Mennonite in a Little Black Dress: A Memoir of Going Home (Hardcover)

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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Starred Review. At first, the worst week of Janzen's life—she gets into a debilitating car wreck right after her husband leaves her for a guy he met on the Internet and saddles her with a mortgage she can't afford—seems to come out of nowhere, but the disaster's long buildup becomes clearer as she opens herself up. Her 15-year relationship with Nick had always been punctuated by manic outbursts and verbally abusive behavior, so recognizing her co-dependent role in their marriage becomes an important part of Janzen's recovery (even as she tweaks the 12 steps just a bit). The healing is further assisted by her decision to move back in with her Mennonite parents, prompting her to look at her childhood religion with fresh, twinkling eyes. (She provides an appendix for those unfamiliar with Mennonite culture, as well as a list of shame-based foods from hot potato salad to borscht.) Janzen is always ready to gently turn the humor back on herself, though, and women will immediately warm to the self-deprecating honesty with which she describes the efforts of friends and family to help her re-establish her emotional well-being. (Oct.)
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Review

“Wonderfully intelligent and frank. . . . Mennonite in a Little Black Dress is snort-up-your-coffee funny, breezy yet profound, and poetic without trying. . . . [Janzen’s] tone reminds me of Garrison Keillor’s deadpan, affectionate, slightly hyperbolic stories about urbanities and Minnesota Lutherans. . . I loved this book, and Rhoda Janzen. She is a terrific, pithy, beautiful writer, a reliable, sympathetic narrator and a fantastically good sport.”—Kate Christensen, New York Times Book Review

 

“Hilarious and touching.”—People (four stars)

 

“Mennonite in a Little Black Dress is a hilarious collection of musings on Janzen’s childhood, marriage, and eccentric family. . . . Janzen mines Mennonite culture for comic effect, but she does so with love.”—Entertainment Weekly

 

“Janzen looks at her childhood religion with fresh, twinkling eyes. . . . Janzen is always ready to gently turn the humor back on herself, though, and women will immediately warm to the self-deprecating honesty with which she describes the efforts of friends and family to help her re-establish her emotional well-being.”—Publishers Weekly (starred review)

 

“[A] spirited, fascinating memoir. . . . Janzen’s story reminds us what a beautiful gift our past can be.”—Hannah Sampson, Miami Herald

 

“Hysterical. . . . In the tradition of David Sedaris, it’s [Janzen’s] family who is the source of the book’s biggest laughs, and its heart.”—Marisa Meltzer, The Daily Beast

 

“Rhoda’s life may not sound amusing at first: She’s a poet/professor whose husband just left her for Bob, whom he met on Gay.com. But what happens after she heads home to her Mennonite parents is beyond funny. Her wry, affectionate depictions of her frugal dad, sweet but slightly scatological mom and a youth in which jeans and dancing were off limits make for an honest and entertaining memoir.”—Family Circle

 

“This soulful, affecting first memoir . . . will enchant anyone who has ever gone back home after suffering a setback.”—Library Journal (starred review)

 

“This book is not just beautiful and intelligent, but also painfully -- even wincingly -- funny. It is rare that I literally laugh out loud while I'm reading, but Rhoda Janzen's voice -- singular, deadpan, sharp-witted and honest -- slayed me, with audible results. I have a list already of about fourteen friends who need to read this book. I will insist that they read it. Because simply put, this the most delightful memoir I've read in ages.”—Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat, Pray, Love

 

“Compelling . . . Janzen explores her past and her present with honesty and self-deprecation and the result is both hilarious and touching . . . [A] lively chronicle of the patience and strong sense of humor one needs to go home again.”—Booklist

 

“Readers will find themselves laughing out loud at Janzen’s wry commentary. . . . The playful humor is balanced, however, with genuine thoughtfulness, especially as Janzen reconnects with childhood companions and reflects on how different her own life might have been, had she chosen to remain in the Mennonite community instead of embracing an intellectual life. Mennonite in a Little Black Dress will resonate with any reader who has ever thought about how such choices shape our futures, or with anyone who has struggled to recapture faith—in God, in other people or in oneself.”—Norah Piehl, Bookpage

 

“Janzen excavates her past with the might of a backhoe and the finesse of an archaeologist’s brush. . . . The author’s relatives feature prominently throughout the narrative, her mother’s quirky sensibilities bubbling over in merry nuggets of old-fashioned, home-spun wisdom. . . . A buoyant, somewhat mordant ramble through triumphs, upheavals and utter normalcy.”—Kirkus Reviews

 

“This is an intelligent, funny, wonderfully written memoir.  Janzen has a gift for following her elegant prose with the perfect snarky aside.  If it weren't for the weird Mennonite food, I would like very much to be her friend.”—Cynthia Kaplan, author of Why I'm Like This and Leave the Building Quickly

 

“Rhoda Janzen, a stunning woman, has written a funny book, very funny when she gets to cranking on her family, and she gets to cranking.  The writing enjoys the exactitude of poetry, and the comedic melody runs over a bass line of intellection that makes things gratifying in ways lesser books are not. Spectacular merde falls into this life.  It's a marvelous book of brave cheer.”—Padgett Powell, author of The Interrogative Mood

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Product Details

• Hardcover: 256 pages
• Publisher: Henry Holt and Co.; 1 edition (October 13, 2009)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 080508925X
• ISBN-13: 978-0805089257
• Product Dimensions: 8.1 x 5.8 x 1 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1.1 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 3.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (73 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #5,284 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

67 of 71 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars WHEN LEMONS TURN INTO LEMONADE, August 27, 2009

