Bad Childhood---Good Life: How to Blossom and Thrive in Spite of an Unhappy Childhood (Hardcover)

~ (Author) "Unfortunately, a lot of people are made to suffer as children: beatings, rapes, torture, abandonment, neglect, parental divorce and subsequent remarriage with new or stepchildren..." (more)
Key Phrases: bad childhood, sour lemons

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

With her characteristically pointed advice and take-no-prisoners attitude, Dr. Laura's book Bad Childhood – Good Life tackles one of the most basic questions of therapy: How can a person effectively move past the injuries of a bad childhood? Her answer will be familiar to her fans—look at your current behavior and modify what you can change rather than simply venting your anger or allowing yourself to ever be victimized again.

Forget about simply accepting or forgiving your parents for their errors—Dr. Laura extols the virtues of conquering. Through excerpts from her radio show and letters from her listeners, she illustrates her points about guilt, anger and fear in personalized accounts from individuals. Short lists and question/answer sections make for an easy read that allows you to smoothly fast forward and backtrack to the topics you find most relevant at the moment—and numerous references to other chapters and her website provide all the additional information you could want. Faith is a subtle but definite component; some readers will find it the most helpful part of the book while it decidedly won't appeal to others.

Not everyone will agree with—or appreciate--her succinct manner that drives right to the root of issues. Like her show, the book presents absolutes rather than possible alternatives. For readers looking for a definitive method for moving past childhood issues, Dr. Laura might offer the solution. Jill Lightner

From Publishers Weekly

Tis the season, right? For childhood issues to flare up just in time for the trip home for the holidays. Instead of resolving to lose those pesky 10 pounds, 2006 may be the perfect time to stop letting a bad childhood ruin another year, says Schlessinger, author of seven New York Times bestsellers and host of an internationally syndicated radio talk show. Schlessinger uses radio listeners' call-ins, her own stories and a little help from Carly Simon to help adults stuck in the past break free from destructive patterns and move peaceably forward. "The truth is that there is always a battle between the history and the present," she writes. Schlessinger tailors her advice staples (take charge, get tough, be positive, live for something other than yourself) toward securing victory over childhood traumas by admonishing readers against thinking emotionally about emotional subjects, advocating black and white reasoning (one listener's mother is deemed "evil") and proposing an amoeba-brainless and unthinking-constitutes a workable decision making model. Readers already of the Schlessinger school will find much here to appreciate, though it's doubtful this will win her any new fans.
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Product Details

• Hardcover: 272 pages
• Publisher: HarperCollins; 1st edition (January 3, 2006)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 006057786X
• ISBN-13: 978-0060577865
• Product Dimensions: 8.4 x 5.4 x 1.1 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (88 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #77,506 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

64 of 64 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A Good Life IS Within Reach!, April 13, 2006

By	Crochet Lover "crochetlover" - See all my reviews

A friend who's known me since I was ten suggested Dr. Laura's Bad Childhood - Good Life to me while we were on the phone a while back. I cringed. Ick.

I was not a fan of Dr. Laura's at the time, and from what I recalled of the few times I listened to her in the past, really didn't want to hear what she had to say about how to deal with an abusive childhood. Would she really understand? Could she? I couldn't imagine.

Later, while grocery shopping, I picked the book up off a rack and read the passage on the back cover. I was surprised to read that Dr. Laura advocated those who've been through abuse should stop calling ourselves "victims" or "survivors," and instead move on to being "conquerors." She didn't simply dismiss with a snippy "get over it" like I'd assumed.

Aroo? Conqueror? That actually sounded pretty good to me. OK, I'll bite... I checked it out from my local library.

I have since bought myself a copy and read it twice. It was either that or buy the library's copy because I'd never return it.

Dr. Laura illustrates through numerous phone calls and letters from listeners, ordinary folks like you and me, how we CAN move beyond our pasts to a better life. She shows the reader the secret blessing in that as adults we can choose something better for ourselves, no matter what.

Mind you it cannot be done through self-will; I learned this the hard way (okay, I admit I STILL am) and Dr. Laura reinforces that lesson. We need to be willing to reach out to others who can validate and support us through the journey of leaving an ugly past behind.

At the same time, she minces no words when she says that there is no such thing as completely healing. A scar will always be there, reminders will always come up. The key is to accept them.

Dr. Laura suggests finding a relationship with God (and so do I). She also cuts to the chase by offering phrases that empower and encourage, such as not letting what others did to us yesterday define who we are today, and not seeking love from the Devil, aka family members who have gravely failed us.

Dr. Laura is a staunch advocate of examining if we are better off with or without toxic family members, and not just immediately cutting people off because they make us uncomfortable. She helps the reader examine where on the spectrum someone falls today - are they simply annoying, or are they evil?

If it's the former, how can we find peace in keeping that person in our lives if it's not necessary to cut them out? If it's the latter, do we really need to feel guilt over letting natural consequences occur because someone refuses to be responsible for abusing or abandoning us, especially when we need to consider protecting loved ones in our lives who can't protect themselves? In fact, is what we feel really guilt, or the natural grieving process in letting go of what could no longer be?

Finally, Dr. Laura offers us a glimpse into her own not-so-good childhood that helps to personalize the overall messages she offers. She does so in a way that is lovingly put and at the same time made me feel compassion for her difficulties, and hopeful... because if she could climb out of the pit of her past, well, why can't anyone?

Before I was finished reading this book, I was able to tackle some difficult dilemmas that I'd struggled with for years, and act on them. I know that I made good choices simply because they were right, and better yet I've set good examples for my children.

I am thankful that I was able to open my mind to what she had to say; I've since become a regular listener to Dr. Laura. While sometimes I wonder what color the sky is on her planet, other times I'm cheering "Right ON!" when she fearlessly lets people know we need to take a stand on certain moral values and protecting our children. Thanks to her I know now that a Good Life is indeed within my reach, and every day I am able to claim myself as a conqueror is a victorious one.

24 of 25 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars I'm off the fence now..., September 9, 2007

By	E. Glennon - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

This review is from: Bad Childhood---Good Life: How to Blossom and Thrive in Spite of an Unhappy Childhood (Paperback)

Before I purchased and read this book, I was on the fence, "Did I have a bad childhood?" Well the answer is no, I did not, at least not to the extent that others have had bad childhoods, but the lessons taught in this book in fact can help ALL of us to not take things so personally, and to enjoy what life has given us now, as adults. I love Dr. Laura, I don't alway agree with her, but this time she is just trying to help the adults in this country grow up a bit.

24 of 26 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Perspective of someone who is NEUTRAL on Dr. Laura, June 20, 2006

By	Bette (East Coast USA) - See all my reviews

I know Dr. Laura has her devotees, as well as her detractors. Just for the record, I'm neutral on her. I picked this book off of the library shelf based upon the title alone and decided to read it in spite of all of the bad press the author receives, and not knowing what to expect.

I was pleasantly surprised. There is no propaganda here, just helpful bits of information and advice not only from Dr. Laura, but from her listeners as well.

How much you personally gleen from this book depends on how far along you are in your healing. I'm pretty far along, but I still found several helpful pearls of wisdom. Some subchapters did not apply to me at all, so I simply skimmed them. Others who are just beginning on their healing journey will probably want to read the whole book, though, and might confuse some of the messages herein. For example, Dr. Laura's message in general is NOT "get over it." But she makes a point that, once you have identified your issues and dealt with them for a time, there is no need to dwell on them forever. Actually, her message is that you can transform the negatives into positives and have a good life in spite of even the most horrific childhoods.