How To Want What You Have (Paperback)

~ Timothy Ray Miller (Author)

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

This is not a collection of encouraging essays on simplicity, nor is it perky advice on how to get by with less. Timothy Miller, a clinical psychologist, sets out to uncover in recent scientific studies the roots of the insatiable appetite of humans. After establishing our instinctual need for More, he pursues its destructive consequences and then he outlines a methodology for transcending the cycle. His infinitely pragmatic advice centers on his elaboration of Compassion, Attention, and Gratitude. Here is perennial wisdom transformed into practical science. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

From Publishers Weekly

Referring to the wisdom in the traditions of Buddhism, Christianity and humanistic philosophies, Miller here constructs a model by which individuals who seek "more" than what they have can find happiness by wanting what they already have. The process is difficult, he stresses, requiring a change of heart. A California cognitive psychotherapist, Miller establishes three pinciples-compassion, attention and gratitude-that must be employed lifelong for change to be lasting. Commingling case histories, anecdotes and engaging humor, he demonstrates the principles. This commonsense counselor offers a feasible method for living and enjoying a good life "in accordance with the old saying that happiness is a way of traveling rather than a destination." Realistic solace for the discontented.
Copyright 1994 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

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Product Details

• Paperback: 265 pages
• Publisher: Harper Perennial (January 1, 1996)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0380726823
• ISBN-13: 978-0380726820
• Product Dimensions: 7.9 x 5.2 x 0.9 inches
• Shipping Weight: 8.8 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (17 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #243,971 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

32 of 32 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Wisdom for the True Insiders, November 21, 2000

By	David Kleist - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

Tim Miller's book is the Real Thing: a synthesis of the best of a multitude of religious and philosophical traditions which is directly applicable to twenty-first century everyday life.

Its language is clear; its ideas are sound; and despite its initial burst of success, it has temporarily gone out of print. This is a catastrophic loss since Miller is so clear-eyed, pragmatic, objective, and honest. His directions for practicing a life of Compassion, Attention, and Gratitude are as profound as they are simple and understandable.

I reread a few pages of Miller each evening to keep me focused.

Miller is not into giving seminars or proselytizing. In a sense, this is unfortunate: his ideas could transform our modern moral landscape more powerfully than virtually any of the other "movements" of our era.

Walter Kaufmann is my hero for academic philosophizing; Tim Miller is my hero for bread-and-butter daily living.

Ye who have ears to hear and eyes to see: get with it, dude!

20 of 20 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Some great ideals and a well-referenced thesis., February 7, 2000

By	Levi Wallach (Vienna, VA USA) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

Another title for this book could be "How to be inhumanly good." Miller's main thesis is that it is human instinct to want more, no matter how much you have, how good your life is, etc. Because of this, he argues, it is impossible for us to get what we want, because we will always invent something that we don't have. So we should come to terms with this urge and get on with our lives. In addition to this, he proposes three major areas to concentrate whenever we get too bogged down in wanting more. These three areas are Compassion, Attention, and Gratitude. So, according to Miller, if we continually strive to be more compassionate, pay more attention to what is going on around us and to what others are saying, and be more thankful for what we have, the yearnings for more should eventually fade, though of course never disappear completely. It was certainly an interesting read, but I think it would be almost impossible to follow exactly Miller's suggestions, though of course helpful to strive towards his ideals. It would take extraordinary dedication to the ideas and practices layed out in this book. Miller introduces many interesting sociological, historical, and religious documents to support his thesis. And it is a thesis to some extent, being extremely well-referenced. Miller approaches his readers as rational, intelligent individuals, rather that the desperate masses seeking THE answer. He even lists his email address and a mailing list dedicated to discussing the theories in the book. I subscribed to the mailing list for a couple of weeks, but found it a bit too heavy in long depressing narratives or short messages from obviously depressed individuals.

10 of 10 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A Must Read For All Depresives, March 31, 2000

By	Peter Michuda (Aurora, Illinois) - See all my reviews

This review is from: How to Want what You Have (Audio Cassette)

I am a sufferer of depression. I've had three bouts with it, the last one landing me in a psych ward, a very good one I might add. The therapist I saw after that recommended I read this book and it is one of the most influential books I have read in my life. I highly recommend anyone who is prone to depression to read this stellar work. It gives a whole new perspective on how one should look at every aspect of everyday life, especially the mundane. It has impacted my life profoundly. If anyone suffers from depression, I know all too well what it's like. I can't stress strongly enough...GET THIS BOOK!