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Hard to Love: Understanding and Overcoming Male Borderline Personality Disorder Paperback – May 13, 2014

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4.3 out of 5 stars 21 customer reviews
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 192 pages
  • Publisher: Central Recovery Press (May 13, 2014)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1937612570
  • ISBN-13: 978-1937612573
  • Product Dimensions: 0.8 x 6 x 9.2 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 6.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.3 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (21 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #492,235 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Top Customer Reviews

3.0 out of 5 starsJust one kin dof BPD
By Catherine Gallanti on November 5, 2014
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
Only highlights one type of man with BPD. Not all BPDs are crazy jealous and possessive. Some are intimacy phobic, fear engulfment and act out need for intimacy/fear of intimacy polarity, commitment/freedom issues and start fights over the smallest thing as cant stand any kids of stability for too long. Its like being dragged through a thorn field by a wild tiger and the relationship never settles. In general these kinds of relationships are exhuasting for the non-BPD partner, as stability is never reached and one goes from crisis to drama, cycle never ending.
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5.0 out of 5 starsA Great Book
By Billy on July 30, 2014
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
As a man with BPD this book has been very helpful and informative to me. A great read and I would recommend it to anyone. Whether you have BPD or love someone who does or even someone with BPD traits, this book is great. It has certainly helped me in my recovery process.
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3.0 out of 5 starssome traits very good fulfilled
By marce on July 20, 2015
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
But I think there is the another traits missing. The book treat the "don't leave me trait" of the MBPD: jealousy, needed; but not the "I hate you", when the man turns anger, inaccessible, distrustful and feels invaded, the book does not show how to treat this part.
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5.0 out of 5 starsMale perspective on Borderline Personality Disorder.
By Sparky on April 3, 2015
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
One of the best & freshest books on Borderline Personality Disorder. Usually books on BPD are geared toward women. This is a "keeper". Makes it easier to understand BPD, which is a very difficult area of study.
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5.0 out of 5 starsFinally - a book about BPD in men
By Trixie Hollingsworth on October 28, 2015
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
This is the first book I have seen that addresses the reality of borderline personality disorder in men. Such a treatment is badly needed, given the almost exclusive emphasis on women in discussions of BPD and the fact that there are differences in the way it manifests in men.

The author makes effective use of case studies to illustrate both the circumstances that may lead to BPD and specific approaches for addressing BPD thinking and behavior in men. The book is written so that it is helpful for both the man with BPD and those surrounding him, especially partners and spouses.

Hard to Love is hopeful in the sense that it considers BPD on a spectrum and offers suggestions for changing negative beliefs and behaviors in cases where that may be possible. "Hard to love" is different from "impossible to love" and the author is clear about that distinction. I recommend reading this in conjunction with the NEW edition of I Hate You - Don't Leave Me, another book that offers a hopeful, strategy-oriented approach to dealing with BPD.
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4.0 out of 5 starsFour Stars
By Terry Cormier on November 5, 2015
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Writing is more clinical than I would have liked. A little hard to understand.
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3.0 out of 5 starsThree Stars
By William A. Cox on February 10, 2015
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A little simplistic for such a deep disorder
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4.0 out of 5 starsVery good but additional information desired
By C. S. Leigh on January 8, 2015
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
I'm giving an extra star because there is currently so little material out there regarding borderline personality disorder in men, and overall this is an excellent resource that provides a good deal of insight and advice on a subject that is not very well understood even by many specialists. However there is one very important omission from this book and for that reason I would otherwise rate it three stars. Surprisingly, there is virtually no analysis of how "victims" of this terrible disorder can accept, overcome, and repair the relationship with their parents or guardians, which lies at the heart of the problem in the first place. Other books written from a similar perspective usually provide advice on managing the relationship and mitigating the pain and stress that such dysfunctional relationships inflict on the patient, but this book only provided this kind of discussion with regards to one's children, not one's parents (presumably because the author's experience only involved the former). I also found it remarkably troubling when the author stated that the most severe cases might truly be "impossible to love" while at the same time emphasizing the importance of maintaining confidence in recovery throughout the book; I can only assume it was an oversight. Nevertheless I'm satisfied with my purchase and would still recommend it to those who want to learn more about this subject.
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