Most Helpful Customer Reviews
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48 of 59 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars
shockingly awful, August 11, 2003
There's nothing more awful than a comedy that isn't funny. Apparently the folks who made Galaxina were going for a kind of space-movie parody with sex, but there is exactly ONE funny bit in the movie. The bikers on the distant planet who worship Harley Davidson by bowing down to a motorcycle and going "Vroom! Vroom!" That's it. It lasts about 10 seconds, and pfft, end of funny. Quite honestly, has there EVER been a funny space-movie parody besides "Galaxy Quest?" Ever? Nope. And this one isn't either. The jokes are so bad, and so labored, and take so long to arrive, and are delivered so badly, that it's agonizing.The sex part? THERE ISN'T ANY. Not unless you count the scene in the space bordello, which is neither sexy nor funny. So the movie fails on both counts; it's not funny, and it's not sexy. It just sort of flops around from disconnected scene to disconnected scene. All the guys in the movie are slimy cheeseballs with open shirts and ASCOTS. And then there's Avery Schreiber. Avery Schreiber. Who told this guy he was funny? Can we sue them? Was he funny? Ever? And what was this movie shot on? I mean, the whole film is blurry. It's out of focus all the way through. I've seen MP3's with better image resolution than this movie. The only thing that might make this dreadful failure worth watching at all, for even five seconds, is Dorothy Stratton. Poor Dorothy. She can't act, of course, but she is beautiful, even in the sublimely stupid outfits they put her in here. And she goes through this thing like a trooper, doing exactly what she's supposed to, which is act like a robot. Trust me, this movie's not even good no matter how many of whatever substances you imbibe. It's too awful to even make fun of. It's just plain awful. Unless you are absolutely obsessed with Dorothy Stratton or you have some weird need to collect every bad science fiction movie ever made, avoid this like the plague.
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15 of 17 people found the following review helpful:
3.0 out of 5 stars
Funny movie, March 17, 1999
By A Customer
This is a cult classic, stupid movie. Avery Schreiber commands the Space Police cruiser Infinity and her crew of idiots. Infinity and her crew are near the end of their seven year mission when the police chief sends them on a jouney to rescue the Blue Star from a planet of crooks. The journey will last fifty-four years total. Along the way, Sgt. Thor falls in love with the ships robot, Galaxina (Stratton). The plot is classic B-movie, the one-liners are great and Stratton looks good in her tight satin jump suit. Who could ask for more?
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10 of 11 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars
So Horrible, It's Wonderful!!, August 20, 2006
An outer space film starring Avery Schreiber as Captain Cornelius Butt, "Galaxina" is highly underrated as movie schlock goes. It's so INCREDIBLY bad that it's irresistable. Although it WAS created to spoof Star Trek, Star Wars, Alien, and such, it unfortunately is SO badly written that only lots of heavy drinking will relieve the pain it induces. Be ready. This film makes "Spaceballs," which was one of Mel Brooks' weaker spoofs, look like pure genius.
Examples of how bad it really is?
- The character "Mr. Spot" has ears that point downward and, just in case you didn't get the joke, wears a turtleneck shirt with an upside down Starfleet badge.
- The primary bad guy looks like something out of The Mikado instead of an evil space alien.
- Look for the Batmobile...on the Western set that is supposed to be one of the planets.
- Neither Galaxina, the robotic space babe (voluptuous Playboy playmate Dorothy Stratten, who was murdered shortly after the film was released), nor her hunky love interest, Thor, have any funny lines. None. Those were all apparently "reserved" for Avery Schreiber (Captain Butt), although his are so bad that they probably should have been scrubbed, as well.
- Thor is repeatedly rebuffed, in his advances upon Galaxina, by her built-in electric shock force field. The maximum laughter potential here comes from a "No wonder I'm Thor" line the first time it happens. That's it, except they attempt different versions of that multiple times....and it's almost as much of a gutbuster in the film as my description here is.
I do suggest you see this, because it's too awful not to. Buy it? Well...only if you have the devoted taste for absurdly bad movies and TV shows that I do. Ohhh, the pain. The pain!!!!
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