By	gail powers "Abra" (Harbor County, MI and N. Naples, FL) - See all my reviews

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My expectations for this book? I assumed that this would be an account of returning to one's roots after going out into the real world. Beyond that rather banal description I assumed I'd get special incites into the Mennonite world, including possible rituals and practices with a horse drawn carriage or two thrown in and an account of farm life.
In reality, this is a personal memoir that provides info. about carriages and Mennonite culture with food and recipes thrown in for a bit of flavor. However, at the heart of the matter is this wonderful account of how a series of unfortunate incidents brought the author back home. What I find completely amazing is that when even dealing with really serious or sad issues, Rhoda Janzen does it with such incredible style and humor that I found myself chuckling.
Janzen's writing style is coversational. Her sentences are complex and descriptive, but they flow easily. Best of all, it passed my acid test. Normally if I can't get involved in a book within 20 minutes, that's it. I put it down and don't invest further time or effort.
This book on some level reads like fiction. It's like a really good box of chocolates. I couldn't put it down. I loved the eccentricities of her friends and family. I LOVED THIS BOOK.

12 of 13 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Emotional but Never Sappy, Nostalgic but Rarely Romantic, November 2, 2009

By	Bookreporter.com (New York, New York) - See all my reviews

Despite small rebellions, Rhoda Janzen stayed close to the Mennonite world she was raised in. That is, until she went to graduate school. At that point, too many of her social, philosophical and spiritual ideas were challenged, causing her life to become more secular. But she never severed ties with her family or the Mennonite community, so when crisis struck in the form of a divorce followed by a debilitating car accident, she was welcomed home with open arms. Her memoir, MENNONITE IN A LITTLE BLACK DRESS, centers on that homecoming but also celebrates a religious community more vibrant and diverse than most people realize.

Janzen may have been primed for the secular world unwittingly by her parents, both of whom were college educated (something very unusual for Mennonites). She and her three siblings were sent to public school and were allowed some spiritual and intellectual freedoms by their thoughtful yet conservative parents. Though her parents may have been inwardly disappointed by her choices to become a poet/professor and to marry the emotionally uneven Nick, they wanted her to be happy and were kindhearted when her turbulent marriage fell apart. In her early 40s, Janzen found herself back in her parents' home, enveloped in a life of German folk songs, strudel, borscht, traditional handicrafts and pious religious beliefs.

With biting humor and unflinching honesty, Janzen chronicles her divorce (the verbally abusive Nick left her for Bob from [...]) and shares childhood adventures and misadventures growing up Mennonite. And although it's Janzen's memoir, the star of the book is quite often her mother, Mary. Mary is funny, warm, and much sassier and worldlier than readers would ever expect. Janzen is tender towards her parents and Mennonite "oldsters" in general, nicely balancing out the tale of marital woe and strife.

MENNONITE IN A LITTLE BLACK DRESS moves back and forth in time from Janzen's childhood to her current life. Her relationships with academia, religion, siblings, her ethnic heritage, and more are explored sharply --- and, at times, too briefly --- and with an interesting perspective and voice. Mennonite life (at least Janzen's Mennonite life) is brought into sharp relief, and all the gender inequalities, dogma and expectations are contrasted with moments of touching warmth, hilarity and unconditional love.

From "the top five shame-based foods for Mennonite youth lunches" to living with a bipolar spouse, from the practice of marrying first cousins to the joy of racquetball, MENNONITE IN A LITTLE BLACK DRESS is pleasantly all over the place. Janzen's style is often conversational, and she masterfully turns phrases, finding the humor in pain and sorrow and the sacred in the ordinary.

While sorting through the wreckage of 15 years married to Nick and recovering from the car accident, Janzen is sorting through her relationship to the Mennonite Church. Her memoir is emotional but never sappy, nostalgic but rarely romantic. Janzen is likable, smart, funny and humble. She is unapologetic in her quest to balance out the best of the Mennonite world with the best of the secular world. Readers will be charmed by this quirky, powerful and unique tale of family, acceptance, identity and belief.

--- Reviewed by Sarah Rachel Egelman

26 of 33 people found the following review helpful:

3.0 out of 5 stars Good, but..., September 7, 2009

By	Rushmore (CHICAGO, IL United States) - See all my reviews

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Such a crazy situation to be in, and it's a memoir, so it presumably really happened. In this situation it's all about the author's voice - and unfortunately Janzen's voice didn't come through for me. I laughed out loud several times in the first couple of chapters, and not much after that. I think ultimately this book was an effort by Janzen to exorcise her demons. That's fine, but it doesn't always make compelling reading. The reviewer who pointed out Janzen's smug tone was spot-on. Her mom sounds adorable, and her siblings and siblings-in-law are intriguing, but sometimes they come across as just funny material for Janzen's book. I was confused. Am I supposed to sympathize with Janzen? Admire her? How do I really feel about her? Mostly I'm kind of angry that she uses words I don't know. If you are going to read this book, either get it on Kindle so you can look up words, or keep a dictionary Handy (too much of a hassle for me). So I guess since she is using big words she must also be viewing herself as a case study and analyzing herself in a philosophical fashion.

The problem is that I did not feel much real affection from Janzen. Maybe a little for her sisters-in-law. But I think if I had basically renounced my Mennonite lifestyle and made a mess of life on the outside, and then returned to my roots to get myself straight again, I might be a little concerned about what my family and friends thought of me. Obviously if I returned I might be looking for their help to make sense of my life. I did not get any hint of Janzen reaching out. It was as though she still felt like she could fix herself and would interact with others only on her own terms. In the meantime she basks in the attention she garners because of her situation.

A memoirist leaves herself open to being judged personally as well as technically. In this case, Janzen has a great plot but unfortunately falls short on character. I can't recommend this book.