Coping with Difficult People: The Proven-Effective Battle Plan That Has Helped Millions Deal with the Troublemakers in Their Lives at Home and at Work (Mass Market Paperback)

by Robert M. Bramson (Author) "This is a book about impossible people and how to cope with them..." (more)
Key Phrases: extensional questions, coping steps, coping plan, Sherman Tanks, Know-It-All Experts, Joe Matthews (more...)

Editorial Reviews

Product Description
Based on many years of research and observation, Dr. Robert Bramson identifies the seven personality types that victimize the people around them and offers six basic steps to coping with each one. Proves that difficult people may be unavoidable but not unmanageable. Reissue.

From the Publisher
Bosses, friends, family members, they've made your life hell -- until now! Based on fourteen years of research and observation, Dr. Robert Bramson's proven-effective techniques are guaranteed to help you right the balance and take charge of your life. Learn how to:

Stand up to anyone -- without fighting.

Blunt a sniper's attack.

Get a clam to talk.

Cut off a Sherman tank at the pass.

Manage bulldozers.

Get stallers off the dime.

Move a complainer into a problem-solving mode.

Learn the six basic steps that allow you to cope with just about anyone. Reclaim the power the rightfully belongs to you in any relationship!

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Product Details

• Mass Market Paperback: 240 pages
• Publisher: Dell (September 1, 1988)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0440202019
• ISBN-13: 978-0440202011
• Product Dimensions: 6.7 x 4.1 x 0.8 inches
• Shipping Weight: 4.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars See all reviews (21 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #43,767 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

102 of 104 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars you need this book wherever you are; Even alone on an island, August 6, 2000

By	Mayer Goldberg (Beer Sheva, Negev Israel) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

Coping with Difficult People is an amazingly useful book. Difficult people are all around you, even when you're alone: Most people don't realise just how difficult and unconstructive they can be! This book gives helps you identify difficult behaviour, and how to get around it.

WHAT THIS BOOK GIVES YOU

Difficult behaviour is not all that difficult to identify. That is, unless you're in the middle of a confrontation and you're either too annoyed or intimidated or distracted to realise what's taking place. This book won't turn you into a psychologist, but it will teach you how to identify difficult, destructive, problematic behaviour in people, and how to cope with it.

This book is about coping. You can't always convince someone, and when someone's determinsed to make life difficult for you you can't always win. But you can try to push ahead, keep your cool, remain focused and constructive and pleasant and not be trampled on. If you're experiencing a difficult time because of co-workers or friends or family members, having read this book, your life will not become all of a sudden easier and simpler and nicer. Difficult people will continue to make your life difficult. But if you follow the suggestions in the book you should be able to neutralise most of the difficult behaviour to the point where you can get things done.

WHY DOES IT WORKS WITH OTHERS

This book will help you because it's recipe oriented, and if you become adept at it, you will be able to use its suggestions under pressure -- the elements of surprise or helplessness in the difficult behaviour will be missed on you. Key phrases, key words, body language are used to identify a type of difficult behaviour/person. Then a basic approach is tailored around the type of difficult person you're dealing with, though you will need to adapt the material in the book to your particular environment, situation and style. The better you anticipate an encounter with a difficult person and plan for it, the less of a surprise will that person enjoy, the less a sense of inevitability and helplessness will he be able to instill in you. In that sense, this book is the equivalent to a book on Chess openings. It's very effective.

WHY DOES IT WORKS WITH YOURSELF

Almost everybody is a difficult person sometimes. This book will help you identify patterns of difficult behaviour in yourself, and will give you some rudimentry insight into why you're behaving that way. Becoming conscious of when you exhibit difficult, uncooperative, destructive behaviour -- with what people, in what situations, etc, is a first step to curbing these tendencies within yourself.

107 of 111 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars the real difficult person is inside you, March 19, 2003

By	Haseeb (Tempe, AZ United States) - See all my reviews

Most people have difficulty in dealing with certain personality types. An inability to deal effectively with others can cause very serious problems in morale, job performance and self esteem. It has been said that most problems related to losing one's job has more to do with human relations than with job performance per se. As a person who has been fired many times, I can attest to that statement. I've seen incompetent people keep their jobs, but I've seen several people (myself included) lose their jobs over inter-personal conflicts which seem silly in comparison. The more one is able to resolve and or avoid conflicts, the more successful they will be in the long run.

This book divides difficult people into seven different types namely "hostile-aggressives", "complainers", "silent and unreasponsives", "super-agreeables", "negativists", "know-it-all experts" and "indecisives". Each type of behavior is explained and real-world examples of each in action are given. The forte of the book is how it explains how to cope effectively with each type. In my dealings with others, I've found that the coping advice given is right on target. Chances are, any type of difficult person will fit into one of the aforementioned categories. If not, they will be a variation or a combination of two or more of them. The coping methods given in the book are not always easy to implement because they require a lot of practice and may require a great deal of courage. This isn't a book to just read once, the methods must be studied and practiced if you wish to benefit from it.

One of the most interesting things I've discovered when reading this book is that I have fit into some of the categories of difficult people at times. The more effectively I can learn about and fight my own difficult behavior, the easier it will be for me to deal with others who possess the same traits. Regardless of how much one knows about dealing with difficult people, it can still be a battle to implement the methods given in this book. Therefore, coping with difficult people is not about using some simple trick, it's all about confronting the difficult person within each of us.

48 of 49 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent Resource, February 13, 2001

By	Ms Diva "cycworker" (Nanaimo, B.C. Canada) - See all my reviews

Usually I don't like books of this sort because I find them simplistic. Admittedly this book is written for a general audience, but the author still makes an effort (and succeeds, in my opinion) in distinguishing between people who fit in to one of his types and people who can be difficult at times, but don't quite fit in a specific category. I never had the feeling of "oh, that could be anyone." And the techniques he gave to deal with difficult people were concise and easy to use. He really focuses on the fact that we can't change others, we can only change how we chose to respond, which is vital. A very positive, encouraging, readable book. I've already noticed a difference in my relationships after only a few weeks.