Most Helpful Customer Reviews
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21 of 21 people found the following review helpful:
3.0 out of 5 stars
Addresses Most Every Father Loss Scenario, October 23, 2000
This book has a very wide scope and attempts to address the many possibilities for how and when a daughter may have lost her father. There is a chapter on incest, one on paternal suicide, one on divorce/abandonment, etc. But the book's focus, is definitely on daughters whose father passed away when she was a child--and it makes sense that this is the focus, because that was the author's (Elyce Wakerman) situation. I, however, was most interested in the stories on divorce/abandonment, but those were few. The chapter on divorce is very good, and the stories included about divorce were helpful because as a child of divorce myself, I was able to resonate with the feelings of other women and to come to grips with the loss that I experienced. But this book was, for me, very unsatisfying. I felt like the times they mentioned the effects of divorce on a daughter were great--but they were few. So if you are a daughter of divorce, I would recommend reading a book devoted entirely to that topic, instead of this one. It is so wide in the range of women it addresses that I would recommend women dealing with father loss to find a book that deals more specifically with their individual situation. That said, this book did provide me with some good insights, and excited the desire to delve more fully into issues of father loss.
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16 of 16 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
One of the most important books in my life, July 25, 1997
By A Customer
The first time I finished this book was at 4:00 in the morning. I promptly threw it across the room and cried until dawn. The second time I read "Father Loss," I dog eared the upper right hand corner of the pages I liked. The third time I read it, I dog eared the bottom right hand corners of the pages that interested me. After that, I took to highlighting the important paragraphs. My copy of "Father Loss" is all but mangled, but I will not give it up. Since 1985, I've purchased countless copies for women friends with similar backgrounds. You should read the thank you notes I've received...they're full of praise for Wakerman's masterpiece. This book helped me to understand why I behave the way I do. It also gave me comfort in the knowledge that I was not alone in my suffering and that my anguish was real and worthy of attention. Although nothing will replace the black hole in my heart left by my father's death, "Father Loss" was the most important tool in my recovery and my path to a healthier relationship with men. A must-have for any woman who has lost her father to death, divorce or abandonment. It will help. Trust me on this one
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9 of 9 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars
Great for fathers, mothers and daughters to read, December 27, 1998
By A Customer
As I was reading the book, not all of what Wakerman discussed resonated with me, but when it did, boy, did it strike a sensitive chord! This book needs to be read by mothers who are in denial, heartless fathers and fathers who may not be around very much longer, and by all daughters, even if their relationship with their fathers were great. Chances are, we've all experienced abandonment, even if ever so slight. What most women don't understand, just as I hadn't before I read the book, is that even the slightest feeling of abandonment snowballs and grows into something bigger then we all would like. By then, however, it's almost too insurmountable to deal with. It's worth dealing with, though. Learn from me: don't hold anything in. I did for at least 16 years, and it did more harm then good. If anyone relates to what I'm saying, buy this book!!
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