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8 of 10 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
If high cholesterol can't stop Seagal, 2 serial killers don't stand a chance, October 24, 2008
We believe October is the time to get in as many horror films as possible. As the weather cools down and jack-o-laterns burn on peoples doorsteps there really is no better way to go. However there are times when you must make an exception, especially when you see an increasingly obese Seagal starring in a new realease. It's just a no brainer. In fact we were just having a discusion in hopes Seagal would come out with a new flick and within a week Kill Switch appeared. Judging by the 5 stars you may think "Has Seagal finally turned his career back on track?" Well the answer is no. He's still pumping out horrible films, but this one was so hilarious it could't recieve anything thing less then 5. The lines were tougher then ever, the dialogue more confusing then ever, and Seagal was fatter then ever. This is the only way we would break up the October horror fest for an action feature.
This one starts with a flashback of two twins playing hide and seek at a brithday party while some freak hiding out in the woods watches. This guys looks like he stepped off the set of To Catch a Predator and is on the run from Chris Hansen and the cop dressed up like swamp thing. He eventually catches one of the twins and kills him while the other one watches. Now fast forward to current day where you learn the living twin is Seagal who still struggles with the murder by drowning himself in Jim Beam. He plays nation feared homocide detective Jacob Stillwell who is well known for his strong arm tactics, even if all his fights scenes are done by a stunt double. The first taste we get of his toughness is when he's called into a situation where killer Billy Joel Hill has stiched a bomb to a womans chest with about 2 minutes remaining before she explodes. Stillwell evaluates the issue and decides he must difuse the bomb by beating the tar out of Billy until he tells which wire to cut. He bursts into a hotel room where Billy awaits and they start to rumble. This fight scene is so funny. Seagal is throwing this guy into every wall of the room and then allows his stunt double to do all the intense brawling. Never before has a double been so obvious in a film. As stillwell rains down blows upon him he finally gets Billy to tell him which wire. Once the wire is clipped there is only 1 second left despite the fight scene lasted for about 5 minutes. To seal the scene Stillwell kicks the killer out of a four story window where he lands on his face, yet survives. Hey it's a Seagal film so anything can happen.
After a long day Stillwell heads home where his cop partner/love interest awaits looking to get it on only to get shut down (Yeah thats realistic). He needs to continue his work to find a killer known as Lazereus and heds down to the morgue to meet up with his coroner buddy Issac Hayes. We can only hope this wasn't Issacs last performance. Once at the morgue another body turns up appearing to be a victim of Lazereus. As Stillwell and Issac Hayes try to crack the case we noticed a microphone hanging down in plain view. One of the best moments in the movie. It was in 2 shots then disappeared in the third so we knew it was a complete mistake. Big star for the editor on this one. As Stilwell and his partner continue on they get hot on the trail of Lazereus but he continues to get away and the bodies continue to pile up. While he gathers clues to stop the next murder he finds out Billy got released which bring him one step closer to his massive heart attack. Finally he cathces Lazereus in a bar and gives him the beat down of a life time sending him to prison. Once he heads home he sees his lover dead from stab wounds by the hands of Billy. As he turns to hit the door Billy jumps at him for round 2. But it's a Seagal flick so you know what happens. He rips the guy to shreds then kills him leaving a note behind saying he was done. Seems he made peace with his inner demons and will retire to only get even bigger.
Kill Switch has recieved awful reviews but we just loved it. It wasn't good by any normal movie sense but from a b standpoint it was pure genius. The fight scenes were the funniest we've seen from Seagal in a while. It seems like the stunt double is in the film as much as he is. For anyone who wants to sit back with some friends, a couple pizzas, a gang of brews, and laugh all night then this one's your vehicle baby. It'll take you anywhere you want to go.
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5 of 6 people found the following review helpful:
3.0 out of 5 stars
SEMI SEAGAL, October 14, 2008
The career of action film star Steven Seagal has had enough ups and downs to appear like a rollercoaster ride in one of any hundred theme parks across the country. Beginning in 1988 with ABOVE THE LAW, Seagal burst upon the scene as a martial arts master in a film that featured plot, good acting and enough action that involved non-hand to hand combat to keep audiences screaming for more.
With each new film, Seagal developed more mystery about his personal life, played roles that were a little deeper and eventually was able to parlay his clout to make films that followed items dear to his heart. Unfortunately the more he did so, the smaller the crowds to his films.
In recent years Seagal's films have taken on that dreaded identity of direct to DVD features, movies that play in either no theater or limited run. This doesn't mean that the quality is lacking all the time, just that the studio behind it has less faith in the films than Seagal does. So he has kept making them knowing fans would show.
