The Situation Is Hopeless But Not Serious (The Pursuit of Unhappiness) (Paperback)

~ Paul Watzlawick (Author) "THIS pearl of wisdom derives from Polonius, the Lord Chamberlain in Hamlet..." (more)
Key Phrases: relationship level, Latin Lover, Madame Irma, United States (more...)

Editorial Reviews

Product Description

Calling upon metaphors, vignettes, jokes, innuendos, and certain other "right-hemispheric" language games, Paul Watzlawick shows how we can (and do) make everyday life miserable.
Do you see the past through a rosy filter that makes it seem like Paradise Lost? Are you convinced that traffic lights always turn red for you? Do you have to win (so as not to lose)? After extricating yourself from a bad relationship, do you find another partner just like the previous one? If so, congratulations! You have the makings of an unhappiness expert. With the techniques in this book, you can raise yourself to the genius level. A word of warning, however. Along the way you may begin to ask yourself, "How did I manage to turn myself into my own worst enemy?" Fortunately, this tongue-in-cheek (but serious) volume takes a look at that question too.

Special attention is given to such topics as "Four Games with the Past," "Self-fulfilling Prophecies," and "Why Would Anybody Love Me?" Those who believe that the search for happiness will eventually lead to happiness will find much to ponder in the section "Beware of Arriving."

All readers will be both amused and startled to find themselves in these pages, but there is a special delight and enlightenment for therapists and counselors. Although the author does not officially admit it, the book is one complex "symptom prescription," a therapeutic double bind as described and practiced by him and his colleagues. .

About the Author

Paul Watzlawick is an associate at the Mental Research Institute, Palo Alto, and clinical professor in the department of psychiatry and behavioral sciences, Stanford University Medical Center.

Product Details

• Paperback: 128 pages
• Publisher: W.W. Norton & Co. (July 17, 1993)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0393310213
• ISBN-13: 978-0393310214
• Product Dimensions: 8.1 x 5.4 x 0.4 inches
• Shipping Weight: 5.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (11 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #201,115 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

26 of 26 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars LAUGHING YOURSELF OUT OF UNHAPPINESS, November 1, 2002

By	Luciano Lupini (Caracas Venezuela) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

A review by the marqueeofburano: A wonderful, witty, exposé of our endeavors to live a more miserable life by Watzlawick, a professor of psychiatry and behavioral science at Stanford University. The treatment of the subject will surely make you laugh at yourself and thus, perhaps, contribute to make you a better person.
W. deals with the fundamental, painful, necessity of the human being to be unhappy (in order to be quiet). And in fact, he contends that the best chapters of universal literature dwell with disaster, tragedy, guilt, madness, etc.
Dante's Inferno-W. writes- is very superior to his Paradise; same case as Milton's Paradise Lost compared with his Paradise Regained; Faust I's greatness is proportionally inverse to the tediousness of Faust II. So the author embarks hilariously in a methodic introduction to the best and more verifiable mechanisms to achieve unhappiness. Samples:
Always be truthful to yourself. A principle, from Polonius in Hamlet,of the outmost necessity for us ( its application is what gets the guy killed by Hamlet like a rat). So then, we must resist any temptation to yield to any other criteria or opinion, apart from ours. Never compromise or accept someone else's advice. The author then addresses the issue of the old saying: "time cures all wounds"..... According to W. four sound mechanisms exist if you want to avoid time's healing effects and transform the past into a present source of suffering. In the exaltation of the past we find those that only remember the good things about their youth and not the years of insecurity and anxiety. In so doing, they have a consistent reserve of sadness about their miserable present...... Also, this fidelity to the past, impairs our ability to enjoy the present and fully dedicate our efforts to the endeavors of the moment. Another mechanism is to consistently dwell with the guilt complex that past errors create, finding excuses or scapegoats (our parents, God, chromosomes, teachers etc.) while doing nothing to avoid committing the same mistakes again.
The author drives his point with practical examples. For instance the story of the hammer. A man wants to hang a painting. He has the nail, but not the hammer. Therefore it occurs to him to go over to the neighbor and ask him to lend him his hammer. But at this point, doubt sets in. What if he doesn't want to lend me the hammer? Yesterday he barely spoke to me. Maybe he was in a hurry. Or, perhaps, he holds something against me. But why? I didn't do anything to him. If he would ask me to lend him something, I would, at once. How can he refuse to lend me his hammer? People like him make other people's life miserable. Worst, he thinks that I need him because he has a hammer. This is got to stop ! And suddenly the guy runs to the neighbor's door, rings, and before letting him say anything, he screams: "You can keep your hammer, you b......"
Watzlawick not only discussess techniques to create false problems, but also the ones that make it actually possible to avoid solving problems and conver them into eternal torments. Here we get the example of the man that claps his hands every ten seconds. Asked why he does that, he answers: "to drive away the elephants..." -"But why, there are no elephants here"- The guy says: "Precisely".
This is a very funny book. It deals, with a fresh and delightful approach, with many of our karmas and mind bothering mosquitoes.......

13 of 13 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Foiled Again!, December 2, 1999

By	rareoopdvds (San Diego, CA United States) - See all my reviews (TOP 1000 REVIEWER)    (VINE VOICE)

Wonderful prose that's tongue-in-cheek throughout, Dr. Paul Watzlawicks book is a sure side splitter. Citing from real life events that exhibits silliness in our everyday lives, the author demonstrates and prepares a step by step process in which to fail over and over again and to be unhappy. This is for those that are in pursuit of being unhappy. Like the miserable and worried and the paranoid and the "I'll say 'no' because I can." After reading this book, I can happily say that I am unhappy.

13 of 15 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars How to be happy and laugh about yourself, December 21, 1999

By A Customer

I just got the german version "Anleitung zum Ungluecklichsein" for Christmas and can only recommend this title to everyone. The more skilled you are in being unhappy, the more this book is for your (despite the title!). Watzlawick shows with a lot of humor, how we make our own lives miserable and how funny and silly that really is if you look at it. Laughter and wisdom in one book.