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Abused Men: The Hidden Side of Domestic Violence
 
 
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Abused Men: The Hidden Side of Domestic Violence (Hardcover)

by Philip W. Cook (Author) "There is no question that domestic violence directed against women is a serious problem..." (more)
Key Phrases: deferred sentencing program, abused men, domestic relations cases, United States, Sedgwick County, Malcolm George (more...)
4.3 out of 5 stars See all reviews (21 customer reviews)

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Editorial Reviews

Review
“For a look at the often discounted issue of partner abuse against men, read Abused Men: The Hidden Side of Domestic Violence by Philip W. Cook.”–Charleston Gazette/Chicago Tribune/Newsday/The Record

“Cook's achievement is admirable. Not only does he cover his topic succintly and thoroughly, meticulously documenting each step he takes, but he also delves into a number of pertinent related issues lesser authors might have missed entirely....Cook has written a remarkable, invaluable book.”–Transitions

“Cook writes in an interesting and inviting manner, the engaging style of a journalist providing an in-depth discussion of a topic that he acknowledges in controversial, emotionally laden, and in conflict with many beleifs about abuse and violence in America.”–Journal of Marriage and the Family

“[This book] reads like 1,000 Dear Abby letters...fascinating...but it explains the many aspects of domestic violence. It has a wealth of material that could be helpful to professionals who deal with domestic violence.”–"Dear Abby" Abigail Van Buren

“I am grateful to Philip Cook for writing Abused Men. This is a brave book.... [The author] brings to bear in this book his knowledge as a journalist and his evident care and compassion for all victims of domestic violence.”–Erin Pizzey Founder of Chiswick Women's Refuge Author, Scream Quietly or the Neighbors Will Hear

“This just might be the volume to get the message across finally that domestic violence is a human problem, not just a gender problem.”–R.L. McNeely, Ph.D., J.D. Attorney Professor of Social Welfare, University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee

“Very thought-provoking and well researched. [This book] should aid in educating medical professionals regarding this potential diagnosis as well as help shape our legal approach.”–Kenneth H. Coleman, M.D., J.D. Attorney at Law

“Thought provoking research which will stimulate further inquiry into human behavior long neglected.”–Ronald R. Still, M.S. Chief of Police (Retired) Portland, Oregon

“Mr. Cook argues persuasively that we may be looking at only half the problem, and we're neglecting the needs of male victims. It also seems clear that much of Mr. Cook's work applies equally to abused people of either gender, and he offers practical suggestions for the abused. His solutions would impact all cases of domestic violence and are well worth our consideration.”–Rob Solomon Licensed Professional Counselor Author, Full-Esteem Ahead

“Perhaps with this book, Philip Cook can accomplish what academics have for the past 25 years failed to do--to cut through the political rhetoric and finally present the case of abused men as a real social problem. Cook goes beyond the issue of battered males as he sheds incredible insight into the systemic problem of family violence. Perhaps now, couples experiencing violence in their relationships can be helped. His case material sadly brings to life the statistics researchers generate.”–Reena Sommer, Ph.D. Assistant Professor, University of Manitoba Family Counselor

“I find Abused Men most appealing because of the rigorous research upon which the findings are based. There is nothing that is not fully substantiated by data...I appreciate the balance achieved in addressing a topic, usually ignored, in an era of accusations and hysteria that often detracts from the actual aggression and violence that affects domestic relations. This book is a real contribution that will help in the education of all professionals in the field of sociology and mental health.”– Stanley G. Sturges, M.D. Medical Director CareMark Behavioral Health Services

“Unique. The case materials presented are gripping, and need to be part of the historical and social record. It is a book likely to be helpful to many men, and if action is taken on the agenda outlined in the final chapter, to our country as a whole.”–Murray A. Straus, Ph.D Co-Director Family Research Laboratory University of New Hampshire

Review
"[This book] reads like 1,000 Dear Abby letters...fascinating...but it explains the many aspects of domestic violence. It has a wealth of material that could be helpful to professionals who deal with domestic violence." - "Dear Abby" Abigail Van Buren --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

  • Hardcover: 216 pages
  • Publisher: Praeger Trade; 1 edition (September 30, 1997)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0275958620
  • ISBN-13: 978-0275958626
  • Product Dimensions: 9 x 6.2 x 0.8 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.3 out of 5 stars See all reviews (21 customer reviews)
  • Amazon.com Sales Rank: #193,484 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

    Popular in these categories: (What's this?)

    #28 in  Books > Nonfiction > Social Sciences > Sociology > Men
    #61 in  Books > Health, Mind & Body > Mental Health > Abuse & Self Defense > Domestic Violence