Fans support him enough that a book has recently been released, SEAGALOGY: A STUDY OF THE A** KICKING FILMS OF STEVEN SEAGAL by Vern, a contributing writer for the ain't it cool news web site. The book covers Seagal's films from beginning to end. But I'm not sure that it included the newest release, KILL SWITCH.
Seagal plays Jacob King, a detective working in Memphis, TN, and hot on the trail of a serial killer. The film opens on a case where a psycho has implanted C4 explosives in a young woman's chest with a timer set to go off in minutes. Confronting the killer, King beats a confession out of him in time to save the girl while inflicting enough damage to require medical support for said killer.
The scene moves to another serial killer on the lose, this one having wracked up 4 bodies to date with one on the way. Using astrological signs and leaving clues to what he is up to, including a coded cipher, King attempts to figure out his prey and take him off the street.
Due to his handling of the last killer though, King now has an FBI agent hot on his tail, Agent Frankie Miller (Holly Dignard). Suspicious of King, raw to the ways of the street, she finds herself at odds with him non-stop. While commanded to co-operate, King does his best to find the killer at the cost of relations with the FBI.
The clues mount up as does the body count. And when the first killer is released due to the coercive tactics of King, he ends up dealing with both killers before the films end.
The movie offers a decent plotline, written by Seagal himself. The action sequences fluctuate between dynamic and lame. Seagal is best when he does all of the work himself, including stunts. Fight sequences where an obvious stand in takes his place seem weak while the scenes with Seagal facing the camera and doing the moves he's made famous bring a reality to it. One has to wonder why this is. With the abilities there, why resort to unfit replicas?
One of the bad things involving the fight sequences is the use of what seems to be hiccup cutting of scenes. The same shots pushed back to immediate back, fast cuts of repeated blows and a close up shooting of intimate fight scenes that were my biggest complaint in the mega hit BOURNE films. Back off and let us see the action!
Seagal's acting has been worse and better. He coasts along easily as King, using a Cajun style twang to make him seem different than usual. And King's secret past leads one to suspect that perhaps he isn't who he seems.
The other actors range from an even keel to some of the worst one line roles seen. Unconvincing would be the nicest way to put it. But all in all this movie is not the terrible film that some seem to think. And if you're a Seagal fan, you should be pleased.
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9 of 13 people found the following review helpful:
3.0 out of 5 stars
Switch it off!, August 9, 2008
Another month, another release from The Fat Lord. Granted, his recent output has mainly been in the realm of cheap and badly made direct to video stinkers that arrive with a conveyor belt type mentality, but luckily for his fan(s) on this occasion - you maybe in for a treat that only the portly lord can serve up!
The story (I use that term loosely) has the fat one playing hot shot cop Jacob Stillwell, who is haunted by the childhood death of his brother. This loss has obviously affected him - to the point where he dedicates his life bringing his unorthodox methods of crime fighting (namely punching, kicking and shooting every bad guy he meets) to the mean streets of Memphis. It is here, where he becomes embroiled in the Lazarus case - a killer stalking men and women and only our rotund avenger is the only man who can stop him.
From here on in it's the usual Seagal fare: stupid leather jacket (check), sweaty forehead (check), hair that looks like a dead badger taped to his skull (check), mumbling incoherently to the point of subtitles (check) and the new inclusion of girlfriends who seem to be just out of high school. I know its The Fat Lord, but c'mon, this really is wishful thinking! However, Seagal does throw in a doozy: Its his accent! Attempting (again, I use that term loosely) a southern drawl that is both fascinating and stupid at the same time. Combining this with his usual mumbling and you really do have a stumbling block in terms of character development. Not that The Fat Lord really needs that; especially when all he really does is hit people every 2 or 3 minutes. Infact, the fight sequences are so plentiful and long in this movie, you actually forgot by the end of them why he is fighting these people - yes, it's that kind of movie.
Throw into this the worst supporting actors I have seen in a long time (his partner and boss seem to be in 2 different movies altogether) and a pacing style that stretches the boundaries of your finger and the fast forward button and you really do have a good ol' time with the Seagal.
From the review, you may get the impression I don't like this movie - far from it! It's easily his most entertaining flick in ages (bar the semi return to form of 'Urban Justice') due to its bizarre acting and over the top violence. I have to be honest, I have been having trouble with his direct to video output as most of them have been utter bobbins - but, the sheer lunacy of his accent, his jacket, the way he holds a gun and the fact that his hands are SO BIG, mobile phones look like they are from Toys R Us when he talks into them - 'Kill Switch' delivers in more ways than one! Plus, it has the best ending I have seen for years - if you see it coming, then you are a better man than me. You must be Seagal. Don't bother renting, go straight to buy.
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