Healing After the Suicide of a Loved One (Paperback)

by Ann Smolin (Author), John Guinan (Author) "Three weeks after his eighteen-year-old son Robbie hung himself, Bill G.'s life began to resume many of its day-to-day routines..." (more)
Key Phrases: many suicide survivors, survivor support group

Editorial Reviews

Review
George Howe Colt

author of The Enigma of Suicide

With extraordinary understanding and compassion, the authors have written a guide that will be of great help to those who must navigate the painful and often overwhelming aftermath of losing a loved one to suicide.

Christopher Lukas

coauthor of Silent Grief: Living in the Wake of Suicide

Smolin and Guinan are pioneers in the use of support groups to help those left behind after a suicide. This book shows why they have been able to be comforting and to help survivors heal. It has humanity and gentle wisdom.

Product Description

Too often people suffering the aftermath of a suicide suffer alone. As the survivor of a person who has ended his or her own life, you are left a painful legacy -- and not one that you chose. Healing After the Suicide of a Loved One will help you take the first steps toward healing. While each individual becomes a suicide survivor in his or her own way, there are predictable phases of pain that most survivors experience sooner or later, from the grief and depression of mourning to guilt, rage, and despair over what you have lost.

You may be torturing yourself with repetitive questions such as "What if...?" "Why didn't we...?" and "Why, why, why?" Healing After the Suicide of a Loved One will steer you away from this all-too-common tendency to blame yourself and will put you on the path to healing and recovery. Remember, your wounds can heal and you can recover. Filled with case studies, excellent information, valuable advice, and a completely up-to-date reading list and directory of suicide support groups nationwide, this valuable book will give you the strength and hope to go on living.

Product Details

• Paperback: 224 pages
• Publisher: Fireside Books/Simon & Schuster; 1st edition (June 22, 1993)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0671796607
• ISBN-13: 978-0671796600
• Product Dimensions: 8.4 x 5.5 x 0.7 inches
• Shipping Weight: 8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.1 out of 5 stars See all reviews (18 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #213,288 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

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  #35 in	Books > Health, Mind & Body > Psychology & Counseling > Suicide
  #84 in	Books > Health, Mind & Body > Death & Grief > Suicide

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

74 of 75 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Powerful Insight of a Terrible Tragedy, June 10, 2000

By	Deborah A. Woehr (San Jose, CA USA) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

I bought this book nearly four years after my brother took his own life. I wish I'd bought this sooner. The authors did a great job conveying how many of us feel after such a tragedy. This book covers every emotional aspect of suicide survivors and includes a listing of Suicide Prevention and Crisis Centers by state and city.Chapter 3, which covers guilt, was especially helpful because it covers all the what-ifs and should-haves. It explains how that emotion can destroy your health and family, and that there was really nothing you could've done to prevent this from happening. Suicide does not stem from one particular argument or pitfall in a person's life; it is a culmination of things.Chapter 5 is about ambivalence, which covers anger as well as putting the deceased on a pedestal. Another aspect was relief. Those cases I found heartbreaking because of the problems the person put his family through before they died.Chapter 6 talks about the normal depression after the loss versus clinical depression, the latter which many suicides suffer before they die.Chapters 8 through 11 cover the different relationships between the suicide victim and the survivors. I wish they had included a chapter on the friends that were left behind because this doesn't just affect the family. The last chapter covers the siblings, most of which didn't pertain to me. But I did learn from it.The last two chapters of the book cover the pitfalls and healing. This was what I was looking for. In all, this is a good book to read. It is written well and has a straight-forward, honest approach. I read this in two days and plan to pass it on to my family.

40 of 40 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars The book is wonderfully written for those grieving., September 22, 1999

By A Customer

The authors of the book do an excellent job in describing the different emotions a survivor of suicide is forced to cope with. Having lost a loved one to suicide, I appreciated the authors' use of personal accounts and analyses and it helped me understand the pain, guilt, and anger I was experiencing. It also helped me to see that I will eventually heal; that even when the grieving ends, the love I have for the person won't; and that the process of healing will run its course differently for each person. It is excellently written, it reads fast, and it is a great companion to have around while one is going through this horrible time of loss. I recommend it to anyone who has lost a loved one to suicide, whether it was a parent, child, spouse, friend, or lover.

27 of 28 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A MUST READ for those who have lost someone to suicide, May 18, 2000

By A Customer

In the wake of my husbands recent suicide, I have been filled with guilt and regret. This book has belped me to realize that it was not my fault that he chose to end his life. The most helpful for me was chapter 3. It is Guilt: "We should have...We could have...". I have visited this place many times in the month since his suicide. The book hepled me to also realize that there was nothing more I could have done to prevent this tragedy. No one but the actual victim of suicide is at fault. I recommend this book to all survivors left behind as the result of a suicide. It has helped me to put things into perspective and has given me the tools to get through my grieving process and the hope to one day live a full and happy life again.