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On Your Own Again Paperback – October 1, 1992

4.2 out of 5 stars 12 customer reviews

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Editorial Reviews

From the Inside Flap

Every year, more than two million North Americans experience the trauma of separation and divorce. Now, at last, On Your Own Again provides down-to-earth help for readers seeking to survive a shattered relationship and build a new life.Written in Dr. Anderson's own personable, reassuring voice, this guide explains the four emotional stages undergone during and after separation and gives every reader the feeling, "He's talking about me."

Dr. Anderson offers compassionate, practical, step-by-step advice. In no-nonsense language, often leavened with humour,he provides tools that can be used by readers male or female, young or middle-aged, straight or gay, in or recently out of a troubled relationship, to help cope with the loss and to speed recovery ? so that they may lead rich, rewarding lives on their own again.

About the Author

Dr. Keith Anderson has been a practising psychiatrist for 16 years. He is in private practice in Ottawa where he is also affiliated with the Ottawa Civic Hospital. Author of articles published in the American Journal of Psychiatry, Dr. Anderson has been president of the Ottawa Academy of Medicine, Psychiatry Section, for the past three years. He has two teenaged children from his first marriage, who live half time with Dr. Anderson and his second wife, Judith.

Roy MacSkimming is a professional writer and a published novelist. He has been literary editor of The Toronto Star and is now director of the Association of Canadian Publishers. Roy MacSkimming and his wife, Suzette, have lived in Europe and raised two sons.
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 192 pages
  • Publisher: McClelland & Stewart (October 1, 1992)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0771007507
  • ISBN-13: 978-0771007507
  • Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 0.5 x 8.2 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 8 ounces
  • Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (12 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #2,519,488 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Top Customer Reviews

Format: Paperback
I read this book when it was recommended by my therapist, after I had realized I was permanently seperated from my wife. I found I read this book in two stages. The first stage, when I fully understood that I truly was on my own again, I was able to read and appreciate roughly the first half. I found interesting insights into the day to day process of adjusting to the reality of having my marriage end, and now dealing with the crush of details demanding attention. After a few months break, I found myself diving in to read the rest of the book, and finding how closely my own life was following the path described in the book. This book is not a how-to guide to divorce or seperation. It IS a tool to help understand the emotions you are experiencing, the panic, the feeling that you are where no one else has ever been. And, it has helped me to understand that there are things that I miss and desire, but whose time has yet to come. I hope others will find similar benefits in this book. My only complaint is that at a time of such great stress, including the major financial uncertainty involved in seperation and divorce, it seemed a bit expensive for less content than I had hoped. This only served to make me think twice when this book should be a no-brainer.
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Format: Paperback
This is a wonderful book with words of comfort and patience that are as up-to-date as any thing else out there. This author writes from the point of view of a therapist AND a person who has been there himself. He does not seek to explain the why of a breakup...but rather how to move on. I found the section on the most common mistakes people get into in the acute stage of breakup wonderfully "right on time." While this book focuses heavily on marriage and heterosexual relationships, I think anyone just out of a committed relationship will find it helpful.
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Format: Paperback
Interestingly, most books on the subject of dealing with the aftermath of separation and divorce are aimed towards a female audience. Of all the titles I browsed, this was one that struck me as non gender specific. In purchasing the book and reading it, I found that the book was wonderfully applicable to both men and women.

Personally, I gained a great deal of insight into the things I have been experiencing since my wife announced that she wanted to separate. I started to read the book feeling that I was the only one in the world in a similar situation that was feeling the things that I was feeling. Very early into the book, I found that not only was it true that others were feeling these very same things but that these feelings were actually normal.

I took great comfort in being able to place myself in the process that the book describes. I also derived certain comfort in the knowledge of what is to come as I continue through the process. After all, if the author has defined the parts of the process I have experienced in such a correct manner, is it not logical to assume that the remainder of the process will be much as he has described in the book?

Without reservation I can say that this book has helped. It is informative, insightful and full of very true observations. If you need to come to grips with the things that are associated with being suddenly on your own as the result of divorce and separation, this book will most assuredly assist you.
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Format: Paperback
Going through a separation/divorce right now myself, I was recommended 'On Your Own Again: The Down-to-Earth Guide to Getting Through a Divorce or Separation and Getting on with Your Life' by a friend. She said that it was well worth reading and helped her when her own engagement broke off. I took the book and planned on reading it but never expected that I would be so GLUED to the contents like I was. This is the rare kind of book that I will read multiple times for so many reasons. From the feelings of being alone again to missing your kids to financial woes to how to move on with your life, this book is a guide that should be read, appreciated, and FOLLOWED. The writing is taut and easy with no heavy psychological terms or examples. Case studies are relevant and helpful to make you feel like you aren't the only person that has gone through this before. The book is short but long enough to drive the point home. For all therapists that are working with people in this situation they should have stacks of this book to give out to patients. I have found this to be one of the most helpful books I have ever read and many parts of the book made me smile during these tough times. The only thing that is the "cure" for these kinds of things is time, but knowing there are others that can relate and understand makes the experience easier.

***** HIGHEST POSSIBLE RECOMMENDATION
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Format: Paperback
When I decided to break off the relationship with my partner, it was truly the most difficult decision of my life - emotional, heartbreaking, and gut-wrenching. The worst part was feeling the guilt of knowing I had shattered someone else's heart. This book was an excellent way to begin the journey to healing for myself, through understanding what I need to do to prepare myself for the road ahead -- whether alone or coupled. My only disappointment is that while this book did mention that it was targeted equally to couples separating, regardless of who did the deed, the stories clearly focused on the difficult time of those who had their partners leave them, rather than on those who had difficulty coping with a decision they had made to end their relationship. Overall, however, a fantastic tool for those going through a separation or divorce.
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