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Men and Marriage (Hardcover)

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4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (17 customer reviews)

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Editorial Reviews

Product Description

A chilling indictment on the state of the American family, and the recent drive to deny the fundamental differences between the sexes, Men and Marriage is "an outstandingly important and well-argued book, strangely moving in its combination of scholarly dilligence, common sense, courage, and devotion to the res publica of human civilization."--National Review.


About the Author

George Gilder is author of several books on social and economic issues. He was a speech writer for President Reagan and now writes regularly for the Wall Street Journal and Harpers. --This text refers to the Paperback edition.

Product Details

  • Hardcover: 240 pages
  • Publisher: Pelican Publishing Company; Rep Sub edition (August 1992)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0882894447
  • ISBN-13: 978-0882894447
  • Product Dimensions: 9.1 x 5.9 x 0.9 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 12 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (17 customer reviews)
  • Amazon.com Sales Rank: #97,137 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

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    #62 in  Books > Health, Mind & Body > Relationships > Dating

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Men and Marriage
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Men and Marriage 4.4 out of 5 stars (17)
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Customer Reviews

17 Reviews
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106 of 114 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars An Outstanding Work, July 6, 2000
By Stephen N. Shields (Ellicott City, MD USA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
This review is from: Men and Marriage (Paperback)
Men and Marriage benefits the modern reader in a number of ways. Providing excellent data and analysis on males and females in modern society, the book enables its reader to better understand the modern controversy over men and women's respective roles in society. Gilder feels that one of modern society's key problems is its denials of the differences between the sexes and, as a logical corollary, its denial of appropriate roles. He writes, "Though rejecting feminist politics and lesbian posturing, American culture has absorbed the underlying ideology like a sponge. The principal tenets of sexual liberation or sexual liberalism--the obsolescence of masculinity and femininity, of sex roles, and of heterosexual monogamy as the moral norm--have diffused through the system and become part of America's conventional wisdom." Gilder has also performed an invaluable service by providing relevant material for couples and singles. Gilder wants the single woman to u! nderstand that if she decides to sacrifice her twenties on the altar of career, she could easily find herself a celibate priest serving that altar for the rest of her life. Gilder reports that Yale and Harvard sociologists, after analyzing census data, concluded that a woman who waits until her mid-thirties only has a 5% chance of getting married. The author also has much to say to the single man. Of the most unique and striking of Gilder's observations on the sexes is his contention that the average single man struggles with an inherent irresponsibility that only marriage can cure. While this assertion may have had a secure, albeit covert, place in yesterday's conventional wisdom, Gilder boldly presents the thesis with impressive statistical support. Single men are 30% more likely than single women to be unemployed. If they get a job, the single man will make very little more than his single girlfriend, in striking contrast to the substantial earning power of the married! man who takes home 70% more income. Single college gradua! tes will normally earn about the same as married graduates of high school. Gilder suggests, "It could well be more important for an ambitious young man to get married than to go to college" (p. 63). Demographically, except possibly for the divorced, the single most disturbed group in the United States is single men. Between the ages of 25 and 65 the single man is 30% more likely than single women to be depressed. He is 30% more likely to exhibit a tendency toward phobias and passivity. The unmarried man is three times more likely to experience a nervous breakdown and 22 times more likely to be committed to an institution because of mental disease. And these statistics are not just cause for sympathy for the single man, but a cause for concern. For 90% of all violent crime is committed by single men even though above the age of 14 they only make up about 13% of the population. The statistics and analyses that Gilder provides on singleness leads to another vita! l area that he addresses. A theme that Gilder resounds with great force is the degree to which a healthy society is in fact dependent on the health of its families. He writes, "As a social institution, marriage transcends all individuals. The health of a society, its collective vitality, ultimately resides in its concern for the future, its sense of a connection with generations to come" (p. 16). While the first six chapters of the Gilder's tome, which focus on sexual roles, are easily worth price of the book; its remainder is a tour de force on the relationship of modern sexual thought and the ghetto, welfare, homosexuality, the workplace, education, politics, and biogenetic engineering. While many will view this work as an anachronistic throwback to the 50s, it's empirical support of its major theses gives the reader pause.
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23 of 23 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Equality is Not 'Sameness', April 12, 2008
This review is from: Men and Marriage (Paperback)
This book received a lot of flack when it first came out. The demand for equality among men and women was finally being accepted as a proper ideal for a civilized society, and anyone who disagreed was deservedly shouted down. But amidst the great din, it was presumed with terrible shallowness that any thoughtful challenge was traitorous activity (This, unfortunately, is often still the case.) George Gilder was one of the first to point out that 'equality' does not mean 'sameness', that acknowledging the equality of women does not mean that men and women think, feel, or ought to act, in the same ways, or that it is 'bad' to examine the question of whether there might be gender roles that are indeed sensible, virtuous, and possibly even wonderful. As we look back over the years since the feminist movement began, we cannot honestly say that the changes we have made have made everyone happy. It is worth going back and taking a calm, thoughtful, fresh look at the challenges that George Gilder raised in this book.
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13 of 14 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Both academic and entertaining..., July 7, 2006
By Charles Bevel "Aspiring Patriarch" (Cleveland, OH United States) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
I agree with a lot of what previous posters have said but would like to add that Mr. Gilder is indeed a gifted writer. The book is replete with "laugh-out-loud" witicism interspersed between salient point after salient point. I loved it.

