From Publishers Weekly
In this guide to working through some of the common problems that crop up in raising a family, Metcalf, an experienced family therapist, suggests that understanding the reasons for a behavior doesn't always change it. Focusing on solutions, she offers parents ways of changing their children's destructive behaviors by using the skills they have already learned, especially from the workplace. While children, of course, aren't expected to behave like corporate employees, Metcalf makes her points forcefully, putting forth extremely specific strategies and goals, illustrated with sample dialogues and case studies. Readers who aren't put off by the author's stilted prose and somewhat monotonously earnest tone will likely find useful observations and approaches here. Metcalf shows readers how to keep the child's problem from overshadowing the whole child and how to define it as something that can be solved. She offers techniques for improving communication with teenagers and helping younger children overcome specific anxieties. Strategies for handling more serious challenges, such as attention deficit disorder, depression and anger, are also provided, along with information on dealing with school conflicts from kindergarten on. Tips on talking to kids about grief and loss, sex and drugs are also provided; exercises and worksheets are included throughout the volume.
Copyright 1996 Reed Business Information, Inc.
From Library Journal
Metcalf's premise is that parents need to use their own abilities to deal with problems of children and teens. Much of that premise rests on avoiding comparisons with other kids and focusing on the positives, not the negatives. To help find the why in kids' behavior, she uses a genogram technique, in which parents formulate a family tree with names, characteristics, skills, and descriptions of each family member. A helpful chapter about school situations includes lots of sample forms (solution-focused individual educational plans, teacher observation sheets) and ideas on good conversations with adolescents in crisis. All in all, this approach encourages parents to quit looking for solutions handed to them and to begin relying instead on their own personal resources. Metcalf, a former teacher, is a family therapist in Arlington, Texas. Recommended for public libraries.?Linda Beck, Indian Valley P.L., Telford, Pa.
Copyright 1997 Reed Business Information, Inc.