The Four Seasons of Marriage (Paperback)

by Gary Chapman (Author)
Key Phrases: season your marriage, spouse succeed, relationship this week, Dead Sea, Babbling Brooks, Kingdom of God (more...)

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly
Chapman, author of the longstanding megaseller The Five Love Languages, uses his years of marriage counseling and leading marriage seminars as the basis for his thesis that marriages repeatedly go through periods that can be characterized by the seasons of the year. He begins by describing winter, times when marriages are marked by "coldness, harshness, and bitterness." Spring is "where most marriages begin," while summer is filled with fun. He compares an autumn marriage to "the falling of the leaves." Chapman offers detailed explanations of the emotions, attitudes and actions of the marriage seasons as well as the pros and cons of each. The book's second section provides seven strategies to enhance or change the marriage seasons, from dealing with past failures and speaking your spouse's love language to "maximizing differences" and becoming a positive influence. Chapman also specifically addresses how to improve a marriage where a spouse has no desire to change. While it's valuable to have this information in one place, this book isn't different from what Chapman has written, said and taught many times before. Clear writing, tested strategies and good stories are here, but new revelations are not. (Sept.)
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved. --This text refers to the Hardcover edition.

Product Description
Dr. Gary Chapman, author of the perennial best seller The Five Love Languages, provides an easy-to-grasp framework to help couples understand their marriage and seven practical strategies for strengthening or improving their marriage relationship. A valuable resource for couples regardless of how long they've been married, this biblically based book is a reference tool to help couples through every season of marriage.

Summary of features:

• Valuable insight for every couple, regardless of how long they have been married.
• Provides seven practical strategies to help couples understand and strengthen their marriage relationship.
• Includes a Marital Seasons Profile to help couples determine the season of their marriage.

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Product Details

• Paperback: 240 pages
• Publisher: Tyndale House Publishers (April 10, 2007)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1414300239
• ISBN-13: 978-1414300238
• Product Dimensions: 8.9 x 6 x 0.8 inches
• Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.8 out of 5 stars See all reviews (13 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #5,435 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

31 of 31 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A helpful book that will appeal to Christians having marriage troubles, September 30, 2005

By	FaithfulReader.com (New York, New York) - See all my reviews

This review is from: The Four Seasons of Marriage (Hardcover)

Is your marriage in the season of summer, spring, winter, or fall? Find out in THE FOUR SEASONS OF MARRIAGE, from bestselling author Gary Chapman who penned THE FIVE LOVE LANGUAGES.

Chapman's tone is that of a friendly, empathetic counselor. First, he invites you to discover which season of marriage you and your spouse are in. These seasons don't progress in order; rather, your marriage is probably fluctuating back and forth between all four, he writes. After you identify your season, Chapman offers seven strategies to help you make the most of that season, and ideas for putting the strategies into practice. As he unpacks the characteristics of each season, Chapman includes profiles of married couples who have come to him for advice and counseling. His hope is to help couples move their marriages from fall or winter into spring or summer.

Marriage, Chapman writes, is both intimate and purposeful. When intimacy --- sharing life in a deep way --- is not attained, we feel troubled. Marriage is also purposeful. It helps us raise our children, and in nurturing and developing our gifts and abilities. "Life is easier when two hearts and minds are committed to working together to face the challenges of the day," he writes.

Spring is where most marriages begin. There is joy, excitement and an anticipation of the future. It's a time of new beginnings and positive changes. Summer means happiness, peace, satisfaction, fun and comfort. There is a sense of accomplishment and a desire to keep growing as a couple. You overlook your spouse's shortcomings, and there is a growing sense of togetherness.

Fall, of course, is a precursor to winter, characterized by sadness, apprehension and rejection. A spouse might feel insecure. The couple drifts apart, disengages. An affair may happen, catapulting the marriage into winter. Winter, he writes, is characterized by the emotions of hurt, anger, disappointment, loneliness and rejection. Our attitude is usually bad. We see problems as too big or unresolvable. Our actions include withdrawal, silence, harsh words and even violent acts. Divorce can be just around the corner. "The marriage is like two people living in separate igloos," writes Chapman.

If you find yourself in a fall or winter season, Chapman assures you this is not hopeless. This leads to the easy marital profile indicator quiz, which may seem a bit simplistic. Next, Chapman unpacks the seven strategies for enhancing the season you find yourself in, from dealing with past failures (confession, repentance, forgiveness), to a very concrete set of ideas about empathetic listening. The third strategy, "Learn to speak your spouse's love language," will feel familiar to readers of THE FIVE LOVE LANGUAGES, and recaps the ideas from that book. The seventh strategy is one that a spouse can read and implement alone if the other spouse is resistant to working on the marriage. A study guide at the end of the book is suitable for group discussion, with alternate questions for a couple's private use.

There are a few small troubles. Chapman is already touting his THE FIVE LOVE LANGUAGES by page 26 as he does throughout the book, as well as heavily pushing marriage conferences. Both are worthy things to recommend, but it does feel a bit self-promotional. (He's a popular speaker at marriage conferences.) Some of the analogies feel overly cute (the problems in the season of summer are "yellowjackets," for example; in spring, it's "poison ivy").

But these are minor flaws in a helpful book that should mainly appeal to Christians whose marriages are in trouble, or to fans of Chapman's THE FIVE LOVE LANGUAGES. Small groups and counselors will appreciate the study guide tucked into the back to help with further explorations.

--- Reviewed by Cindy Crosby. Contact Cindy at (...)

21 of 23 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Something To Talk About!, September 28, 2005

By	M. HOLCK - See all my reviews

This review is from: The Four Seasons of Marriage (Hardcover)

One of the most beneficial features of this book is the fact that Dr. Chapman describes the emotional seasons of marriage and gives them names we're all familair with - using the seasons. (You can take a free quiz to see your marriage season at 4seasonsofmarriage.com - no personal infomation asked for, either, not even email!) This season idea is very easy for any married couple to grasp and, once a couple identifies the season or seasons they are in, Dr. Chapman's book provides the language and the guidance for a couple to talk about their relationship openly and in a somewhat more observational role when one uses the seasonal analogy. The book is written for any married couple - no matter how many years married. It addresses happy couples and how to sustain the happiness as well as couples in trouble and providines strategies for improvement. A great tool to have on the shelf for all the years of marriage! I find it invaluable.

10 of 11 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars The Four Seasons of Marriage, February 23, 2006

By	Darcie Caudillo (Daphne, AL) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

This review is from: The Four Seasons of Marriage (Hardcover)

My husband & I are teaching a small group on this book. We've taught "The 5 Love Languages" several times and find this book as an excellent follow-up study. Dr. Chapman is very insightful in the realm of marriage. We have seen many marriages do a 180 in our small groups because couples have taken to heart the suggestions in these books by Dr. Chapman. God really uses him through his counselling and writing! Praise the Lord for Dr. Chapman's obedience!