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eHarmony Guide to Dating the Second Time Around Paperback – February 1, 2011


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eHarmony Guide to Dating the Second Time Around + Date or Soul Mate?: How to Know if Someone is Worth Pursuing in Two Dates or Less + Falling in Love for All the Right Reasons: How to Find Your Soul Mate
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 224 pages
  • Publisher: Hamlyn (February 1, 2011)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0600622274
  • ISBN-13: 978-0600622277
  • Product Dimensions: 4.9 x 0.6 x 7.7 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 7.8 ounces
  • Average Customer Review: 3.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (13 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #943,212 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Dr. Gian Gonzaga Ph.D is the senior director of research and development at eHarmony Labs. He has taught, presented and published extensively on topics relating to relationships, love and health, and has received numerous awards for his work, including the prestigious National Science Foundation Minority Predoctoral Fellowship and Psi Chi National Undergraduate Research Competition. He is a member of several associations including the American Psychological Association, the American Psychological Society, the Society for Personality and Social Psychology, and more.

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Customer Reviews

3.1 out of 5 stars
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

8 of 8 people found the following review helpful By Irene Conlan on April 14, 2011
Format: Paperback
This book takes you from insecurity about meeting someone new through the dating process to doing what it takes to make a committed relationship work. After reading through to the last page, my initial thoughts about this book are:

I wish I had written it.
I wish I had read it before I got married years ago and before I became interested in a new relationship as a senior citizen. (Yep, even seniors are looking for love and companionship.)

This is a book of common sense. Unfortunately, sometimes in matters of the heart, common sense goes flying out the window and we think we can maneuver those treacherous waters of romance alone. Sometimes we can and sometimes we cannot. This book helps us know when and how to maneuver and when to back off or even run, not walk, to the nearest exit.

Gonzage states that this book is based on "years of research into what makes relationships work" and he and his team have included a lot of solid "dos and don'ts" and wonderful examples of couples who found each other "the second time around." It is interesting and informative - a "must read" for those who are about to venture into the uncharted area of a new relationship after a failed marriage or failed relationship and/or years of being alone or raising children alone.

Actually, this book should be "must reading" for anyone beginning any relationship regardless of their relationship history. It would be a great gift for wedding officiants to give their prospective bride and groom with the words, "There will be a quiz" before we schedule the wedding. As a minister who has officiated at many weddings, and has read a number of "marriage manuals." I find the information in Dating the Second Time Around to be the most realistic and the most helpful.
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6 of 6 people found the following review helpful By concerned reader on May 1, 2011
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Yeah, it's eHarmony's book so they get to plug themselves, big deal (you'd advertise, too). However, it's worth the money. If you're looking again after divorce, get it. Seriously. Even better if you're considering eHarmony, too. Sure, it's the basics but they're rounded-up comprehensively in one place and covered more candidly than elsewhere-- written for adults who have a brain and not a lot of time for vague B.S. (i.e., this ain't their first rodeo) but keeps still things quite positive. Meant for folk seeking to get together and stay together-- so Pick-Up Artist "game"sters into "negs" and "diplaying higher value" and females spinning-up the "rationalization hamster" chasing "Alphas" (both in fear of ending up alone for want of enough effort) pay attention, you may want to read this to help make you search healthier (and possibly make what you fear happening less likely). You'd spend $9.99 (at least) buying someone a drink that goes nowhere, so spend it on something more beneficial instead.
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13 of 17 people found the following review helpful By Lisa4301 on February 2, 2011
Format: Paperback
First of all, as a non-believer of online dating and formulas/quizzes/guided set ups for dating in general, I was not happy initially when I received this book as a gift from my sister (who by the way, met her fiance on Eharmony). Nevertheless, I decided to read it and all I can say is WOW! I was impressed with the formulas and thoughts they brought up to get me thinking about my dating style and more importantly, myself and what I have been doing with my love life for the past, oh, 15 years! I have read dating books before, but this one is very different. It got me thinking about what is most important, what I am really looking for, what is a deal breaker and what is tolerable. It also taught me a lot about myself and after a lot of self-reflection and an effort to be honest with myself, I learned a lot about what I've really been doing with my personal life and why many of my relationships didn't work out. Also, being a single mother, it was nice to find a section on introducing my kids to my date when the time is right - other books either didn't touch on it or didn't provide enough reasoning behind what to do/when to do it, but I found it to be helpful in this book.
All in all I really do recommend this book - especially for people like me who are looking for the right person but need a little bit more in-depth look, analysis if you will, on why we are single and why we can't seem to get it right. It's enlightening. I will definitely be recommending it to a few friends who are in the same boat- great people with bad memories of failed relationships.
Hope that helps all you non-believers (like me!!!) :)
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8 of 10 people found the following review helpful By Colleen on March 23, 2011
Format: Paperback
A friend enjoyed this book and mentioned it to me. I'm actually dating someone who is divorced, so it was interesting for me to read a book directing at folks who have been out of the game for a while.

I will recommend this to my friends who are getting out there again. Like nearly all of these types of books, this advice is not ground breaking. Rather, it reminds you of the basics, and provides some exercises that I think everyone - single or in a committed relationship - should do from time to time. It helps you keep perspective on what's important to you, and how you can be the best partner you can be for your mate.

I will admit...I find it a bit tiresome that every couple they highlight as a success met through eHarmony. It would be a bit more interesting if they mixed it up a bit, providing examples of couples who met online, as well as couples who met through friends, activities, at the coffee shop, what have you.
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