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Customer Reviews

21 Reviews
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Average Customer Review
4.3 out of 5 stars (21 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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35 of 37 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Abused men feel pain too, December 16, 2002
By graeme (London, UK) - See all my reviews
Congratulations for writing a book on this subject. You may save some lives. I work for a voluntary organisation in the UK called ManKind that helps male victims of domestic violence, as until we set up this chairty last year there was nowhere for abused men to turn. Some of the other reviews here show a major problem we have: wherever we go to try for funding or even charity status we seem to meet people who say: no, abused men don't exist, or that if they do they ask for it, or they enjoy it (when I have received a phone call from a man in tears who has just been stabbed in the arm and thrown out of his (their) home with his (their) two children, I can't believe that people can make this claim), or they should be able to look after themselves. What matters is that being abused, verbally or physically, by someone who you love or who you are in a relationship with, is absolutely terrible, about the worst thing that will happen to anyone unfortunate to experience it. I know because it happened to me last year, out of the blue, but it trapped me and took me to the edge of a cliff. This abusive relationship (I'm 6ft andover 12stone, she's 5ft 4in and 8 stone) left me with more than 100 bruises and cuts, three bust ribs and mental scars that will take years to heal. NEVER ONCE DID I HOLD HER, THREATEN HER OR HIT HER BACK. I believe she is very unwell and was, as is often the case in abusive relationships, hitting someone else (in her mind) when she hit me. Incidentally, ManKind chairty has started to help female abusers as there is nowhere they can turn in the UK either - further evidence that this problem has just been ignored until now. Now if you still believe that men are making up this problem, does that mean the many calls I've had from women who regret and can't understand verbally abusing and physically beating their male partners are just made up too? Abusive violence in all its terrible forms degrades, harms, creates a cycle of violence, and kills - and WE SHOULD ALL WORK TOGETHER TO STOP IT. By helping fill a gap and make people aware that men are battered too (and it's usually the caring type of men who fall into being abused as they stay around hoping they can help) and need help and helping them, and that female abusers need help too, certainly the charity I work for is in no way meaning to take any resources or energy or attention from groups helping abused women or abusive men. I would ask those who feel this way to think about a man (that is; a son, a husband, a friend, a colleague, a daddy, a human being) who has lost sense of himself, is being controlled and used by another human being to project their bad feelings onto, and is feeling suicidal (I have heard of men who have committed suicide over the abuse they have been given, made worse by the fact that they were not aware that this does happen, thus increasing their sense of isolation and "wimpishness"), and put their energies to helping to bring harmony where there is harm, light where there is darkness, love where there is hate, and hope where there is despair.
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34 of 36 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Intimate Violence: The Case of Abused Men, April 25, 2003
By Eugen Lupri (Cochrane, Alberta, Canada) - See all my reviews
Philip Cook's Abused Men  is well conceived, well documented, and well written; it is an excellent source book for both perpetrators and victims of domestic violence as well as for  police officers, community leaders, health care providers, family therapists, crisis-line workers, and other helping professionals. Another positive aspect of this book is Cook's  ability to make research findings on male abuse and its consequences accessible and understandable for readers new to the field of domestic violence. The book can serve as an eye opener about the factions, disagreements, and controversy that are part of the issue of domestic violence.

Eugen Lupri, Ph.D.
Professor Emeritus of Sociology
The University of Calgary
Calgary, Alberta
Canada

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27 of 29 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Very Helpful and informative, December 23, 1999
By A Customer
If the woman in your life is out to get you, you must read this book. It is extremely helpful and the only book I know of exclusively on the subject of husband/boyfriend battering by women. The statistics in this book are surprising and the stories of the abused men in this book are its strongest point. This is really a breakthrough book.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews

5.0 out of 5 stars Male Victims Exist
I work in a domestic violence program. I got interested in this work not only because I was a victim of psychological abuse in a previous relationship, but mostly because my... Read more
Published 15 months ago by hispana de corazón

5.0 out of 5 stars Balanced Picture of Domestic Violence on Both Sides
Author Phil Cook does and excellent job of documenting and presenting a logical case that Abused Men (and fathers and their children) by women is very real, large as life, often... Read more
Published on September 17, 2005 by T. Miller

5.0 out of 5 stars A crisis too long ignored
Society has come a long way, baby, in recognizing WOMEN'S domestic violence but has completely overlooked the plight of abused HUSBANDS. Where are THEIR shelters? Read more
Published on May 6, 2005 by Fruit Loop

5.0 out of 5 stars An inspiring healing book
First I must address several grievous mistake in the review written by Detroit velvet. 1. This individual states that it is wrong to say more men than women are abused. Read more
Published on December 8, 2004 by cayzar

5.0 out of 5 stars Open your eyes and look at the entire picture of abuse.
Sorry to all the feminist apologists out there, but men *are* abused by their female lovers, and rarely do they defend themselves - because the odds are so incredibly stacked... Read more
Published on December 26, 2003 by Hepzibah P. Flurge

5.0 out of 5 stars Ah, those pesky statistics....
First, let me say that this book is perhaps one of the most important books you will ever read. Not just because of the implications to public policy, but because a male friend... Read more
Published on March 6, 2003 by Vincent Bost

1.0 out of 5 stars Hurtful and horrifically damaging
Anyone with any experience in domestic violence knows that the abuser in the situation will immediately claim their partner abused *them*. Read more
Published on November 3, 2002 by detroit_velvet

1.0 out of 5 stars Misinformation promotes abusers and no help real victims
The information that half of abuse is by women is a deliberate misreading of research that was done that did not distinguish between types, severity, and lethality of behaviors,... Read more
Published on October 22, 2002 by B. Shaw

5.0 out of 5 stars One of the Most Important Books Ever Written About Violence
Abused Men: The Hidden Side of Domestic Violence. Philip W. Cook.
Westport, Connecticut: Praeger Publications, 1997. Read more
Published on October 9, 2002 by arclaw

5.0 out of 5 stars Yep, I was abused...
... by my older sister when a child and adolescent and first gf in college.

Since then I have "merely" been verbally and psychologically abused by successive... Read more

Published on August 26, 2002

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