Customer Reviews

Zen and the Art of Vampires

5 star:		(10)
4 star:		(11)
3 star:		(7)
2 star:		(6)
1 star:		(7)

 

 

If you are like me you would pick this book up based soley on the fact that it is marketed (on the author's website among other places) as the 6th book in the Dark Ones Series. And if you are like me you would expect several things:

1. Very average (in looks) and slightly crazy Heroine who still manages to be likable.
2. Hunky Dark One Hero who is a bit emo with a side of angst, and who (through knowing and loving the Heroine)grows emotionally.
3. Slightly annoying side characters that follow the Heroine around to provide comic relief during "serious" times.
4. A HEA (Happily-Ever-After ending).

THIS book had NONE of those things in it (okay well except for #3)

We have Pia, a "Heroine" who is so insecure she bed hops, is so stupid she gets involved in some ridiculous mess that she has no business being in, and who whines about her weight every chance she gets.

We have Kristoff, a "Hero" who is so emotionally scarred by the loss of his girlfriend (not his Beloved, just some chick he's dating) that he is verbally abusive to Pia (his Beloved) and who never really sees the light about what a jerk he is.

We do get the slightly annoying side characters who actually ended up being my favorite part of the book.

And we DO NOT get a HEA. That's right after proving time and again that she is worthy of Kristoff's love, Pia still gets to see him walk away.

Really at that point I was only still reading the blasted book to finally get a better feeling than the ones provide by the rest of the book (i.e. depression, annoyance, anger, sadness, pity). I mean I personally can only read about a person getting their heart stabbed for only so long before I finally throw the book at the wall.

And yes when I got to the end and discovered that unlike the FIVE previous books in the Dark Ones Series, THIS one was not going to end in a HEA (and that I would have to read ANOTHER book featuring characters that THIS book made severaly unlikable) well the book literally hit the wall.

Seriously it was a waste of time, I was annoyed by the false advertisement, baffled how this book could be so different from the others. Romance readers expect a few things when they pick up a book and this book tore those expectations to shreds and NOT in a good way. By the end I hated every single character in the book, Pia was just not someone I could relate to, she had so many TSTL moments I felt like knocking some sense into her. And Kristoff... oy that man had MAJOR issues, and his treatment of Pia was so far across the line that I seriously think he could have happily killed her even after discovering she was his Beloved (now don't get me wrong I kind of wanted to kill her too...) He just was not Hero material.

Well needless to say I am finished with this series and it will be a cold day somewhere very warm before I pick up the second book starring Pia and Kristoff. At this point neither one of them deserves a HEA and I don't think my emotional psyche can take another go around of Pia the Moron and Kirstoff the Jerk.

(And really the fact that the author didn't warn her readers that this book would be so different from the other ones in the series - so that readers like myself would go in knowing what the differences would be - has moved her name from my Auto-Buy List to my Never-Buy List.)

I've always liked Katie MacAlister's books about the "Dark Ones." I bought this book based on the author's name alone. And in the beginning of the novel, I made note of the same elements I've always liked about these novels - less than perfect heroine, hunky hero, zany plot-line, etc. But, for once, the main character was a little too less-than-perfect. She wasn't necessarily someone I would want to be. And I was a little taken aback by the first "love" scene, if that's what you could call it. I don't care how good looking a guy is. I don't think I'd be all that flattered to find him waiting for me in my hotel room - completely naked - when I'd just met him a few hours ago.

For me, Alec wasn't likable at all. He seemed kind of patronizing in his attitude toward Pia. Everytime he would say something to Pia, I would think, "Well, I guess if someone was REALLY good-looking it would be flattering to hear them talk like that to me...maybe." But it was kind of hard to respect a guy that was so way-over-the-top. I kept thinking he must have ulterior motives.

In the end, poor Pia seemed like someone who had sex with anyone who'd take her - whether they liked her or not. Because the other guy didn't seem to like her much either. I kept thinking the situation would resolve itself in some way that would explain why her "Beloved" was acting so cruelly to her. I stayed up late just to get to the end, and "WHAT???" Both men walked away from her - even after she had saved one of them by almost getting herself killed. THEY JUST WALKED AWAY! No good-bye, no thanks, nothing.

In a side note and short reference to the rest of the kind of crazy plot, one of the ghosts who'd been wanting so badly to go to heaven, didn't get to go. All he said was, "Oh well, I like it here." What???

I couldn't sleep for the rest of the night. Where was my happy ending??? I read the excerpt from the next book and things don't look to be much better. I felt like I'd been tricked into one of those "series" books where there's never really a happy ending to the romance - just some hot sex here and there. I want a happy ending for Pia. I will definitely look at the next book when it comes out. But I'm gonna have to check the end to make sure Pia gets her happy ending before I buy it. Because I am not going through this again. And if she doesn't have a happy ending with her hero, I will have to take the "Dark Ones" books off my "must buy" list. I'll avoid them completely.

