Never Eat Alone: And Other Secrets to Success, One Relationship at a Time (Hardcover)

~ (Author), (Author) "How on earth did I get in here? I kept asking myself in those early days as an overwhelmed first-year student at Harvard Business School..." (more)
Key Phrases: connected age, networking jerk, social arbitrage, Never Eat Alone, New York, What's Your Mission (more...)

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

The youngest partner in Deloitte Consulting's history and founder of the consulting company Ferrazzi Greenlight, the author quickly aims in this useful volume to distinguish his networking techniques from generic handshakes and business cards tossed like confetti. At conferences, Ferrazzi practices what he calls the "deep bump" - a "fast and meaningful" slice of intimacy that reveals his uniqueness to interlocutors and quickly forges the kind of emotional connection through which trust, and lots of business, can soon follow. That bump distinguishes this book from so many others that stress networking; writing with Fortune Small Business editor Raz, Ferrazzi creates a real relationship with readers. Ferrazzi may overstate his case somewhat when he says, "People who instinctively establish a strong network of relationships have always created great businesses," but his clear and well-articulated steps for getting access, getting close and staying close make for a substantial leg up. Each of 31 short chapters highlights a specific technique or concept, from "Warming the Cold Call" and "Managing the Gatekeeper" to following up, making small talk, "pinging" (or sending "quick, casual" greetings) and defining oneself to the point where one's missives become "the e-mail you always read because of who it's from." In addition to variations on the theme of hard work, Ferrazzi offers counterintuitive perspectives that ring true: "vulnerability... is one of the most underappreciated assets in business today"; "too many people confuse secrecy with importance." No one will confuse this book with its competitors.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

From Booklist

Ferrazzi grew up in rural Pennsylvania, the son of a steelworker and a cleaning lady, yet his ability to connect with others led to a scholarship at Yale, a Harvard MBA, and a prestigious partnership at Deloitte Consulting. His skills at creating and maintaining a network of contacts are nothing short of those of a serious presidential contender. All business hopefuls seek to enter a sphere of players more powerful than themselves, and Ferrazzi says that sometimes all it takes is asking. The book is dense with suggestions. Seek out mentors to guide you and introduce you to the people you need to know and then become a mentor yourself. Use your initial conversation to show the other person what you have to offer them, and never keep score. Make others feel important by remembering their names and birthdays. And don't be afraid to open up and show vulnerability--it's a great icebreaker. Ferrazzi presents a whirlwind of ideas to widen your circle of contacts that goes way beyond the usual stale concepts of "networking." David Siegfried
Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved

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Product Details

• Hardcover: 309 pages
• Publisher: Broadway Business; 1 edition (February 22, 2005)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0385512058
• ISBN-13: 978-0385512053
• Product Dimensions: 9.3 x 6.4 x 1 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1.2 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (245 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #905 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

503 of 542 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Caveat Networker, March 12, 2005

By	Christine Kenney (MIT) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

It seems like much of the efficacy of Ferrazzi's tactics lies in blurring the distinction between the personal and the professional connections. Not even church-going remains sacred.

At what point does a close-knit network become more invaluable than acquaintanceships struck during in-flight snackbreaks? Are 500 people willing to answer your calls (after the umpteenth time you've attempted to ambush them on the phone during their off hours) really an asset? Readers should keep in mind that one will not be able to fool all of the people all of the time with false pretenses of friendship. Ferrazzi's work would be more effective if he differentiated between intensities of friendship and the tactics most appropriate for each.

Further difficulties include:
-Networking Plan of Action (unfortunately acronymed NAP) includes scarcely a page of information about how to construct one.
-The arguments are often internally inconsistent: receiving an invitation to a 15 min coffee break is an affront, while sending one tops the personal arsenal list. Katharine Graham is eulogized as a champion of both "somebodies" and "nobodies." Yet Ferrazzi's lists of "people he'd like to meet" and his incessant extolling of the virtues of name-dropping seems to indicate "nobodies" are nobodies in his book. Finally, the distinction between a "networking jerk" and commendable behavior is, at best, subtle.
-For an individual so concerned with connectedness, it is curious that a bibliography or appendix of suggested reading is entirely absent.

May I suggest:
*How to Win Friends and Influence People: soft skills development
*Big Fish (a novel of "mythic proportions" by Daniel Wallace): a more sympathetic view on spin, for contemplating your own self-marketing plan or why Ferrazzi really left Deloitte.
*The Tipping Point: Chapter 2 is a more rigorous exploration of the roles the uber-connected play in social networks.

86 of 90 people found the following review helpful:

1.0 out of 5 stars Hardly "revolutionary", December 29, 2005

By	M. DiVirgilio "integrity_books" (Los Angeles) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Never Eat Alone: And Other Secrets to Success, One Relationship at a Time (Audio CD)

The book isn't that bad, but it isnt worth buying with so many other masters out there writing about how to get it done. Here's what's wrong....

First, it's billed as "revolutionary" concepts which I found to hardly be true. Almost evey idea was something that I've read in a Covey, Mackay, Peters, etc book. Recycled.

Further, he's so proud of his accomplishments it becomes exhausting to keep up with all the great things KF did in his life.

Finally, he writes often about how he was from poor, underprivileged family and he had nothing but his "revolutionary" concepts to break him into The Club. I believe it at first, until he started (and then repeated) to tell the reader about how he went to a private elementary and HS, then to Yale and Harvard BS. He was IN the club from first grade - hardly a life course that demonstrated how unique and terrific his practices were.

157 of 182 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Not Your Typical Networking Book, March 5, 2005

By	D. Buxman "A Seeker of Truth" (Pueblo, CO United States) - See all my reviews (TOP 500 REVIEWER)    (REAL NAME)

I'm a naturally shy person and I've always hated the concept of "networking." Everyone I know that practices it in the commonly accepted sense is a complete jerk. This book, however, addresses the true power behind networking; building actual relationships. I would probably give the book 4.5 stars, since too much of it is devoted to name dropping, but this small flaw does not detract from the value of the book. Mr. Ferrazzi takes the approach of building meaningful relationships with others, even when time is short. He doesn't advocate carpet bombing a room with your business cards or hanging out with people you despise as a means of getting ahead. I appreciate the fact that the author came from humble beginnings and was able to reach such heights in the world of business. There are several practical approaches that are discussed in this book that can be of help to both extroverts and the relatively introverted.