Who's Pulling Your Strings?: How to Break the Cycle of Manipulation and Regain Control of Your Life (Hardcover)

by Harriet Braiker (Author)

Editorial Reviews

Review
"..she helps readers recognize manipulation and assesses and reduce their own vulnerability." -- Library Journal

Product Description

A self-empowering plan for anyone who wants to stop being manipulated by others

In Who's Pulling Your Strings?, Dr. Harriet B. Braiker,New York Times bestselling author of The Disease to Please, explains how depression, low self-esteem, chronic anger, and feelings of helplessness are often the result of being caught in relationships with manipulative people--including family members, friends, coworkers, and associates. More importantly, she arms readers with the knowledge and tools they need to understand and identify manipulative personalities and to free themselves from the bondage of relationships with them.

Working from sound psychological theory and research, yet writing in a warm, accessible style, Braiker exposes the most common methods manipulative people use to control others--and makes clear that it takes at least two people to enable such a relationship to function. With the help of valuable self-assessment quizzes, action plans, and how-to exercises she empowers readers to:

• Recognize the signs of a manipulative relationship
• Spot manipulators and their typical modus operandi
• Assess their own vulnerability to manipulation
• Identify the 7 main "Head Games" manipulators play

...and much more, including informative case studies and highly effective Resistance Tactics to help those who identify themselves as victim-participants end the damaging cycle of control and manipulation--and clear the way for success and happiness.

Orlando Sentinel, She devotes her book to explaining how manipulators operate and, more important, what their victims can do to end these destructive relationships. --Harry Wessel

Chicago Tribune, …offers practical suggestions for those who find themselves repeatedly yanked, right down to language they can use in a tight spot. --Joanne Trestrail

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Product Details

• Hardcover: 256 pages
• Publisher: McGraw-Hill; 1 edition (August 12, 2003)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0071402780
• ISBN-13: 978-0071402781
• Product Dimensions: 9.3 x 6.3 x 1.1 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1.3 pounds
• Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars See all reviews (4 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #497,896 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

14 of 14 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars waking up to manipulative relationships, February 29, 2004

By A Customer

Dr.Braiker made understanding "manipulation" easy. Kudos to a book well written. Searching for books to learn what manipulation IS is hard to come by. Sometimes in our fast paced world we are so caught up that the art of manipulation can cause denial even to "seemingly" intellegent people. My work environnment was so covertly manipulated by its owner that I preferred to look the other way, due to building a company, rather than force myself into realizing how detrimental my environnment was. Peoples live have been ruined. Whether your in a bad relationship on a personal or professional level Dr. Braiker will defintely help you understand, and ultimately help you gain Your-Self back.

12 of 12 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent Insight!, July 29, 2004

By	S. L. Hale "Shae" (Midwest) - See all my reviews

This book is a must read if you've been in any sort of manipulative relationship weather it be romantic, friendships, or family related. Not only are the hints helpful in recognizing WHEN you're being manipulated, but it provides the tools necessary to combat manipulative situations. Every aspect of this book applied in my life somewhere and in multiple areas such as work, home, love, family, and friends. A MUST read for everyone as we've all been prey to manipulators at one time or another.

On an alternate note, there are also scenarios in this book that might make you think of a time or times that you have manipulated others. It's helpful to have these pointed out and be conscious of your own manipulative tactics even if you weren't aware of them previously.

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Incredibly eye-opening and helpful in our ongoing drama., September 16, 2007

By	Myron E. Bratton "Mick" (Somewhere, NY) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

In going through his divorce, my fiance and I have been harassed, stalked, guilted and manipulated repeatedly by his soon to be ex. I read the book and we discussed many topics and took several quizzes the book has included. My fiance was surprised at how right on the book was on how he has been repeatedly harassed for years by his ex.
Recently, we thought she was focusing her attentions finally elsewhere, until we logged on amazon and since the email and passwords were the same from a long time ago, she had logged on and in our browsing history were recent views of books on saving the marriage on "your own" and others. Unbelievable!
These book talks about what a manipulators true 'motives' are (you basically are dealing with someone who wants you to do something or wants you to stop doing something). I especially felt we benefited from a step discussing setting terms, and defining why extraction from a relationship might be your best and healthiest goal.
Its okay though! She told him recently "I've got the goods on you" Little does she know, the POLICE and authorities in the fields on stalking have the "goods on her". Sigh. Read this book! If you have a manipulative ex, parent, spouse, child, it will help you learn to toughen up and learn to change how you respond to people like this. They don't change, but you can.