Cutting Loose: An Adult's Guide to Coming to Terms with Your Parents (Paperback)

by Howard Halpern (Author) "We're adults..." (more)
Key Phrases: guilt provocation, family ego mass, martyred mother, New York, Don Juan, Murray Bowen (more...)

Editorial Reviews

Product Description
With more than 35 years of experience in psychotherapy, Dr. Halpern enables the adult child to understand his or her parent and foster a positive, healthy adult relationship.

Product Details

• Paperback: 256 pages
• Publisher: Fireside (January 1, 2005)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0671696041
• ISBN-13: 978-0671696047
• Product Dimensions: 8.7 x 6.2 x 0.7 inches
• Shipping Weight: 12.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars See all reviews (9 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #64,466 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

23 of 24 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Changed my Life, September 7, 2002

By A Customer

I have NEVER been a person who believed that a self-help book could change your life. But this one changed mine! I read this book years ago (I am buying it now for a friend). I was in my 30's and I was still intimidated by my mother's manipulation. This book made me slap my forehead and say to myself "why on earth have I put up with this for so long???!! If ever a book liberated me, this book did. It showed me that it takes two to tango. If I didn't like the way my mother acted, there wasn't much I could do to change her behavior. However, I COULD change the way I responded - I could refuse to "dance the dance." For any adult who feels intimated or bullied by a parent, this is the book to read. Highly recommended!

13 of 14 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Learning to understand, February 24, 2001

By	"sheshe116" (Rhode Island USA) - See all my reviews

This book has hits the nail on the head when explaining why a controling,manipulative,self destructive parent behaves in the manner that they do. It also attempts to explian why and how the child participates in this song and dance. It also gives good advice on how to break the cycle and move forward to a more productive parent/child relationship or the reasons when and why you should end the relationship. All this is clearly written and easy to follow. What I liked most was the compassion and point blank honesty that is directed at the parents part and the childs part. I AGREE WITH THE AUTHOR THAT THE FAMILY RELATIONSHIP SHOULD BE PRESERVED YET NOT TO ALL COSTS.

21 of 25 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Say Good-bye to Momma and so long to daddy!, October 6, 1999

By A Customer

If we know what's holding us, then there is a good chance we can get loose.

Parents for some reason want to hold on and strangle the future of their children. Maybe because they didn't always want us around; maybe for some parents never wanting us from the beginning.

Cruel Statement you say, well I don't think so.

The passages in his book seem like he was right there with me. These statements made by Halpern are not just once in awhile in his book, but all too often.

It puts the problem where it belongs and points us in the right direction.

This knowledge is a way of cutting loose of their strong hold, once and for all.

After exposure to these writings it is very difficult to turn back, very difficult to make excuses anymore. I'd say almost impossible. You end up knowing why these things happened and where to start.

Good luck.

One personal comment: The talk of this book has been too little. Not enough people read it.

We heard it said that if I knew this years before, my life would be so much better.

If you read this to the last chapter then years no longer need to be wasted.

take care - steve write to [e-mail]