by Alain Burrese, J.D., author of Hard-Won Wisdom From the School of Hard Knocks.

As with Larry Winget's other books, the finger in pointing right at you in this book. Like he has stated, "Nothing gets better until you get better, and everything gets better when you get better." This time it's not just about you, it's about your kids, your friend's kids, kids you teach and other children in your family. Want better children in your life, be a better adult. It's time that parents start waking up and take a look at a toxic world when the pendulum has swung too far and our children are out of control. This book is that wake up call.
I have taught children for years now and have slowly watched things get out of control. (except now things are rapidly getting out of control). Parents just let their children do whatever they want while they sit on the sidelines and ignore it. With my first child on the way, I was afraid of the world they would be growing up in. How can I prevent the influences of the media, MTV, magazines, and other children (and adults) my daughter will be around to negatively effect her? Larry answered the question. I have to be the parent. I have to be the one who stands up to these influences and says that this is not the way to behave. I have to set the example. If I want my daughter to respect other people, I have to respect other people. If I want my daughter to be smart with her money, I have to be smart with my money. If I want my daughter to read books and not sit in front of the television or computer, I have to read books and not sit in front of the television or computer.
Larry shows that you do not have to be harsh, or threaten or punish your children or put them on the "Time Out Step" in order to make them behave. On the contrary, if you are a good parent and your roll is clear, punishment will be the last thing you have to do.
As the title for this review states, this is not a "How To" raise your child book. It will not give you step by step instructions to guide them through their first years, school years, adolescent years, etc. This book is a "Why To Raise Your Children Properly" book. It's also not just about the child, it's about you. Don't buy this book thinking that it's going to be about how to set your crazy kid straight without doing any work yourself. It's going to require MORE work on your part. Remember, your kids (and your life) are YOUR FAULT. Read this book and start taking personal responsibility for your life and your child's life.

As the parent of 4 young children I have read many different books and listened to numerous cd's about raising, caring for and teaching my children. I have never read a book quite like Larry's. In fact I bought the book in spite of the fact that I have never read any of Larry's works and knew nothing about his approach to raising children or as Larry says "adults". From the beginning I was hooked. Here was a man that did not have M.D. or Phd. following his name writing a book about raising children and go figure he knew what he was talking about. I found Larry's writing refreshing and different from any of the other books I have read on this subject. I was relieved that someone had stepped out of the clinical approach to parenting and into the reality of parenting. I was shocked at the things that I realized I was letting my kids see, do and experience that I hadn't even thought about, such as watching evening television with me although the programming was not age appropriate. I figured they didn't know what was going on and weren't picking most of it up anyway. After reading Larry's book and reading that children as young as elementary school were having sex and largely due to the things that they see on TV and all around them; my children will no longer be watching evening TV with me, in fact the TV is going off in the evening. If they can't watch it I won't watch it (until they are in bed!). I was grateful to learn of the things that I was doing wrong as a parent so that I could fix them and I was even more grateful to learn of the things I was doing right as a parent so I can continue to do them. Of course I did not agree with everything that was written I took many valuable lessons from what I did agree with. This book not only showed me what I should be like as a parent but it showed me the good and bad things that my parents did and helped me to set goals to make my kids growing experience better than mine was. My parenting has changed over the last week that I have read this book and it has changed for the better. After I read this book I did the best thing I could think of, I passed it on to a friend and when she is done I hope she will do someone else the same courtesy. Thank you Larry for being honest and letting us have a glimpse into your family.

This book is the real deal; Just like Larry. It's for parents who want to step up their role as parents, and people like me who are enroute to parenthood. I needed this book. He avoids the fluff and gets to the meat of what really goes into parenting...responsibility, discipline, integrity and a plan. Having been raised by conservative parents (from Brooklyn) who allowed me to fail (and learn its lessons) and who also fed me the 'brutal truth' about life at an early age, I appreciate Larry's blunt yet powerful style. This book also made me appreciate my parents even more! Thanks Larry.

Let me say just two things about Your Kids Are Your Own Fault...
1. I have two little girls, ages 4 and 8. They are THE most important thing in my life and I want to be the best father I can possibly be. Larry's book has the best parenting advice I've ever seen or heard - EVER!
2. This is the best book Larry has ever written. For those of you who are fans of Larry's previous books, you know that to say that this is the best of the bunch is truly saying something!!! And this IS the best of the bunch.
This book will crawl all over you, make you mad, inspire you, and, most of all, make you want to be a better parent and teach you how. I wish that Amazon had more stars for me to give this book. It is truly OUTSTANDING!!!

Winget's advice is essential reading for anyone who is raising or plans to raise a child. None of that mushy self esteem stuff-- he gets right to the common sense point, and does it very entertainingly. The book is not only valuable information, it is fun to read.

As a mother of 3 elementary age children I encourage you to buy this book! You may not agree with all of Larry's editorial comments because they are frank and in your face, which is why I love Larry's books. We must all take responsibility for the decisions and the actions we make as parents and people. This book provokes thought and common sense into the real world of parenting kids. It made me feel accountable and step back to consciously think about how I am raising my children and the values I am promoting to them. You may not agree with all of the advice because it will hit you in the face but I guarantee you will think about it and make a conscious decision about the way in which you decide to parent on that issue. We as parents must address issues and make conscious decisions on how to handle them or our children will grow up and be gone before it ever occurs to us that we had choices. This book helps you to stop being lazy with your parenting and motivates you to THINK about how our parenting can a difference. We all pretty much want the BEST for our children for them to grow up to be happy, productive, and healthy adults, some of us want even more than that for our kids, but passive parenting will not get most of our children there. Buy this book, start thinking about it and implement the life lessons you desire for your children. There are no BAD children, they are CHILDREN! However all children need guidance and love and GOOD PARENTING!

Exactly the smack along side the head that I needed, as I raise three boys. Larry reminds us that, although our kids may receive some of our better qualities, they will certainly absorb the worst of what they see and hear from their parents. We have to be the best role models possible. If not, we need to point the fingers at ourselves in the mirror when our kids don't turn out to be the leaders of their generation. Thanks, Larry!

Here's what I like about Larry Winget's books- many "self help" folks will give you some vague concept, and fail to give your concrete examples of what the enactment of their concept looks like in the real world. Not so with Larry. His advice is common sense, honestly, the things most of us know to do if we just stopped taking shortcuts and started acting responsible.

Being a parent is a huge job, and with common sense, practical examples, and honesty Larry gives great advice on how to be the best parent you can be. My copy of this book is highlighted from one end to the other, and now I have my husband reading it.

Thank you for this great, non-preachy guide to parenting. I am going to give copies to everyone I know.

Larry tells like it is. Some people just can't handle the simple truth. Start taking responsibility for your kids and be ACCOUNTABLE for your actions and decisions you make with them. Nobody wants to take responsibility when their kids are screw-ups, but boy do they like to brag about their "accomplishments". One of my favorite qoutes was qouted by Mr Winget: "The most important thing my parents ever taught me was that you can lose everything you own, but no one can take away your education" ~Richard Mc Aroy~ EDUCATE yourself and your CHILDREN for christ's sake!