Winning with People: Discover the People Principles that Work for You Every Time (Paperback)

~ (Author) "I spent the first twenty-six years of my career as a pastor..." (more)
Key Phrases: winning with people, approachable people, investment question, Percent Principle, People Principles, Celebration Principle (more...)

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

With more than seven million copies of 30-odd titles in print, preacher turned leadership guru Maxwell is a one-man publishing empire. His latest follows the proven format—a series of short, friendly sermons filled with plainspoken common sense. This time, Maxwell takes on interpersonal skills, saying, "All of life's successes come from initiating relationships with the right people and then strengthening those relationships by using good people skills." The book offers 25 chapter-based "People Principles" that explore how to prepare oneself for relationships, focus on others, build trust, invest in others and create win-win relationships. The quality of the content varies. Some chapters, like "The Confrontation Principle" with its six-step "road map for healthy confrontation," are concise, thoughtful and original. Others (particularly in the later sections, where the book starts to run out of steam), such as "The Partnership Principle," are more like motivational talks and offer few practical takeaways. Each principle is introduced with two to three pages featuring a familiar figure—Abraham Lincoln, Barbara Walters, Ben Franklin, Angelina Jolie, etc.—or a personal story from the author's life. Maxwell concludes each principle with a page of discussion questions, which should prove useful since the book doesn't lend itself to a cover-to-cover read and is probably best swallowed one principle at a time, with some reflection in between.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved. --This text refers to the Hardcover edition.

Product Description

Relationships are at the heart of every positive human experience. Maxwell, a master communicator and relational expert, makes learning about relationships accessible to everyone. The most sophisticated leaders and salespeople will pick up on skills that will make them even better, and relational novices will learn skills that can transform them into relational dynamos.

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Paperback: 272 pages
• Publisher: Thomas Nelson (April 3, 2007)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0785288740
• ISBN-13: 978-0785288749
• Product Dimensions: 8.3 x 5.1 x 0.9 inches
• Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.3 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (30 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #56,442 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

  Popular in this category: (What's this?)

  #35 in

  Books > Religion & Spirituality > Authors, A-Z > ( M ) > Maxwell, John C.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

70 of 71 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Enjoyable and edifying, but often superficial , September 29, 2005

By	Roy Massie (Birmingham, AL United States) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Winning With People: Discover the People Principles that Work for You Every Time (Hardcover)

Winning With People takes the reader on a 360-degree tour of our interactions with other people. The book is built around five questions designed to stimulate self-reflection. This helps us see ourselves as others see us and to see them as valuable even when we do not agree or understand them. I suspect almost anyone can find something, perhaps many things, in this book to help them grow in interpersonal skills. Maxwell insists that we be authentic and even sacrificial in our relationships to get along with others. He is absolutely right to instruct us that meeting someone half-way simply is not good enough. If we value the other person (and why shouldn't we?) half-way is just a half hearted approach and the other person will eventually perceive our lack of care towards them.

Maxwell helped me see most of our relational problems are in ourselves. I must take ownership of my shortcomings and strive to correct them. Along with my own housecleaning I must learn to build healthy relationships with others accepting that they too have housecleaning needs they may or may not ever address. Failure in either area on my part (housecleaning or skills building) can quickly destroy relationships I am currently blessed with. The first priority is learning how not to destroy relationships (get the beam out of my own eye), then learn to build good ones.

Maxwell's straightforward style reaches out to everyone using interpersonal examples from sports, pastoring, business, gangsters, marriage, Abraham Lincoln and other great leaders. Also, if you like to collect great quotes as I do, you will find dozens of good ones here (several from honest Abe).

I enjoyed reading the book but I have a few bones to pick that might bother some readers more or less so than they did me. At times I find Maxwell's approach superficial, too much cheerleading and not enough deep reflection. For example, some of the techniques for building up self esteem in others when you know practically nothing about them (p 92-95) strike me as insincere manipulation - calling it sincere doesn't make it so. I also detect some deep underpinnings of consumerism (more is always better) in how Maxwell gauges success. He often refers to who has the largest church attendance or how much the sales grew or other materialistic metrics to indicate success. For example a church with 15,000 members is referred to as being in the top 1% of churches in the country (p212) but no other success criteria are mentioned. In the top 1% by whose standards? Not mine, I don't think the Bible encourages that definition of success. I trust Maxwell is using this as just one convenient guidepost for success, but frankly his writing makes me wonder. I think it is a rather poor way to introduce the success of a church or pastor. These kind of quantitative - grow-baby-grow type examples are common throughout the book. Personally, I think hyper materialism/capitalism is fueling many of our relationship problems. I'm not comfortable having it sprinkled throughout a book on improving relationships.

