Blending Families (Paperback)

by Elaine Fantle Shimberg (Author) "Your wedding day! The words conjure up visions of a bride in traditional white gown and veil, a nervous groom bolstered by his best man,..." (more)
Key Phrases: wedding bells toll, other biological parent, blending families, New York, Dividing the Children, Fourth of July (more...)

Editorial Reviews

Product Description
Today more Americans are part of a second-marriage family than a first. Inevitably, these newly blended "stepfamilies" will be confronted by their own special problems and needs. This insightful problem-solving guide offers solid solutions--and includes real-life stories from families who've been through the adjustment process. Written by an award-winning author who specializes in health and family care, the book covers a wide range of issues--emotional, financial, disciplinary, and interpersonal. Naturally, there is no "one-size-fits-all" solution for second-marriage families. Each is unique, with its own composition, personalities, and problems. But with patience and understanding, this new family can work, live, and eventually love--together. Includes special sections on:
* Family communication
* Former spouses
* Grandparents and step-grandparents
* Juggling households
* Commuting children
* Discipline
* School issues
* Family customs and rituals
* Religious differences
* Reducing stress
* Adult time
* Money issues
* Holiday planning
* Vacations
* Curfews and other rules

Product Details

• Paperback: 240 pages
• Publisher: Berkley Trade (April 1, 1999)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0425166775
• ISBN-13: 978-0425166772
• Product Dimensions: 9 x 5.9 x 0.6 inches
• Shipping Weight: 9.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 3.4 out of 5 stars See all reviews (5 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #51,999 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

44 of 46 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars A book you need..., June 9, 2002

By	Karon Goodman (Oxford, AL United States) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

This book calls itself an "easy-to-read, problem-solving guide," and that's pretty accurate. Written by a stepgrandmother with a refreshing and mature approach, this book focuses on solutions, not excuses. The advice is straightforward and free of hard to understand theory. There are quotes from stepparents throughout the text that illustrate the subjects well.

Early in the book, the author discusses communication in a stepfamily. She gives valuable advice for all relationships, active listening skills, and details on holding a family meeting. She also focuses on the marriage partnership. "Your spouse comes first," she says, and then offers ways to protect and nurture the marriage.

You'll enjoy the "Myths and Misses" chapter where the author discusses common misconceptions stepparents have. There is also help with handing the blended money as well as building and blending family traditions. The chapter on discipline is excellent, with thorough and specific guidelines and a reminder on how to interpret and understand a child's behavior. There's help on getting along with a former spouse and a full chapter devoted to stepgrandparenting.

The most helpful portion of the book may be the discussion on stress -- how to recognize, manage and reduce it. The "twelve ways to trip with steps" make it easy to understand, and then prevent, the little things that can add up to the big fallout. The author concludes with "Twelve Secrets for Successful Stepparenting," and while they seem simple, they are the valuable basics for building a happy new family.

16 of 20 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Answers to questions that stepparents have., June 19, 1999

By A Customer

This is a great resource for anyone starting a stepfamily. It considers many issues that may not be thought of until it is too late. This book covers issues such as communcation, discipline, religion, and many other topics. It will help new stepparents effectively deal with their new role as parent. A must read if you are in this new role.

5 of 5 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Very useful information, September 30, 2005

By	Dawn "http://www.steptalk.org" (St. Louis, MO) - See all my reviews

This book has very useful information. If you are a new step parent I would definately recommend reading this book. It covers many of the important issues that someone new to step parenting might not even think of.
The chapter on communication is especially important. As a matter of fact, it can be applied to all families, not just step families. This chapter explains the importace of such things as "family meetings". The concept of the family meeting helps everybody express their thoughts and ideas in a setting where open conversation is encouraged.
Also, discussed in this book is titles for new family members. This is always a touchy subject but the book does offer a few solutions to the problem.
There is also great emphasis put on the fact that the husband and wife should focus on their relationship in order to establish a strong foundation. They should make sure that they have some one on one time as well. Also, they must present a united front with rules and disipline.
Overall the book "Blending Families" is a good reference book to have. While it won't fix every problem that could be encountered, it does have some very good ideas to help step parents with some of the bigger issues.

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