The Gift of Our Compulsions: A Revolutionary Approach to Self-Acceptance and Healing (Paperback)

~ (Author) "I trust myself..." (more)
Key Phrases: fuel our compulsions, own deep knowing, cultivating curiosity, The Gift of Our, Exercise After, Returning Practice (more...)

Editorial Reviews

Product Description

Everyone is compulsive to some degree. People may worry too much, work too hard, or overindulge in food or alcohol or drug use. Once a compulsion is admitted, the usual option is to try to control the behavior. But this effort typically ends with the problem returning, or a new one taking its place.

In this book based on three decades of research and teaching, Mary O'Malley has crafted a new approach, with simple exercises and techniques and an inspiring tone. People are compulsive for a reason, she says, and by observing the things they are compulsive about and engaging those compulsions, readers can begin to understand them and change their actions around them. The book's exercises help readers in the engagement process by teaching them to ask the right questions and shows why lasting healing comes from being curious rather than controlling, and self-acceptance comes through forgiveness, not shame.

Product Details

• Paperback: 352 pages
• Publisher: New World Library (September 28, 2004)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1577314700
• ISBN-13: 978-1577314707
• Product Dimensions: 8.8 x 5.7 x 0.9 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (13 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #110,360 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

16 of 16 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars The best I've found, March 19, 2005

By	sunset hawaii (Southern California) - See all my reviews

This is the best book on the topic of compulsions that I have ever seen. What impressed me the most were some simple and quick to do exercises that, simply put, have worked every time I've taken the 30 seconds or so to do them. Frankly I'm amazed at the power of this book.
I met the author briefly after a lecture she gave, and I give her an even higher recommendation than the book. She's one of the real ones.

11 of 11 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars I recommend this book highly, March 18, 2005

By	Robin Friend (Yelm, WA USA) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

We all engage in compulsive behaviors and have compulsive tendencies, whether we are aware of them or not. This amazing book teaches us that compulsions are not simply negative impulses to be controlled. In fact, they are our allies and protectors, helping us cope with life. Mary O'Malley helps us to acknowledge these allies, and to meet them with awareness, love, and acceptance. The concept that we treat ourselves unkindly by trying to control compulsions, and that the act of controlling actually hides the wisdom that compulsions impart, was striking to me. It is in meeting compulsions with awareness, curiosity and acceptance that we open up to what they have to teach us; and in this opening, they reveal to us our deepest needs. With down-to-earth examples, Mary shows us how to recognize and learn from our compulsions, and how to begin meeting our needs at the soul-level. As important as this book is for the individual, its message also applies to society as a whole. What would the world be like if we were able to recognize and learn from our common compulsions, and were able, at last to begin meeting our deepest needs as families, as neighborhoods, as cultures, as countries, as earth-partners? I am thankful for Mary's wisdom, and I hope to see more books from her in the future

9 of 9 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Trusting Oneself, March 23, 2005

By	S. Bermudez (CA, USA) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

If you want to find a compassionate and insightful way of reconnecting and trusting yourself, read this book and take it to heart! Mary O'Malley's invites us to recognize compulsions for what they are: a survival system asking us to pay attention to the here and now.

I invite you to read it, so you too can begin to cultivate the healing power of attentive curiosity!