Bring Out The Best In Your Child And Yourself: The Wisdom and Skills You Need to Create the Family You Want (Paperback)

by Ilene Val-Essen Ph.D. (Author)

Editorial Reviews

Review
"A godsend for parents. Valuable insights, effective skills and true wisdom. Brief yet practical." -- AAP News (American Assn. for the Advancement of Psychosynthesis)

"A rare gem...Every family should have it!" -- Kimberly Kirbeger, co-author of the best-seller, "Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul."

"This book is elegant...the illustrations delightful..." -- Jean Illsey Clarke, co-author, "Growing Up Again: Parenting Ourselves, Parenting Our Children."

Product Description
Parents learn to bring out the best within each child or teen -- and discover the best within themselves. Understand your children at a deeper level: they actually want to be their best. Difficult behavior is, in reality, a cry for help. Recognizing that truth transforms the relationship; you see with new eyes. Learn why all parents "lose it" at times and receive practical help through an effective Three-Step Process. Humorous illustrations and exercises help you develop the skills and attitudes which enable you to create the family you want -- a family based on mutual respect.

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Product Details

• Paperback: 208 pages
• Publisher: Quality Parenting (August 1, 1999)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 096753710X
• ISBN-13: 978-0967537108
• Product Dimensions: 10.8 x 8.4 x 0.5 inches
• Shipping Weight: 15.2 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.8 out of 5 stars See all reviews (6 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #1,804,323 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

5 of 5 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A Complete Parenting Philosophy, May 15, 2001

By	Ann Holabird, M.A. (Hollywood, CA) - See all my reviews

As a therapist and a parent, I am continually searching for the ultimate parenting book that I feel comfortable recommending to clients because it has worked for my family. I have found that book in "Bring out the Best." It's more than just a handbook of practical parenting skills, it presents a complete parenting philosophy that is respectful, insightful, forgiving and non-shaming. The beauty of the book is that it is simultaneously individual and universal. Rather than dishing out cookie-cutter parenting skills, Dr. Val-Essen asks the reader to explore the ideal parent that you would like to be and leads you through the process of making that dream a reality. After reading this book, I have developed a new level of respect for my children. I see them more clearly as seperate individuals. I have learned to recognize their unique strengths and to work with them rather than againzst them. In a sense, I have fallen in love with my children all over again. These new insights, coupled with Dr. Val-Essens's emphasis on assertion skills, has helped transform our family. We communicate more openly, enjoy each other more genuinely, and the level of cooperation in our home has risen dramatically. Parenting is not only the most difficult job anyone will ever undertake, it is also the most humbling. Dr. Val-Essen's book gently guides the reader through this process with honesty and compassion. As a result, I feel more confident in my abilities as a parent and my children reap the benefits. What could be better? I highly recommend this book.

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A Real Life Saver for Anguished Parents, May 16, 2001

By	DEM (Appleton, WI United States) - See all my reviews

I was fortunate enough to find this book during a most difficult time in the life of my (then) 15 year old daughter. She was one of those children that challenged every family structure and desire for peaceful coexistence. The love was unquestioned, but the pain we were experiencing was also profound. Through this book, I learned to reframe the difficulties and experiences -- and have more emotional distance so that I could truly be an effective parent for my daughter. It was a long and gradual road but today I am very grateful to report that my daughter and I are VERY close and she is building a healthy and happy life for herself. We both thank Dr. Val Essen for her significant contributions to our family relationships.

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars How to build trusting relationships, April 22, 2001

By A Customer

This book came very highly recommended by a teacher of a parenting class. I purchased it because I am a classroom elementary school teacher and because my brother needed some quality parenting tips. I COULD NOT PUT IT DOWN!!! When I recommend this book, I don't recommend it to parents exclusively. It is more about fostering relationships and helping people to achieve their highest potentials. It deserves a wide readership and is not limited to interactions with children. To me, this book is a whole philosophy of life (as in the quotations it includes from Mandella and Goethe)and has applications far beyond building family relationships. It addresses all meaningful interactions and relations with others. It is a book about building trusting relationships and has a wonderful philosophy of life.