First, I'm not going to rehash the plot. I mean, not only has that been done in every review, but I refuse to do as each and every reviewer (save one) has done, and reveal the ending. I will say that this is NOT a standalone book, and as evidenced by the other reviews, THAT is its single biggest flaw. It is the beginning of another series, although I don't know the extent of that series (the next book: "Crouching Vampire, Hidden Fang" comes out in May, 2009).

Things I disliked:

I, too, was not aware that this would be a series, and was expecting a stand-alone story. I was dissappointed at the ending because of this. But after some contemplation I felt that it was reasonable to have a continued story (as with many of her books) and recognized that disparaging the entirety of the story because of my disappointment with that aspect wasn't fair. So while I disliked it, for the sake of rating I am ignoring it. It's not as if there won't EVENTUALLY be a happy ending.

Again as other reviewers mentioned, Pia was whiny and waaay too obsessed with ther weight and flaws. Tandem to that, neither of the male leads were able to connect with her for any significant period of time to address that concern. She did some TSTL things, but unlike with other authors, you *kind of* understand that she was baffled and confused, acting on instinct, not knowledge, and that made her more susceptible to stupid actions.

I generally don't care for books that have unnecessary secondary character sex scenes, and I didn't really care for it in this, either. I'm probably using poor phrasing on that, but what I mean is that I don't like the main characters having sex scenes with anyone else within the book. In this case, I cut a little slack, because I see how it was SOMEWHAT necessary for the story. And to further address the erroneous claim that Pia "cheated" on either lead character, she did not. To begin with, there was no actual sex between her and Alec (barely foreplay, people!), and nothing beyond that initial event (oh, wait, they kissed -- sorry, that's not cheating. ESPECIALLY after a one-night-stand). They had a fling as far as she was concerned. Pia appeared to feel guilt about it because of the lack of closure on the evening with Alec, her confusion because of Alec's professions of deep feelings (without understanding about Dark Ones), and because of her behavior with Kristoff (you know, the whole "sleeping with his best friend" thing).

There were little things that gave me some pangs of upset. I, too, was upset when not all of the ghosts made it to Ostri, but once I knew that it wasn't a stand-alone book, I wasn't upset anymore. Just mildly annoyed I suppose. I didn't like the whole "Alec disappears for x amount of time, thinking that leaving a note is okay, and then shows up again as if everything is hunky-dory".

Sounds like a lot of negatives, huh? There are a few reasons for my rating, other than the "likes" that I'm going to list next. Primarily, though, that it was just plain a fun book. I actually laughed out loud at parts (I can't tell you how long it's been!). The sex was, as always, very hot (even the somewhat disjointed foreplay scene). Katie MacAlister is one of the best with sex scenes, although they tend to be a bit formulaic. When they're hot enough, though, I don't really mind. The secondary characters are, as always, great buffers and comic relief.

Okay, things I did like:

So, this falls under a like AND a dislike, I suppose. Kristoff really was pretty obnoxious to Pia. Well, very obnoxious. BUT, since I NOW know that it's a series book, I can accept it better. I actually really liked the whole "she's my Beloved but I didn't know she was going to be" plot-line, since other than in the first Dark One book, they all pretty much know right away when they find their Beloveds. After I got over my initial annoyance at Kristoff, I started seeing something to this. MY interpretation is that he didn't WANT to like his friend's girl. He didn't WANT to get caught up in the swirling emotions of it, and despite being practically unable to control himself, he didn't want to betray Alec. While they had, as they'd said, been with the same women before, he knew Alec saw Pia differently. Also, and this is *just* a supposition, his response was always that he wasn't "expecting" a Beloved. Pia is the one who said that he was hung-up on his ex, he only said he wanted revenge for her. MY interpretation was that there was something, probably related to his work on the council, that either made him in danger, or made it so that it was terrible timing for him to have a Beloved. Even the excerpt from the next book made me think that he was... distracted by something and wasn't able to "talk".

I liked that Alec really thought she was his Beloved. But I suspect there's a deeper storyline with that based on some things said at the end. Again, I don't want to give away any spoilers. Alec was a nice enough guy, but seemed to be the opposite of Kristoff in his rampant desire for a Beloved. I am curious to find out whether the next book goes into more background so that we better understand his motivations.

As usual, I loved the ghosts. I liked the interraction. I am looking forward to seeing the remaining ghost in the next book.

I liked the reference to one of Ms. MacAlister's regency romances. The book in the beginning, described as a regency romance with a dancing couple on the cover, struck me as a reference to "Noble Destiny" (which I disliked, actually). It was clever, although I don't think most people will get the reference.

I really appreciate the fact that Ms. MacAlister is a very good author. I have come across such awful books lately. I was thrilled to have a new book by someone I knew wrote well and that included enough comedy that I would laugh, even if it was just to myself.

Overall I would rate this 3 1/2 stars, but if I'm going to be fair to her, 4 was more accurate than 3. It is SOOOO much better than the vast majority of what is out there. I will reserve full judgement until I read the sequel. For what it's worth, she's still an auto-buy author for me.

