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Wiped!: Life with a Pint-size Dictator (Paperback)

by Rebecca Eckler (Author)
Key Phrases: professional babyproofer, pre baby, spin classes, Nanny Mimi, Rebecca Eckler, Diaper Genie (more...)
2.1 out of 5 stars See all reviews (11 customer reviews)

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Editorial Reviews

Product Description
“Pregnancy was a 90-minute massage compared to life now.”

After her little bundle of joy, Rowan (aka The Dictator) arrives, Rebecca Eckler wonders when the promised “rewarding” part will kick in. She wasn’t supposed to trade in tight jeans for baggy sweatpants, or give up the dream of sound sleep and a passionate sex life. Yet, even in the throes of her exhaustion, Rebecca gleans and shares some sound advice for modern moms, including everything you need to know on

• The Diaper Genie: “It’s been six weeks and we have yet to use this ‘must-have’ baby item because we can’t figure out how the damn thing works.”
• Achievement: “No matter how well I had done in school, no matter what my career accomplishments were, my mother had never been so proud of me as when I gave birth.”
• Keeping up appearances: “How is it possible that I haven’t had a drink in months, yet still look worse than I ever did hung over?”
• The effectiveness of baby monitors: “You can hear a baby screaming through walls. Unless you live in the Taj Mahal and place your baby at the other end of the palace, there is no way you won’t hear her cry.”
• Size matters: “I had made the mistake of trying on a pair of pre-pregnancy jeans, which I couldn’t get up past my knees. It was the worst decision I have ever made.”

With the same dry wit as her hilarious chronicle Knocked Up: Confessions of a Hip Mother-to-be, Eckler sets the record straight on being a new mom: the highs, the lows, and the sheer bliss that comes when you’re dealing with the demands of someone who’s not very large but undeniably in charge.

Praise for Knocked Up

“Painfully funny . . . biting wit.”
Los Angeles Times

“Quirky and outlandish.”
New York Daily News

Product Details

  • Paperback: 320 pages
  • Publisher: Villard; 1 edition (April 17, 2007)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0812976401
  • ISBN-13: 978-0812976403
  • Product Dimensions: 8.2 x 5.2 x 0.6 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 6.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 2.1 out of 5 stars See all reviews (11 customer reviews)
  • Amazon.com Sales Rank: #732,121 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

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Customer Reviews

11 Reviews
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 (4)
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Average Customer Review
2.1 out of 5 stars (11 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

 
10 of 11 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars Put This Book In the Diaper Genie, June 18, 2007
By Meridith Braun (London, ON Canada) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
I'm not really sure where to begin. This book is a complete disaster, well actually Rebecca Eckler is a complete disaster as a writer and possibly a mom. Her writing is completely uninspired and pretty hokey not to mention the unnecessary bad language littered throughout. As a new parent, I was hoping to get some comic relief along with finding some relatable situations and hearing how someone else dealt with them but the entire book is filled with superficial complaints that come off as an adult tantrum rather than anything else and none of it is funny. I actually worry for the Dictator's future...Eckler is the epitomy of the problems with parenting today. I want the 2 days of time back that I spent reading this drivel (my money back would be nice too). I hope this review saves you from losing the same 2 days (and your money).
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10 of 11 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars The definition of obnoxious, May 30, 2007
Here's a summary of the book:

- the baby is loud and soils itself
- the mommy is physically uncomfortable and moody
- the daddy is not helpful

I really hope that "Rebecca Eckler" is a fictional character created by an author named Rebecca Eckler, as I find it hard to believe that anyone could really be this whiny, obnoxious, and self-centered about parenthood. Sure, there's a "culture shock" that all new parents go through (I myself am one), but rather than provide humorous new insight on the transition process and the joys of parenthood, this book reads like the badly-written blog of someone desperate to impress their friends back home.

With all the things that can go wrong with a pregnancy, this person (the character and/or the author) needs to be told to shut up, quit whining, and count their blessings. It's as if she's the first person IN THE WHOLE WORLD EVER to have a baby. Ugh.

There's a lot to laugh about when it comes to babies and parenting (especially first-time parenting). Unfortunately, Eckler seems to think that throwing around swear words and playing to predictable caricatures is a substitute for actually being funny.

A complete waste of time. Avoid.
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7 of 8 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars The worst book I ever finished, August 12, 2007
The only reason I finished this book is because I kept waiting for it to get better. Steer clear of this one unless:
-You are too lazy/dumb to figure out how to use a diaper pail
-You own a Porsche and want everyone else to know about it
-You own two Bugaboo strollers and want everyone to know about it
-You refer to Grover as "the blue bear"
-You live in a two bedroom condo, A TWO BEDROOM CONDO (oh the horror)
-You have the ability to go to Hawaii for a few months and want everyone to know about it
-You get a nanny in Hawaii and you want everyone to know about it
-You only spend two hours a day with your child but are "wiped"
-You are too lazy to microwave the home made baby food that your nanny made, so you buy some instead
-You have a nanny and want everyone to know about it
-You are too lazy to baby-proof your own home so you "write a big check" to a "professional"
-You are so self-centered that you continue to take your child to restaurants despite misbehavior
-You enjoy books that have enough substance for 20 pages but are stretched out to 307

I could go on and on. The only props I give the author is for addressing her postpartum depression.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews

4.0 out of 5 stars Dictators RULE!
This book made me laugh so hard I almost . . . well, you know what. I thought I was the only one who felt this way about having a toddler (dictator)!
Published 17 months ago by J. Daniel

1.0 out of 5 stars Poor Baby...literally
Fortunately for me, I found this book at the library and therefore was spared from wasting $15 dollars on quite possibly one of the worst books I have ever read in my life. Read more
Published 24 months ago by R. Durnell

4.0 out of 5 stars Entertaining and light-hearted read
As a new mother who sometimes needs a break from reading educational books on raising babies and children, I found this book entertaining and funny. Read more
Published on June 29, 2007 by New Mom

1.0 out of 5 stars Do NOT waste your money!!
This book should have been funny. The perils of being a new mother, from the confusing plethora of "must-have" baby products to the endless sources of annoyance (yes inlaws, well... Read more
Published on June 28, 2007 by J.J

4.0 out of 5 stars Entertaining and interesting
I found this book entertaining and fun to read. While Rebecca Eckler is (gasp!!) honest about some of the negative aspects of motherhood, she also talks about how much she loves... Read more
Published on June 25, 2007 by Bearette24

1.0 out of 5 stars My baby's diaper fillings are preferable to this
If you like your heroines brainless, self-centered, and altogether unlikeable, you may enjoy this book. Read more
Published on June 18, 2007 by Hoopty Frood

1.0 out of 5 stars Don't waste your money...
Not a good book. Not a funny book. It's an expletive-riddled story written by a self-centered, abrasive, irritating, whiny, egomaniac who is impossible to connect with. Read more
Published on June 12, 2007 by bookworm

4.0 out of 5 stars lighthearted and irreverent mom mentoring
No longer the star as she was in KNOCKED UP: CONFESSIONS OF A HIP MOTHER-TO-BE (not reviewed), Rebecca Eckler continues her diary entry muses; this time as the Dictator", Sir... Read more
Published on May 2, 2007 by Harriet Klausner

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