The 7 Worst Things Parents Do (Paperback)

~ John C. Friel Ph.D. (Author), Linda D. Friel M.A. (Author) "What could turn intelligent, independent-minded adults into virtual wimps?..." (more)
Key Phrases: Erik Erikson, United States, Donald Meichenbaum

Editorial Reviews

Product Description

Psychologists John and Linda Friel have written an enormously readable and infinitely practical book that explores some of the worst mistakes we can make as parents, and guides us through examples and ideas on how change can be effected immediately. The Friels examine the seven most ineffective and self-defeating behaviors that parents display again and again. Working from the ideas that even small changes can have big results, the authors give parents concrete steps they can take to end these behaviors and improve the quality of their parenting. Whether you're contemplating starting a family, have children who haven't entered school yet, are struggling with rebellious teenagers, or are empty-nesters wondering how to be better parents to your grown children, you can't afford not to read this book. With the same clarity and concrete examples that have sold over 350,000 copies of their books, the Friels offer readers forty years of combined experience as practicing psychologists, and fifty years of combined experience as blended-family parents. The material in The 7 Worst Things Parents Can Do has been field-tested in the authors' own household, with hundreds of their clients, and with thousands of their workshop and Clearlife Clinic participants. It will cause immediate changes in your behavior, in your child's behavior and will improve the lives you share together.

About the Author

John Friel maintains an active training and speaking schedule in the addictions field, and is known for his practical, innovative, powerful and compassionate presentation and training style. Whether speaking to the general public or to professionals, he has the ability to handle difficult or painful material with a fine balance of competence, sensitivity, gentle humor and professionalism that has made him one of the top trainers in the country.

The Friels are known throughout the U.S., Canada, England, and Ireland for their therapeutic and training expertise in the areas of family systems, survivors of unhealthy childhoods, depression, anxiety, addictions and personality disorders. They are founders and national directors of the ClearLife/Lifeworks Clinic, which is a special four-day therapy program to help people move beyond the painful patterns of childhood shortages. Their first two books, Adult Children: The Secrets of Dysfunciontal Families and An Adult Child's Guide to What's Normal, are now considered classics in the field and are widely read by both professionals and the general public. The Friels offer individual, couples and family therapy was well as conducting several weekly, ongoing men's and women's therapy groups.

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Product Details

• Paperback: 194 pages
• Publisher: HCI; 1 edition (January 1, 1999)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1558746684
• ISBN-13: 978-1558746688
• Product Dimensions: 8.4 x 5.4 x 0.7 inches
• Shipping Weight: 11.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (15 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #191,577 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

30 of 33 people found the following review helpful:

3.0 out of 5 stars Good common sense tips, October 26, 1999

By A Customer

Most "parenting" books have common goals (e.g how to raise a happy, moral, responsible, self-confident child that achieves his/her full potential). The books just disagree about the best way to achieve these goals. In this book, however, I found myself disagreeing with the stated goals of good parenting. The Friels describe several examples of parenting "failures" that I would consider successes. For example, if your 24 year old daughter says her mother is her best friend, she's a failure (and you've failed as a parent). If your child graduates from college and turns down a good job across the country in favor of a lesser paying job closer to home, you've raised a dependent, clingy person who failed to separate from family appropriately. I guess one person's pathological intertwined relationship is someone else's good close family tie! Nevertheless, the book contains lots of good old-fashioned common-sense advice about raising children and I enjoyed the book thoroughly.

22 of 24 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Great Parenting Book, January 8, 2002

By	catdogkidsfirst (USA) - See all my reviews

The authors explains the 7 worst things parents do:
Baby Your Child
Put Your Marriage Last
Push Your Child INto Too Many Activities
Ignore Your Emotional or Spiritual Life
Be Your Child's Best Friend
Fail to give Your Child Structure
Expect Your Child to Fulfil Your Dreams

I rated it 4 stars because I felt that the topics weren't throughly discussed on how we can avoid falling in one of the 7 traps.

22 of 26 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Great advice and easy book to read & understand, August 14, 2002

By A Customer

Part 1: Get Ready
Chapter 1: The Seven Worst Things Parents Do
Chapter 2: The Rules of the Game

Part 2: The Seven
Chapter 3: Baby Your Child
Chapter 4: Put Your Marriage Last
Chapter 5 Push Your Child into Too Many Activities
Chapter 6: Ignore Your Emotional or Spiritual Life
Chapter 7: Be Your Child's Best Friend
Chapter 8: Fail to Give Your Child Structure
Chapter 9: Expect Your Child to Fulfil Your Dreams

Part III: Go For It
Chapter 10: If Rats Can Do It, So Can You
Chapter 11: The Best Things About Parents Who Choose to Grow: A Typical Success Story
Chapter 12: Some Final Parenting Thoughts

In this book, I agreed much of what the authors wrote about how to avoid the 7 mistakes. There was a few tips of advice that I disagreed with such as putting your child to bed at the same time everynight with NO exceptions such as watching fireworks.