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4 of 5 people found the following review helpful:
2.0 out of 5 stars
Sparkly vampires!, September 27, 2009
Like Harry Potter and "Eragon" and other such younger-reader literary phenomena, Stephanie Meyers' bestselling vampire romance "Twilight" has gotten the big-screen treatment.
Will its countless fans love it? Undoubtedly. Will the rest of the world love it? Ehhhhhhh... probably not.
Basically liking "Twilight" all depends on whether the idea of teenage vampire/mortal romances with no sex and lots of longing looks appeal to you. It's essentially a teenage fantasy about finding the Perfect Hot Immortal Coverboy Who Longs For You Alone, and as such, it's neither amazingly good nor hilariously bad -- just sort of blah.
On her first day at her new school, klutzy Bella Swan (Kristen Stewart) is struck by the ash-pale, vaguely incestuous Cullen family -- an especially by the Hawt and Brooding Edward Cullen (Robert Pattinson). Edward doesn't seem to like her much -- but when Bella is nearly killed by a runaway car, he somehow manages to zip across the parking lot and knock away the car.
Bella does some speculation about how Edward did this particular trick, throwing off some Superman/Spiderman comparisons. "But what if I'm not the hero? What if I am the bad guy?" he asks. Of course Bella believes he could never be, because he's hot. Er, because she trusts him because he's hot. Umm... never mind. Anyway, Bella eventually figures out that he's a vampire-- a "vegetarian vampire" with the power to read thoughts... except hers.
Despite his fears that he'll hurt her, their smoldering chemistry (and Bella's "heroin" smell) draws them into a relationship... at which point, since the plot has had zero non-teenybopper tension, three two-dimensionally evil vampires enter the scene, intent on hunting Bella. The Cullens whisk her away to keep her safe from this trio -- but they have more than one way to find her.
The book "Twilight" is essentially the eroticized fantasies of a teenage girl, purple of prose and taking itself hilariously seriously. Director Catherine Hardwicke and screenwriter Melissa Rosenberg thankfully remove most of the sentimental drippiness and damselly distress, but Hardwicke's "Twilight" focuses more on the stars' pretty faces than on their personalities. Or the plot.
Hardwicke paints the whole movie in dreary shades of misty grey and blue, which has a certain appropiate visual prettiness. Too bad about the choppy, jerky fight scenes and appalling CGI, including a unintentionally silly "vampire baseball" scene. Think supersonic pitching. Add that to some oatmeal-bland dialogue ("This kind of stuff just doesn't exist!" "It does in my world"), and you don't exactly have a winner.
The biggest problem is the plot: it goes nowhere fast. "Twilight" is your basic teenage romance -- angst, whining and OMG-does-he-like-me-does-he-hate-me? -- except that the Hawt Guy is a vampire, and the only real obstacle to their Eternal Luv is that he can't make up his mind about whether to date her or not. This is not terribly riveting as a story, especially since it's glaringly obvious whether they'll get together or not.
To make matters worse, the main source of tension is the cliche sex = bloodsucking formula, where Edward is constantly shying away from Bella's virginal neck (what does that imply about sucking blood from animals?). Hardwicke wrings a few pretty moments from the movie -- such as Edward and Bella in the Northwestern pine treetops -- but her skills seem to be stifled. You can only wring so much interest from "Meet the Vampire Family."
The talented Pattinson is undeniably a beautiful guy, and he has the bad boy thing down to a fine art. Unfortunately Edward doesn't call for much more -- Pattinson broods, smolders and stalks Bella as a sign of how he loves her. Stewart does a passable job as the rather flat Bella Swan (whose main ambition in life seems to be eternal undeadhood with Eddie-boy), but it's hard to forget that that she's basically playing a self-insert for the masses.
Those who adore the works of Stephanie Meyer and dream of eternal love with an Immortal Hottie may find "Twilight" a delight, but it's no more than a thin, flat guilty pleasure at best.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars
Twilight, October 23, 2009
While not as close to the first book as I'd like, it's a pretty good movie. When I initially saw it, I really disliked it but my friend told me to give it another chance and he was right, the more you watch it, the more it grows on you. Pretty good interpretation of the story, if not completely accurate, but what based-on-a-book movies are?
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars
Not the book - but for the movie good, July 7, 2009
Of course it doesn't follow the book like every book lovers wish. But as a movie it holds its own for entertainment. I wish the relationship with the rest of the family went deeper in the movie but surely they will have to work on that for the next movies since it is so important in the following books.
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by Stephenie Meyer
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