How Long Does It Hurt: A Guide to Recovering from Incest and Sexual Abuse for Teenagers, Their Friends, and Their Families (Paperback)

by Cynthia L. Mather (Author), Judy Wood (Illustrator), Eliana Gil (Foreword), Kristina E. Debye (Contributor) "I WAS TWELVE YEARS OLD that night and believed I was the only person in the world who was living a nightmare..." (more)
Key Phrases: abuser win, responsibility session, abuse stop, Emergency Stage, Victims of Crime Act, Yellow Pages (more...)

Editorial Reviews

Review
"The many aspects and complexities of incest and sexual abuse are well covered in this book. Notwithstanding the comprehensive presentation of factual information, its strength lies in its emphasis on empowerment and healing. How Long Does It Hurt? fully achieves its claim as a guide to recovering from incest and sexual abuse for teenagers, their friends, and their families and will likely fulfill the author's wish that teens will learn that they are not alone and can successfully continue on from the pain."

Review
"Excellent! Unique! Worthwhile! . . .Addresses an exhaustive range of issues pertinent to sexual abuse survivors and does so in a manner that is dynamic, engaging, and straightforward."
--Family Violence and Sexual Assault Bulletin

"How Long Does It Hurt? fully achieves its claim as a guide to recovering from incest and sexual abuse for teenagers, their friends, and their families and will likely fulfill the author’s wish that teens will learn that they are not alone and can successfully continue on from the pain."
--The University of Kansas, Journal of Pediatric Psychology

"The most helpful aspects of the book are the case examples and testimonials of victims. Especially useful are the personalized descriptions of possible reactions in self or from others and the accompanying message to have the strength and courage to find a way to recover despite the obstacles."
--Violence and Victims

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Product Details

• Paperback: 288 pages
• Publisher: Jossey-Bass; Revised edition (November 29, 2004)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0787975699
• ISBN-13: 978-0787975692
• Product Dimensions: 8.9 x 6 x 0.9 inches
• Shipping Weight: 11.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.8 out of 5 stars See all reviews (11 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #166,983 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

23 of 24 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars first real healing experience, December 15, 2002

By	"sasah832" (Indiana) - See all my reviews

This review is from: How Long Does it Hurt?: A Guide to Recovering from Incest and Sexual Abuse for Teenagers, Their Friends, and Their Families (Paperback)

This book is great. I started reading books on the subject of sexual abuse when I was 15 (when I told) and am now 19. I have read all of the popular book out there on this subject (paticularly The Courage to Heal by Ellen Bass) and have found others helpful, but none of them have ever compared to How Long Does it Hurt. It helped me a lot to realize that what happened to me was horrific and was really abuse and that it was okay for me to feel the things that I did. I'd recommend this book to any and every survivor out there. Teenager or not. It very well could be a lifesaver.

20 of 21 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars The best book out there!, September 24, 2005

By	DLR LADC,LICSW - See all my reviews

I am a therapist with a private clinical practice, working primarily with adolescents and women of all ages who are survivors of some form of trauma, including sexual abuse and incest. I have to say, that this is the book I use most, with all ages, including women who are uncovering and dealing with painful abuse memories. Over and over I hear clients proclaim that the book and quotes from other survivors help them not feel so alone and to also understand better what happened to them and to know there is hope. Also, the way in which the author discloses her own incest history and recovery is refreshing and hopeful and establishes a climate of credibility and trust. In my 20 years of clinical practice and training, I have aquired and read $1000's of dollars worth of trauma books and materials and this book sits as one of the top and most frequently used resources. Also, there is a children's book called "BRAVE BART" which has been a wonderful resource for adult survivors as well as children and adolescent survivors.
D.
(Licensed Clinical Social Worker/Licensed Alcohol and Drug Abuse Counselor)

15 of 15 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars This Book is Truly a Life-Saver, December 12, 2001

By A Customer

This review is from: How Long Does it Hurt?: A Guide to Recovering from Incest and Sexual Abuse for Teenagers, Their Friends, and Their Families (Paperback)

I bought this book two years ago at age 18. It has become a type of bible for me. It answered all the questions that were swarming around in my head and let me know I wasn't alone. I've highlighted passages to discuss with my therapist or my family and I re-read it regularly. I recommend it to anyone who has has or knows someone who has been abused.