Finally, there are a few areas where trying to actually adopt what is recommended would drain you in every area of life. P224 recommends: "care more than other think is wise, risk more than others think is safe, dream more than others think is practical, expect more than others think is possible, work more than others think is necessary". Maxwell's point is to live up to our highest ideals, but if I take this advice literally I am likely to damage relationships, not improve them because I'll be utterly exhausted in every area of my life - especially spiritually. If I am not to take it literally then it is just cheerleading to inspire me while I read the book. Perhaps I missed the point, but I don't find this helpful past the initial moment of inspiration.

As you can see I have mixed feelings about the book, but I do recommend it for those who want to be led into some useful self-reflection/emotional inventory for improving relationships.

11 of 11 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Valuable book that can applied to any aspect of life!, June 10, 2006

By	Blaine Greenfield "eclectic reader" (Belle Meade, NJ) - See all my reviews (TOP 500 REVIEWER)    (REAL NAME)

This review is from: Winning With People: Discover the People Principles that Work for You Every Time (Hardcover)

According to John C. Maxwell, author of WINNING WITH PEOPLE
"Our ability to build and maintain
human relationships is the single most important factor in how we get
along--in every area of our life."

Maxwell shows how this can be done in this book in this, his latest book,
provided that you use the 25 people principles that he clearly presents.

In reading it, I felt like I had in front of me an updated version HOW
TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE--the Dale Carnegie
classic . . . what makes WINNING so valuable was the fact that it
has many examples that can be applied to any aspect of our work
lives; e.g., this one:

The best way to keep from stepping on other people's toes is to put
yourself in their shoes. In the 1930's, American Airways, which later
became American Airlines, had a tremendous problem with complaints
from passengers about lost luggage. LaMotte Cohn, general manager
of the airline at that time, tired to get his station managers to overcome
this issue, but he saw little progress. Finally he came upon an idea
to help the airline's personnel to see things from their customers' points
of view. Cohn asked all of the station managers from across the country
to fly to company headquarters for a meeting. Then he made sure that
every manager's luggage was lost in transit. Afterward, the airline
suddenly made a huge leap of efficiency in that area.

I also liked how Maxwell used humor to make other points, such as
in the case with this story:

A middle-aged man entered a cocktail lounge and walked directly
to the bar. "Do you have anything that will cure hiccups?" he asked the
bartender. Without a word, the bartender reached down under the bar,
picked up a wet bar rag, and slapped the man across the face with it.

"Hey! What's the idea?" the astonished man said.

The bartender smiled. "Well, you don't have hiccups anymore,
do you?" he asked.

"I never did," the man replied. "I wanted something to cure my wife.
She's out in the car."

Do you come to conclusions long before the problem has been laid
out before you? That is a common occurrence for most of us who
have strong personalities. That's why I have trained myself to follow a
process to keep me from hammering people with answers before they've
finished asking the question. When someone is sharing his point of view
with me, I try to . . .

listen,
ask questions,
listen again,
ask more questions,
listen some more,
then respond.

Lastly, WINNING WITH PEOPLE taught me much about how to
improve how to improve communication with loved ones . . . here's still another idea that I picked up from
reading this excellent book:

Several years after Margaret and I were married, I realized that when
I got home to see her, there was no excitement in our communication.
She'd ask about what had happened during the day, and I wasn't very
enthusiastic about what had happened during the day, and I wasn't
very enthusiastic about discussing it. Then I figured out why: during
the course of most days, I had shared the most exciting events with
a colleague or my assistant. So I was not all that excited about
repeating it to Margaret. I knew that needed to change. My solution?
Whenever something important or exciting happens during the day,
I jot a note about it on a three-by-five card. And then I don't tell other
people about it; I save it for the end of the day. That way, Margaret is
the first to hear about it, and she is the recipient of my enthusiasm.

21 of 24 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars This is the way a book should be written!, May 27, 2005

By	Shane A. Brewer (Canada) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

This review is from: Winning With People: Discover the People Principles that Work for You Every Time (Hardcover)

This was the first book I've read by John Maxwell and I must say I was very impressed with this book. "Winning With People" identifies several strategies that you can use to help improve all of your relationships including business, marriage, and friendships.

Each chapter starts out with a story that illustrates the point for the chapter, which is then followed with a point-by-point description of each principle. John Maxwell also includes a variety of personal experiences he has had (including several failures and hard lessons) which makes it easy to identify with him.

I honestly could not find anything bad to say about this book. The organization, delivery, and style is flawless.

Full of quotes, references to other books, and just plain good advice, I highly recommend this book to anyone wanting to improve their relationships. 5 out of 5 stars.