To sum up: THIS IS NOT A STAND ALONE BOOK. I think knowing this will save many people disappointment, and allow them to enjoy it more. SEX SCENES ROCKED. Even the one with Alec, which is usually something I don't like i books, was hot and fun. WHILE NOT HER BEST, SO MUCH BETTER THAN OTHER BOOKS OUT THERE THAT IT DOESN'T DESERVE A POOR RATING. I seem, however, to be in the minority in these assessments. *shrug*

Pia Thomason, our heroine, is a pudgy 39 year old from a small town who decides to find some love and adventure by seeing the world as part of a three week group tour to Europe, beginning in Iceland- where it all goes wrong for her. After a slow start in which she eventually is entwined in a case of mistaken identity, is introduced and chased by a zealous religious cult, nonchalantly learns ghosts are real and she needs to help them, and fools around with the naked near stranger in her hotel room, she wakes up the next morning to find a woman she knows from the cult dying in her bathroom and the man she slept with gone for what turns out to be most of the book.

I found it perplexing that while the murderous plot of the book was mostly straight forward, you couldn't fathom who the hero of the book was until nearly half way through it. Two Dark Ones are involved: both the mostly missing Alec who seems a little flighty and appears to fall for Pia straight off though she's a bit tepid about him; and Kristoff who is more mysterious and brooding but not completely likable even to we readers! Eventually it becomes obvious she's meant to be with him from our perspective though both hero and heroine are shocked when this is revealed on the last pages. They don't particularly like one another, so this is no great love for the ages. Kristoff and Alec ditch Pia without a backward glance at the first opportunity. And from the sneak peak of the next book it doesn't look like that will change anytime soon even though Pia is Kristoff's full fledged Beloved, the woman who salvaged his soul.

I have to say I am intrigued and regardless of the very dry start I likely would have given this book four stars if not for the abrupt and horrid way the two main characters part. The two ghosts who are not helped at the end is disturbing as well since they were two of the most likable and main ones. I'll probably pick up the next book when it comes out to see how it ends, but for the love of God could they please stop naming them such ridiculous titles?!

The Entire Dark Ones Series:

A Girl's Guide To Vampires ( Highly Recommended)
Sex and the Single Vampire ( Highly Recommended)
Sex, Lies & Vampires ( Highly Recommended)
Even Vampires Get the Blues
The Last of the Red-Hot Vampires (Not Very Good At All)

This had to be the worst book in the series. Their are plenty of other reviews for this book, so I will make mine short and sweet. Skip this book and the next one. Read the books that came before it and enjoy.

The main character is a complete waste of space, the vampires are either physically abuseive haters or groping love sick morons and the supportive characters have few laughs, little wit or are so shallow that you can guess the outcome of most scenes.

Save you money and skip it.

I've read all of Ms. MacAlister's previous books and generally loved them but they seem to be becoming darker and less entertaining. In the first books, there was always some humor; Jim was indispensable. But this one in particularly was a complete downer. And did we need to know the "hero's" girlfriend had been tortured to death in such detail? I wouldn't recommend this book to anyone.

First let me say that I am a big fan of Katie. On that note that is the only good thing I have to say about it. The Characters are so blind and stupid I would say they don't deserve each other but the fact that they are so stupid lets hope they get together and spare the rest of civilization their melodramatic moping. I will not buy the next you can see from the back cover on her homepage that its the same boring tripe as the first. Blah Blah Blah. There's not even her signature hiliarious antics going on. Even the repeat of previous charectors act as if they got nothing from having a beloved. They just became some sort of dark one robots without their mates. Truely dissappointing. Zen? What zen? Has absolutely nothing to do with the book. Sorry Katie.

I Loved this book - I know a lot of people complained it was a 2 book series but that did not bother me (probably because I did not have to wait a year until the next one was done). I found this one very entertaining and loved the sexual tension between her and Kristoff. The suspense also had me on the edge of my seat - lots of twists and turns. Can't wait to start the next book tonight (:

I can't believe others really liked it. It was not my cup of tea at all. I was bored to tears & wondering when it was going to get good. It never does. I couldn't have cared less about the lead characters. Ugh, really hate time wasters like this.

The characters were so completely unlikable and awful I figured they HAD TO BE the bad guys in the end. Pia is dumb, fat, unattractive, needy, and a push over. Alec was patronizing and annoying. In the second scene when he just arrives at Pia's room naked and assumes he will have sex with her after only meeting her that night and kidnapping her was horrible. Yet, it becomes worse when Pia agrees. Even the sex scene was terrible, and yet she craves and chases after him for the rest of the book. Then there is Kristoff, who was verbally abusive. It's hard to enjoy a storyline when the characters are completely unlikable.

This is the part when I annoy people: I'm tired of all heroines in MacAlister's books to be fat and unattractive. I know most people feel they are fat and unattractive and it is a nice fantasy to believe someone extremely HOT would want them, but hey, why not have fair play. MacAlister can have a beautiful woman fall in love with a fat and unattractive man? What? You don't want a fantasy about a fat and unattractive man? Hmmmm, well that seems a bit unfair, don't you think?