As an African American who grew up in a working class neighborhood which, over the 20 years since my departure, has deteriorated almost to the point of "ghetto", I can say unequivocally that whatever Gilder points out concerning the general population indeed goes triple for the African American community. If America has drunken the feminist "kool-aid" and relegated husbandhood and fatherhood to the trash heap of obselescence, the black community has taken said "kool-aid" intravenously...and it shows!

Thanks Mr. Gilder for you engaging contribution to sanity.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews

5.0 out of 5 stars As relevant today as when it was written
I have no idea why George Gilder's 1987 book, "Men and Marriage," escaped my attention until a copy was given to me this year (2009). Read more
Published 16 days ago by Volkert Volkersz

5.0 out of 5 stars Men and Marriage
Years ago George Gilder published Sexual Suicide, then revised and expanded and renamed it Men and Marriage (Gretna, LA: Pelican Publishing Company, c. 1986). Read more
Published 7 months ago by Gerard Reed

5.0 out of 5 stars George Guilder
I was very pleased with George Guilder's book on Men and Marriage. Perhaps he is a little heavy on evolutionary causes of men as hunters of women. Read more
Published 8 months ago by Donald A. Tag

2.0 out of 5 stars Weird book
While I agree with Gilder that a return to marriage and family is nothing but positive for society, I absolutely disagree with returning to traditional gender roles unless that is... Read more
Published 23 months ago by Reader

5.0 out of 5 stars Greg Cello
This book is essential to the becoming of age man (as well as woman) to show him that our society and the individuals in our society thrive of marriage and family values. Read more
Published 23 months ago by Gregory J. Cello

3.0 out of 5 stars Review of marriage stats
The reviewer before me mentioned some interesting statistics about married versus single men. The writer of the book used his statistics to sugest that for men's success getting... Read more
Published on May 17, 2006 by J. Robins

5.0 out of 5 stars This book changed my attitude toward marriage.
I grew up in a disfunctional family situation and I thought all through my twenties that I never ever wanted to get married. Read more
Published on March 31, 2006 by lighten_up_already2

4.0 out of 5 stars Still Worthwhile.
I'm going to have to disagree with some of the reviewers here because, while I definitely appreciate this book, Men and Marriage is dated at this point in time. Read more
Published on December 2, 2005 by Bernard Chapin

4.0 out of 5 stars not bad, not bad at all
I just finished George Gilder's Men & Mariage, and I have to say that he makes a lot of good points. Read more
Published on November 4, 2004 by Patrick Michelson

1.0 out of 5 stars Well written fiction
In trying to counteract the perils of feminism in modern society without appearing too biased, Gilder goes ludicrously overboard by offering the "savage barbarian"... Read more
Published on July 23, 2004 by philosopheRon

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