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Say When : A Novel
 
 
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Say When : A Novel (Hardcover)

by Elizabeth Berg (Author) "Of course he knew she was seeing someone..." (more)
Key Phrases: ballerina doll, Frank Griffin, Cozy Corner, Grace Woodward (more...)
3.6 out of 5 stars See all reviews (62 customer reviews)


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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly
Husbands frequently tune out their spouses, but Frank Griffin makes valiant attempts to ignore Ellen, his wife of 10 years, when she announces she has a lover and wants a divorce in this endearing, undemanding novel by Berg (True to Form, etc.). Griffin (he goes by his last name) struggles to hold on to his normal life-namely his house and his eight-year-old daughter, Zoe-while repairing his relationship with Ellen. Refreshingly, Berg tells the story from Griffin's point of view: he refuses to leave home, insisting that he and Ellen live as roommates, and tries to wear her down with small acts of kindness. A decent man and a good provider, Griffin is also-he comes to realize-a less-than-exciting partner at times, dismissive of his wife's attempts to get him to read poetry and see art movies, or try anything new at all. Eccentric, shy Ellen, an isolated, stay-at-home mother whose only friend is the waitress at her regular diner, has her own flaws. In trying to live out her adolescence 20-plus years too late, she flaunts her new romance in ways that evoke either disdain or pity for her na‹vet‚. Some readers may feel she gives up her quest for more freedom too quickly; others will appreciate the way she explores her complicated feelings about her marriage. Griffin, meanwhile, makes changes, too, trying a stint as a shopping mall Santa and winning a few dates. Berg has a talent for dialogue, and her skillfully crafted interactions between characters-scenes with tomboy Zoe are always a bright spot-are homey and convincing. These days, separation and divorce are commonplace, but a book that treats those subjects with Berg's tenderness and understanding is not.
Copyright 2003 Reed Business Information, Inc.

From Booklist
Popular author Berg (True to Life [BKL Mr 1 02]) will thrill her fans with this sweet, often humorous novel about loss and reconciliation. Staid, routine-loving Frank Griffin is dealt a horrific blow when Ellen, his wife of 10 years, tells him she has been having an affair and wants a divorce. Who, he poignantly wonders, could know her as well as he does? He refuses to move out of the house and makes snide comments about her auto-mechanic lover (the "greasy paramour") as the two eventually settle into an awkward routine as roommates. Just so he will have somewhere to go on the nights she is not with her lover, he signs up to play Santa at the local shopping mall and meets Donna, an attractive photographer. He throws away his wedding ring and makes a halfhearted attempt to start up a relationship with her, but although she outwardly appears to have it all over his wife--Donna is a wealthy, talented, and classic beauty--he has to admit to himself that he has never met anyone who appealed to him more than Ellen. Berg keeps her story light and funny, shading in the particulars of their relationship with just the right kind of domestic detail. Her insights into the way marriage can sometimes make its partners feel safe and sometimes imprisoned are all the more effective for her deft touch. Joanne Wilkinson
Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved

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Product Details

  • Hardcover: 272 pages
  • Publisher: Atria; First Printing edition (June 3, 2003)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0743411366
  • ISBN-13: 978-0743411363
  • Product Dimensions: 9.3 x 6.4 x 0.9 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1 pounds
  • Average Customer Review: 3.6 out of 5 stars See all reviews (62 customer reviews)
  • Amazon.com Sales Rank: #426,875 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

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Customer Reviews

62 Reviews
5 star:
 (17)
4 star:
 (23)
3 star:
 (9)
2 star:
 (8)
1 star:
 (5)
 
 
 
 
 
Average Customer Review
3.6 out of 5 stars (62 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

 
11 of 11 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars A Searing Story of a Failing Marriage, March 26, 2005
By Cassie W. (Ohio) - See all my reviews
  
Okay, I'm going to go against the overwhelmingly popular opinion of most of the other reviewers and say that I fell in love with this book on the first page--rather, I fell in love with the character of Griffin on the first page. Elizabeth Berg's SAY WHEN chronicles the story of the marriage of Ellen and Griffin, and the affair that causes them to reevaluate their relationship. The novel is written from Griffin's point-of-view and is a searingly honest portrait of the effects of infidelity which, as it turns out, are not wholly negative. Throughout the course of the novel, Griffin is forced to examine his feelings and actions in regards to his wife and face tough questions: Did he unknowingly drive her into the arms of another man? Is there anything he could have done to prevent her affair? Does he really even know his wife? With her trademark humorous, sarcastic prose, Elizabeth Berg once again offers an ingenious novel that touches issues close to every human heart.

I was astonished at Berg's ability to so successfully write from the point of view of a man. Griffin is a multi-layered, realistic character; in him, I saw some of my own husband's traits (only the good ones, of course). He is a brilliantly-honed character that incites sympathy in the reader; likewise, Griffin and Ellen's eight-year-old daughter, Zoe, is equally realistic and sympathetic. Zoe is intelligent, strong-willed, and incredibly observant; with her amazingly revealing dialogue, Berg deftly illustrates the true depth of Zoe's feelings.

