You're Not From Around Here, Are You: A Lesbian in Small-Town America (Living Out: Gay and Lesbian Autobiog) (Paperback)

~ (Author)

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

A pregnant lesbian living in the middle of God's country: it sounds like the premise of a sitcom, but this personal narrative of love and childbirth in Wellsboro, Penn., is by turns poignant and wonderfully witty. Blum (Amnesty), a novelist and college professor, recounts the difficulties that being gay presents when one simply wants to get a mortgage, fix up a house and attend Lamaze classes in a small town. But to Blum's credit, this is no rose-colored, resolutely middle-class, "we're just like everyone else" kind of gay autobiography. She is refreshingly honest not only regarding her ambivalence about having children, but also regarding the sexual tensions the pregnancy causes in her relationship with her partner. Her descriptions of finding a sperm donor are hilarious ("He's attractive, I'd think, shaking someone's hand. I wonder what his sperm count is?"). And the book is filled with touching surprises such as that Blum doesn't admit to herself that she's gay until a year after moving in with her lover. With astonishing resilience, she describes her family's close-mindedness, as well as the prejudice she encounters from the townspeople she'd come to trust. Unfortunately, there's no escaping the miniature terrors of small-town life; as Blum points out, describing a trip across America, "Wellsboro is everywhere."

Copyright 2001 Cahners Business Information, Inc.

--This text refers to the Hardcover edition.

From Library Journal

For most Americans, relocating to a small town, getting married, and starting a family is a clich . For gays, lesbians, bisexuals, and transgendered people fearing isolation, ostracism, and worse such a step requires courage. Blum and her partner meet with obstacles not experienced by most Americans, as when they decide Blum will undergo alternative insemination and they are refused service by the first doctor they go to. After she gets pregnant, Blum is subjected to a hate sheet put out by students speculating that her child will be deformed. Even the couple's friends and supporters can't fathom the depth of their vulnerability. Blum's memoir ends at the birth of the couple's daughter, just when it becomes even more interesting: what is it like for a child to grow up with gay parents in small-town America? Blum's at times cautionary tale will be a reality check for LGBT readers and an eye-opener for straight ones. Recommended for all collections. Ina Rimpau, Newark P.L., NJ
Copyright 2001 Reed Business Information, Inc.

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Product Details

• Paperback: 272 pages
• Publisher: University of Wisconsin Press; 1 edition (April 8, 2001)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0299170942
• ISBN-13: 978-0299170943
• Product Dimensions: 8.9 x 6 x 0.5 inches
• Shipping Weight: 13.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (5 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #924,957 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

15 of 15 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Really a great book, June 15, 2001

By A Customer

I was a student at the university where Ms. Blum taught while she was pregnant. Working in the book business, I stumbled upon an advertisement for this title in the publishers' catalog. (Of all catalogs to accidentally be placed in my mailbox, of all the pages the catalog could have opened to when it fell out of my mailbox, and of all the things that usually distract me from noticing a name I found familiar - it's a wonder all the pieces fell in place.) Anyway, I immediately ordered the book - if for no other reason than for the fact that it intertwined with my personal history with the university and the Pennsylvania towns she writes about. But I think the book is more than a piece of history. Her words are fluid and poetic. I gobbled up the chapters as if it were chocolate-y fiction, sneaking it in between breaks at work. It speaks to me as a woman, as a "non-traditional" worshipper of religious faith, and as someone who hopes to have her own children someday. I would, and have, recommended this memoir to many people.

5 of 5 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Must have read for Lesbian Moms-to-be, December 3, 2002

By	Tina Ireland "Bored paralegal" (MO) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

I picked up this book while wondering aimlessly through the aisle at the local library. I thought it would be something to pass the time. Needless the say, the book draws you in, makes you laugh, cry and get angry, all while thinking to yourself "I've been there before". I truly enjoyed the book and would gladly recommend it to all women, whether you are a lesbian or not.

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars One book...so many emotions!, July 7, 2005

By	L. A. Garner "Avid reader and bunny mom" - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

I hope my review isn't seen as less credible because of this, but I know Louise, her wife, and their amazing daughter. She attended a summer camp where I was a counselor and I have to say that she's the most self-actualized individual I have ever known. She's an amazing person, due in no small part to what her moms have gone through in bringing her into the world. :)

I'd been wanting to read this book for quite a while once I realized it was out there. I was amazed at how this slim volume brought such a myriad of emotions to the surface. One minute I was laughing, the next minute I was so sad, then I was angry and militant, then disgusted at the evil of some people, then comforted by the love that Connie and Louise obviously share. It's a great book...with a wonderful, frank, conversational style that doesn't hide the facts, but doesn't spare the rich details. You feel like you are right there with them. The dialogue is honest and fleshed out very well. No small wonder, considering Louise's writing abilities!

Whether you are gay or straight, consider reading this book. It will help you understand how hard it is to be gay and how wonderful it is as well. And hopefully, it might make you see that it doesn't matter what sexual orientation parents have...just that they truly love and want their children. :)