The only character I was unable to warm up to was Ellen, Griffin's wife--which perhaps was intentional. I found her to be unreasonably cold, selfish, and unloving. I suppose she is a true representation of what may drive a woman to cheat, but I was constantly wondering throughout the novel why in the world Griffin continued to love her, why he even married her in the first place. Thus, the ending of the novel--which I won't reveal--I found to be unsatisfying and somewhat unrealistic.

But I thoroughly enjoyed this novel. I sympathized with Griffin's plight and was amused by the sharp, strong dialogue between the characters. I have only read one other Berg novel--but after reading this book, I will definitely read more.
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16 of 18 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars SAY WHEN - Berg's best to date, May 28, 2003
By A Customer
Elizabeth Berg is a wonderful novelist with an uncanny way of writing about life's quiet, everyday moments--the ones that make up the fiber of life. I loved True to Form, Never Change, and Open House, and also her novels featuring the young female character first introduced in Durable Goods. SAY WHEN, her new novel, is exquisite. It takes on a subject so many of us have had touch our lives in some way--infidelity--and examines not only what it can do to a marriage, but to a family, and to a husband in particular. Moving, beautiful writing and a thought-provoking message--I can't say enough about this book. Just terrific!
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11 of 12 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars Poignant and gripping tale of a marriage in decline, April 27, 2005
By Tracy Vest (Northern California) - See all my reviews
(TOP 500 REVIEWER)    (REAL NAME)      
This review is from: Say When: A Novel (Paperback)
After his wife Ellen tells him that she is having an affair and wants a divorce, Griffin makes it difficult for her to turn her back on their marriage. He does not want to be a weekend father to their precocious daughter, Zoe. Rather than move out, he stays, and they become unlikely roommates, as he attempts to come to grips with the breakdown of his marriage and what would cause his wife to turn to a much younger man.

Told in the first-person, from Griffin's point of view, it provides a refreshing and poignant look at how time can cause complacency and a sudden jolt can bring about immense change in a relationship. He performs many acts of kindness in an effort to win her back, but as Ellen tells him, it is too little, too late.

An impulsive decision to become a department store Santa has a profound effect on Griffin, as he forges new friendships, attempts to jump back into the dating pool, and strives to understand what led Ellen astray and figure out if perhaps his lack of spontaneity drove her away.

Eventually, the stress of remaining together as roommates (and Griffin waiting up for her after her dates with "Opie") takes its toll, and Ellen branches out for a little independence by getting an apartment. The setting might have changed, but the same problems are still there. As a reader, we are kept guessing until the very end how the relationship will unfold and the effect it will have on Zoe.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews

5.0 out of 5 stars wonderful, relatable pleasure read
This is a novel you can relate to and get lost in and just read for the pleasure of it, like all of Elizabeth Berg's books. Read more
Published 4 months ago by S. Bower

4.0 out of 5 stars Say When
Say When presented itself to me at a time when I needed a book like this. Some of the other reviewers cast the characters off as boring or dumb. Read more
Published 7 months ago by ~jaiDalon~

5.0 out of 5 stars Loved it!
This is my first book by Elizabeth Berg, not my last!! I actually laughed outloud! it was great, and you could feel the husbands torment, the fear of starting over..... Read more
Published 11 months ago by Barbara Cappucci

1.0 out of 5 stars WHAT A WASTE OF TIME !!
WHAT A BORING , NOTHING OF A BOOK.. ANOTHER DUMB WOMAN TRYING TO FIND HERSELF. WHY BOTHER ? HER HUSBAND WAS JUST AS DUMB AND BORING. I CAN'T BELIEVE I FINISHED THIS. Read more
Published 12 months ago by DECEMBER 12

1.0 out of 5 stars Chick Lit. at its worst!
This is the work that solidified my opinion not to read any more Elizabeth Berg novels. I read [The Year of Pleasures] and enjoyed it and have since tried a few of her others all... Read more
Published 17 months ago by A. Dressel

3.0 out of 5 stars Needed a pick up....
When Elizabeth Berg opened her novel with Griffin knowing about his wife's affair, it led me to believe that I had gotten hold of a juicy novel. Read more
Published 22 months ago by Robyn Y. Demby

5.0 out of 5 stars A view into a marriage
This was the first book I read by Elizabeth Berg and I knew I had discovered a good author. She is a master at creating memorable characters, yet ones that are simple and real -... Read more
Published 23 months ago by J. A. Davis

4.0 out of 5 stars Breaking up from a man's perspective...
Griffin readily admits to not being the most attentive man in the world...but it's still a huge shock when his wife Ellen announces that she has a lover and wants a divorce... Read more
Published on June 17, 2007 by Joanna Mechlinski

4.0 out of 5 stars 3 1/2 Stars, and love is NOT a fairytale!
This was my first Elizabeth Berg novel -- I hadn't even heard of her until last year. I love honest, moving stories about love and relationships, and SAY WHEN did not disappoint... Read more
Published on April 13, 2007 by Kharabella

2.0 out of 5 stars A long, meandering journey to nowhere
When couples separate, there is a reason. And one would think that a spouse, left suddenly when his wife announces she has a lover, would use this occasion to learn something... Read more
Published on January 6, 2007 by Cindy Gerlach Mueller

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